odkits Posted December 20, 2012 Posted December 20, 2012 I'll try to keep this short. I went on a date with a university classmate of mine last night and I'm confused as to where things stand. We had a class together, exchanged numbers towards the end of the semester, and have been in touch via text for the past couple of weeks. We set up a dinner date for last night, and she told me on a couple of occasions how excited she was to go out with me. Dinner seemed to go really well, lasting about two hours. Conversation came really easily, we joked and teased each other, we kept really steady eye contact, and she smiled and laughed throughout. After dinner I said that we should do this again some time, to which she said yes, but we didn't make concrete plans. However, the following has me confused: - She did the majority of talking and didn't really ask me any questions about myself. My friends seem to think it's because she was a bit nervous, which seemed to be, but I still find it a bit odd that she didn't want to know more about me. - Lack of physical contact - we were seated at a pretty large table at dinner that didn't allow for much contact; I brushed her hand a couple of times while joking with her and gave her a hug when I first saw her. - We shared an awkwardish hug in my car to end the night. - We texted a bit after the date but she didn't seem too responsive. I know she was exhausted from a long day at work prior to the date, but she didn't respond to the last text I sent her, which contained a question. I plan on contacting her again in a few days, but I wish I knew where I stood with her. Any thoughts or comments? Thanks in advance.
dasein Posted December 20, 2012 Posted December 20, 2012 Only way to know is 1) how she responds to further date invitations, and 2) how she responds to escalating physical contact. Everything else is noise. Would consider not doing dinner dates for first dates going forward, consider active dates, galleries, museums, botanical garden, park, lake, stroll downtown looking at stuff (great around christmas) etc., with a brief stop into a restaurant for a couple of appetizers and drinks, 30 minutes eating tops. Sit at the bar so she can touch you if so inclined. Also consider not texting or contacting at all between date invites, and not discussing future plans during dates in progress. Go on fun date, wait a few days, ask out again for next date. This will keep you sane and not wondering about "how it went" in the interim. Good luck.
todreaminblue Posted December 20, 2012 Posted December 20, 2012 (edited) I'll try to keep this short. I went on a date with a university classmate of mine last night and I'm confused as to where things stand. We had a class together, exchanged numbers towards the end of the semester, and have been in touch via text for the past couple of weeks. We set up a dinner date for last night, and she told me on a couple of occasions how excited she was to go out with me. Dinner seemed to go really well, lasting about two hours. Conversation came really easily, we joked and teased each other, we kept really steady eye contact, and she smiled and laughed throughout. After dinner I said that we should do this again some time, to which she said yes, but we didn't make concrete plans. However, the following has me confused: - She did the majority of talking and didn't really ask me any questions about myself. My friends seem to think it's because she was a bit nervous, which seemed to be, but I still find it a bit odd that she didn't want to know more about me. - Lack of physical contact - we were seated at a pretty large table at dinner that didn't allow for much contact; I brushed her hand a couple of times while joking with her and gave her a hug when I first saw her. - We shared an awkwardish hug in my car to end the night. - We texted a bit after the date but she didn't seem too responsive. I know she was exhausted from a long day at work prior to the date, but she didn't respond to the last text I sent her, which contained a question. I plan on contacting her again in a few days, but I wish I knew where I stood with her. Any thoughts or comments? Thanks in advance. i dont ask a guy a lot of questions because i can at times be interrogative....ill bide my time ask some seemingly random questions thrown in a normal conversation..so they dont feel like i am actually asking anything or being too forward........i get nervous around guys i like so i would think the over talking could be attributed to this maybe....nerves can either get you to clam up and say zilch or you over compensate by being a bit loud.....nerves suck hey???? I ask a lot of questions when i start to feel more comfortable with a guy and relax a little.....but that also depends on my mood.....if i talk alot with a guy its pretty rare anyway......mostly i dont bar pleasantries....like hello...hows your day???/ so if i am being a chatterbox who wont shut up...theres attraction there and i am trying to mask it...which is really stupid because it just makes me look goofy and self centered...i am not......maybe your girl feels nervous because she is attracted to you and is overcompensating attempting to mask nerves..... I dont know about the physical contact thing i dont think it is a clear enough show of interest as you said it didnt really allow you to be physically close...........how i tell normally is when a guy puts his hand on my back, i think accidental hand brushes happen a lot and to me isn't an indicator....Did she initiate the hug or did you....i think its more telling when a female initiates a hug.....but as far as you showing interest it was a date wasnt it? so recap two hugs int eh one night ....////initiated by whom? hand brushes......nah.....i would have many guys interested in me if i believed this......just not possible...so she might not have taken stock in that..... hugs are often awkward when you first give them....especially if you have to ask....cough....ahem ...that kinda hug is hard...... i think you did all the right things being attentive eye contact and having actual fun convos....dates are always a little awkward until you get to know someone.......i have in the past cheated and date from the friend pool......i find it easier for me to relax..... it is a bit of a concern that she hasnt contacted you and is unresponsive xmas is however just around the corner....give her another text and ask her the same question keep the text light hearted not pushy and friendly...it should eb equal contact.....playing games is for kids.....so send her one more....and if she doesnt answer you have to play the waiting game...maybe she doesnt have credit...i still think people can throw that excuse down the toilet....its not a true statement not to call someone back..unless she doesnt check her landline answering machine.....there are always landlines unless you are in the sahara....so if you cant text or mobile someone usea landline...i do.....even then ...do they have land lines in the sahara???????...probably....hang on a sec is there a sheikh on this board....no im gonna google landlines in the sahara.....ill get back atcha........deb... Edited December 20, 2012 by todreaminblue
todreaminblue Posted December 20, 2012 Posted December 20, 2012 you can use sattelite phones in the sahara....i think himng eagles or pigeons might be more reliable.......i want a homing eagle.....or a hawk that would be cool to send a message to someoen by homing hawk.....you wouldnt want to piss off the bird.....grin...going to send a message to saint nick by homing hawk i am an extremely good girl so he should put a pressie under my tree...or at least a hug....for you i suggest you start with a pigeon...i ahev a good rapport with birds so i am going for the hawk birds love me .....except for pissed off cassowaries.never use them or attempt to pat them.......best wishes....deb
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