skydragon Posted December 21, 2012 Posted December 21, 2012 Hi everyone and thank you in advance for reading. So I been dating this girl for almost 2 months now but I have known her for a few years thanks to school. When we first started out it was great and now that honeymoon phase is over its pretty much troublesome. First things first, we started out last semester very close but when the summer came she didn't think we would work out and ended up dating some guy. Summer goes by and I was just what ever and did my own thing. When this semester started up she was still dating the guy but then something happen and they broke up. She wasn't into that relationship and he wasn't supportive of her when her dead was nearly dying. Being the good friend that I am I was around at the time and helped her out. We spent more time together and well what do ya know we hit it off. It did come together real quick but emotions were high mutually. Fast forward: Earlier this month she told me how she had sex with her ex ex boyfriend. She said it wasn't even that great and she needed it to make sure she had no more ties to him. She needed that closure. I actually wasn't mad or shocked about this...In fact I was expected her to cheat on me because I know the type of girl she is and her history. That same day she told me about that she also told me she kissed another guy. Since I been so busy with school and haven't been around the other guy kind of scooped it...again I was prepared for it and expected it. After she told me she has ceased talking to both of them completely and regrets it all and wish she never did it. Why am I still with her? Because I see that deep down there is that nice stable girl in there. She just has a very bad past and is completely opposite of me. I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt to work it through. Another thing is I find her verbally abusive. She is very over bearing and has a short fuse. I haven't told my friends because I don't want to hear it from them and because our friends are mutual. Lately, I been finding it hard to talk to her but I want to fix this relationship.
Author skydragon Posted December 21, 2012 Author Posted December 21, 2012 Dude, she's unstable. Do yourself a favor and leave her. She's dog****. She cheats constantly You say you guys have nothing in common LEAVE!! Part of me wants to leave and part of me doesn't. I guess its like I'm waiting to see if she'll eventually change and it sucks because it's the holiday season. We do have stuff in common but we are still opposites. It's kind of like yin and yang with us.
KatZee Posted December 21, 2012 Posted December 21, 2012 Yeah you guys are not compatible. And it really doesn't matter that you "see a stable girl in there." What you're even seeing could be your imagination and it's not up to you to stick with her to try to fix or help her. She needs to do that on her own. And she cheats? And is verbally abusive? You're just asking to be s.hit on some more. Wake up. But then again, you expected her to cheat on you. That says a lot more about you than it does her. You know her past, you knew she'd cheat, she did, and you stay. Tells a lot about how you view yourself and what you think you deserve from a relationship.
Author skydragon Posted December 21, 2012 Author Posted December 21, 2012 Yeah you guys are not compatible. And it really doesn't matter that you "see a stable girl in there." What you're even seeing could be your imagination and it's not up to you to stick with her to try to fix or help her. She needs to do that on her own. And she cheats? And is verbally abusive? You're just asking to be s.hit on some more. Wake up. But then again, you expected her to cheat on you. That says a lot more about you than it does her. You know her past, you knew she'd cheat, she did, and you stay. Tells a lot about how you view yourself and what you think you deserve from a relationship. I was giving this relationship a shot and because we spent the whole semester and past semester together studying, feelings just grew upon us. I do like her a lot and I have seen the best of her once. I'm kind of hoping I can see that come back...I'm just stubborn and want to see things through.
Author skydragon Posted December 21, 2012 Author Posted December 21, 2012 People don't change. I was in a relationship were I thought my ex had changed, and after 8 years she was the same person she was when I met her ( a peice of ****, she just masked it for a while). I as well am guilty of imagining somebody was something they weren't. Leave and find someone else you share more common ground with. 2 months isn't **** anyways. But I saw the the temporary change. She actually quit smoking and started going to the gym and was making her life healthier. But it looks like she reverting back to her old ways and i wish i could see the change again. I believe that if it was there before it can come back and all
KatZee Posted December 21, 2012 Posted December 21, 2012 But I saw the the temporary change. She actually quit smoking and started going to the gym and was making her life healthier. But it looks like she reverting back to her old ways and i wish i could see the change again. I believe that if it was there before it can come back and all If that's what you wanna do, knock yourself out. You're just setting yourself up for a whole s.hit ton of drama, pain and hurt. I guarantee you this won't end well. Be stubborn if you will but don't be surprised when it blows up in your face.
Author skydragon Posted December 23, 2012 Author Posted December 23, 2012 Key word "temporary". That's all it will be is temporary change, not real change. You guys are right...I just don't know which road to go down. I do have feelings for her. But it's very difficult to sort it all out...
xpaperxcutx Posted December 23, 2012 Posted December 23, 2012 It's admirable that she wanted to change, but because her history and actions have shown she's very prone to cheating, you shouldn't bother to try to salvage the relationship. It's one thing to be a doormat another thing to be the guy who ends up being cheated on. Trying to be the good guy and overlooking her mistakes just doesn't change things. It's up to her actions to prove she's worthy of you and unfortunately she has failed on that front.
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