theLWord Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 So I'm a lesbian, dated my gf for a year, and I broke up with her about two and a half months ago. We were long distance, she lied to me a lot.. I broke it off, but I got treated very badly. I've suffered, I've wanted her back. I've broken no contact once, her once. It's been a cry fest everytime we get on the phone, so I reblocked her number. Anyway, a month of NC, she e-mails me saying she will be in town the 22nd, and is begging to see me. I asked her why? "I just really want to see you." So we talked a little via text and we were doing the same conversations. I asked her what she wanted to say (basically because I don't want to hear about who she's dating/how great she's doing.) She said she, "doesn't know what she wants until she talks to me." So I'm guessing she wants to see if the feelings are still there. We also agreed to take a week to think about what we both want, all of which I've done a lot of already. I'm terrified to see her in a way just because I know how attracted to her I am, but I want her to see me because of how much I've changed since the break up. I feel like I can handle the meeting, or I hope. We never really got to say goodbye since I had to break up with her over the phone due to the distance. I don't really have anything unresolved to say, but apparently she does. I think she may want me back. But honestly, I'm starting to get back what I love in my life. My passions. Everything I neglected. I am regaining confidence, drive, and ambition. I lost a lot of myself through all this. Then sometimes it does come up in my head that maybe the time apart could make us have a healthier relationship. But either way, I think I can handle this meeting. I just don't know what she wants. I'm worried seeing her will set me back but then again. Should I prepare myself for the worst? How much emotion should I show? I know I probably shouldn't even go, but I know I'd regret it if I didn't. If you've met up with your ex after a few months, how did it go?
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