Takeshi Posted December 20, 2012 Posted December 20, 2012 This is going to be very very long, so I apoligize. I should have come for advice back when everything went down but I was a mess way back then. I had a girl who was my best friend about ten years, we were inseperable and started dating as Sophomores in highschool.When we went to college for three years together before moving four hours apart for University. We did the long distance thing for about...eight months? She comes back for Christmas, gets a ring, and is super excisted and shows everyone at church and such. Then shes home for a week and we have a minor tiff, which she says shes no longer in love. We break up a week before Valentines day 2012. I went out that night and got smashed, ended up engaged to a friend (not for good reasons), and we were enaged about five months before calling it off. During this time I NEVER contacted my ex, it wasnt until a week before a convention in march that I texted her, and only asked her for my things, nothing more. We see eachother then and have a bit of a make up, but I dont ask about getting together because hell, Im engaged, and we both claim were over the other (which was a lie for me at the time.) She finds out about my fiance and seems less then enthuised. (She also mentioned about my tattoo as I got a new one at that con, but she knew of the old one even though I had her blocked on my facebook after the breakup, so she mustve been stalking through a friend) Finals approach, I have a bad car wreck, and in my confusion I called my ex instead of my current GF to explain I had a wreck and Ill be late coming home that night, but not to worry. When I realized who I was talking to, she was very distant and honestly didnt seem to much give a damn. We see eachother a few weeks later to get a few of my things and get along well, as we leave we hug and for some dumb reason I kissed her on the forehead and told her I loved her, then immediately apoligized and said I had no idea where that came from. (she knew I was leaving for a date.) In April a long time mutual friend of ours got married, and she came home to be with the wedding. I brought a friend to the wedding and honeslty Ive never seen her give me such a dirty look, intentional or not. She seems very curious of my date, and not too happy about her either. (asked names of girls I dated after her, although she shoudlnt known them being blocked)She makes a few comments about me looking good in purple and how Ive taken great care of myself and such before I left. One of the other girls asked if she was okay about the girl and she claims "she seems nice I guess" and stuff, which didnt seem very convincing. After the wedding I started to fall for the girl I took as a date. Things were complicated and I dated another girl before we split and I was with my wedding date, though we are still not official due to other issues that arent important to this. During this time I didnt contact my ex more than a text or two now and again. Fast forward to September, all contact was lost, she wont reply to text, email, or phone calls. I have honestly no idea why. With her coming into town I really want to try and see how shes doing, she dumped me, and she seemed to be over it far before I did. However the way shes acting seems to say otherwise. I dont want to date her, but Id love to reconnect our friendship with the long history we had.Im friends with ALL of my other exes other than her, Im an easy going and level guy,so Ive never had a bad breakup (although this one might be calledt hat, as she was esentially cheating on me online and that is what started the original argument) Shes apparently not dated since me, but honestly I kinda think shes swung to the other team, even if true shes not had a girlfriend either. So any ideas on how to reconnect? Mutual friends wont do anything as theyre female and dont seem interested in helping me, though they say they will they then dissappear and dont text or cal lback either for weeks until they forgot about asking her.Were likely to see eachother at church this week or at work as her grandmother works with me and plans on bringing her to say hi to the other employees as she used to work there for five years with me. Or if anything, anyone know perhaps why she might be acting like this? A friend suggested Gigs that has worn off and perhaps shes too pridefull to admit anything or doesnt want to chance feelings from coming back. (Since she changed so much in what she did and like seems like Gigs) I dont want there to be animosity, we had a close group of friends from about sixth grade up until this year. I wont likely get to go to our ten year reunion so I plan on trying to get everyone of my close friends together one last day in 2014 before I leave abroad for teaching, as Idon't plan on coming back unless something major happens and I have to return to take care of something. Id like to be able to leave and be able to see her first on friendly terms.
Author Takeshi Posted December 20, 2012 Author Posted December 20, 2012 (edited) I was only engaged once, when my ex received the ring it was made clear it wasn't a proposal, we had agreed not to marry until school was over for us both. When I did become engaged later it was to a friend, and only for a green card, we had no feelings involved and that ended once we obtained her extension legally. The girl I was interested in from the wedding showed no signs of interest and was going back home to Vietnam at the end of August, so since she was interested, but didn't tell me until later, the girl I was involved in was just a friend with benefits, she became attached so I broke it off to avoid hurting her. So technically, I've been single a good part of the end, just sampling. Edited December 20, 2012 by Takeshi
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