Moving On

[GraceisGone]

I guess I've been doing everything I can to move on. I haven't spoken to my ex in over a month, after she came back after a couple months of NC.

 

It's been tough, because I look at where I was a couple of months ago, when I was so set on moving on, and then she came back and ruined all my progress. She came back, and acted as if nothing happened and like we might get back together. Obviously that didn't happen, and it set me back, a whole lot. I guess she just had to test out her feelings, but in the end, it really put a number on me.

 

I sometimes think of the past, how we didn't talk for a while, and she really began to miss me. I feel like that may happen again, but then come to the realization that it won't, that we are over for good. It really sucks, because I have been through this before and she ended up coming back, but now, I realize that won't happen.

 

I am finally getting to the point where I am realizing that she isn't bothered with the fact that we might never speak again and it wouldn't bother her one bit. That really hurts after all we have been through, but I guess that is just life.

 

It's difficult, even though this is my first serious relationship, I feel like it has really set me back. I thought what we had was the real deal, but I guess not.

 

I'm at the point where I really need to start trying things with other girls. I feel this is important, because sometimes I feel like I will never have what me and my ex had again. I have had other flings for a couple of months, but this was my first real relationship.

 

Sometimes I feel like I am trying to hard to make things happen. I feel like everytime there is a girl I like and I try to pursue it, nothing happens. Every girl I have had a fling with or dated, has pretty much come to me. It just confuses me why I can't ever make anything happen myself.

 

Just ranting I guess. I really do miss my ex and don't want to feel like I am trying to replace her, but I feel like this is the next step to moving on for good. I need other women in my life to keep my mind off of her, and sometimes it just feels like I'm doing all the wrong things in trying to pursue that. I'm confused as to why for once, I can't just pursue something I want, rather than having it come to me.

Edited December 18, 2012 by GraceisGone

[oracle]

You aren't ready for another woman in your life. Do not inflict yourself on anyone at this time. Your experience - their experience will be centered around your current failed relationship and your ex.

 

Stop asking the WHY questions. See it at face value and accept it as it is.

 

Once you are used to your new life.. happy and independant. Then you will be ready for a new relationship. You will know its time cause you won't be seeking it out of desperation to replace what you have now lost.

 

 

I guess I've been doing everything I can to move on. I haven't spoken to my ex in over a month, after she came back after a couple months of NC.

 

It's been tough, because I look at where I was a couple of months ago, when I was so set on moving on, and then she came back and ruined all my progress. She came back, and acted as if nothing happened and like we might get back together. Obviously that didn't happen, and it set me back, a whole lot. I guess she just had to test out her feelings, but in the end, it really put a number on me.

 

I sometimes think of the past, how we didn't talk for a while, and she really began to miss me. I feel like that may happen again, but then come to the realization that it won't, that we are over for good. It really sucks, because I have been through this before and she ended up coming back, but now, I realize that won't happen.

 

I am finally getting to the point where I am realizing that she isn't bothered with the fact that we might never speak again and it wouldn't bother her one bit. That really hurts after all we have been through, but I guess that is just life.

 

It's difficult, even though this is my first serious relationship, I feel like it has really set me back. I thought what we had was the real deal, but I guess not.

 

I'm at the point where I really need to start trying things with other girls. I feel this is important, because sometimes I feel like I will never have what me and my ex had again. I have had other flings for a couple of months, but this was my first real relationship.

 

Sometimes I feel like I am trying to hard to make things happen. I feel like everytime there is a girl I like and I try to pursue it, nothing happens. Every girl I have had a fling with or dated, has pretty much come to me. It just confuses me why I can't ever make anything happen myself.

 

Just ranting I guess. I really do miss my ex and don't want to feel like I am trying to replace her, but I feel like this is the next step to moving on for good. I need other women in my life to keep my mind off of her, and sometimes it just feels like I'm doing all the wrong things in trying to pursue that. I'm confused as to why for once, I can't just pursue something I want, rather than having it come to me.

[GraceisGone]

What you said make sense, and you're probably right, I'm not ready for anyone else right now, especially a serious relationship. This is the first time I've gone through a loss of this magnitude and it sucks.

 

I guess the question still remains though, why I'm not able to seek out relationships, why they always just come to me. Why does the girl always have all the power, why can't I be the one to find someone I want and seek them, even if it's just a casual relationship. Do I have to go through life regretting everything that happened with my ex and waiting for someone else to come along because I can't pursue someone myself?