Sun Devil Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 As some of you know, I have been trying to improve myself for 2 reasons. One is to attract women, and the other is to improve myself for myself. I want to know what does it take to become the guy that attracts women. More specifically, what does it take to attract college girls since I am in college.
coffeebean201 Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 We like to date a guy that we can learn something from. A "showing by doing" kind of guy. Far too many guys think they need to be obnoxious alphas to get a woman. Big turn off. A good network of friends is also attractive to a woman. (Avoid having a gaggle of bros). And a good job.
truth_prevails Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 Women want a lot of things from their relationships with men, but those things may not necessarily make them want to have a relationship with you. I think that's the confusing part for men, when women say I want this or I want that, and you're thinking well I have those things so why don't you want me. Like coffeebean's example, "We like to date a guy that we can learn something from", but that doesn't mean "all guys that we can learn something from we would like to date". (sorry to pick on you , coffeebean but you were the first person to respond). This might sound politically incorrect, but what women really want is a guy that makes her feel like a woman. Almost everything else she can just get by being friends. She wants a guy that will make her feel like she's small, vulnerable, emotional. She wants a guy that makes her feel like she is or could be a good lover, a good wife, a good mother. And not every woman is going to be the same in how far you can take that, but that contrast between her being the woman and you being the man is basically the whole point of a heterosexual relationship. It's the reason, why you're not just friends. So be bold, be brave, be strong. Take her out of her comfort zone and then make her feel safe. Make her cook for you, and tell her it's the best thing you've ever tasted. Be passionate. Stand up for yourself and your values, even if it means standing up against her. Make her think, "Wow, this guy really makes me feel like a woman!". 1
yongyong Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 you should add your height to your question and ask them if they HAVE dated a guy in your height (will consider doesn't work) That's your real advice.
Author Sun Devil Posted December 18, 2012 Author Posted December 18, 2012 Why should I ask if they have dated a man of my height. There are not too many men my height, so most will have not.
musemaj11 Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 The answer is simple, though its not as simple to achieve it. 1. Be financially attractive (Most effective) 2. Be socially attractive (Second most effective) 3. Be physically attractive (Third most effective) If you can possess all of them then you will be banging different hot girls everyday.
Vercetti Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 I think there is some good advice / perspective in the " wish to be attractive for a day " topic ( and yeah I think some of that good advice was mine ). Texas girl had some good things to say. Anyhow collage girls, this isn't to deep. If you have a car / place to stay / maybe some alcohol and drugs / cigarettes and food you should just be able to post up on your collage strip and pull some girl ( note not everything on that list is required it just makes it that much easier ). Coffee-shop / Head-shop / Pool-hall / Tattoo-shop / Bars / Live music clubs / raves and party's / parks / Laundromat. Hell check out events in collage, oh interpretive dance I think ill sit on the floor to catch some of that. Get into a few circles and things will work out very well for you, get with the older crowd ( still in / just out / hangs around collage types ). Oh and ID the girls, you want collage not high-school runaway types. Also don't worry acting crazy will turn off nice girls...
Snowman219 Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 Did you not see the thread I created a few hours ago?: The Answer to Everyone's Dating Problems HAHA. Wow, what a waste of 5 minutes. Was a good laugh though.
Michal2012 Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 I think she is cute, simple and understandable.
crude Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 Just do 10x as many things for her as she would ever do for you. Then you have a 40% chance of getting a woman, and a 100% chance of being a woman's doormat.
monicaelise Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 As some of you know, I have been trying to improve myself for 2 reasons. One is to attract women, and the other is to improve myself for myself. I want to know what does it take to become the guy that attracts women. More specifically, what does it take to attract college girls since I am in college. If you want to be a man that women want, listen to what women are telling you they want. Don't waste your time trying to apply "advice" given to you from men in the exact same position as you are. If they knew what women wanted, they wouldn't be continually failing with them. 1
tman666 Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 If you focus on across the board improvement, you will be on the right track. Why wouldn't someone want to improve in something that positively affects them? Social improvements could be: learning a second language or instrument, learning to be more conversational with EVERYONE, developing your sense of humor and wit, being more outgoing, opening yourself up to new groups of people, etc. Educational improvements could be: earn your degree, participate in internships in your field, take on a double major or an extra minor, obtain a certification related to something that interests you, read more, etc. Physical improvements could include learning a new sport, joining a coed softball/flag football/volleyball team, getting faster, getting stronger, getting more muscular, losing fat, being able to run further, etc. The key thing with all of these is that they have to be improvements that YOU want to do and that YOU see value in. When you set your own goals that are for your own benefit as you see it, when you accomplish those goals, it will build self confidence and you will feel like you "own" it more. If you set goals solely based on what other people want, your success will be hollow and your failures will be humiliating.
Vercetti Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 If you want to be a man that women want, listen to what women are telling you they want. Don't waste your time trying to apply "advice" given to you from men in the exact same position as you are. If they knew what women wanted, they wouldn't be continually failing with them. Hey now not all of us are failing. I dated successfully before and during collage and would have dated successfully after if I did not encounter my theater major wife of fourteen years Wouldn't give any advice beyond my experience ( hence the ID thing ) and part of that advice was to listen to women. Texas girl spoke of emotional intelligence and that's what wanted him to run into. Anyhow growing up with two little sisters, various girlfriends and social situations, and now being with my wife; think I have a bit of perspective to offer someone just stepping into the world of dating. Only do understand where you are coming from with your post...
Vercetti Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 If you focus on across the board improvement, you will be on the right track. Why wouldn't someone want to improve in something that positively affects them? Social improvements could be: learning a second language or instrument, learning to be more conversational with EVERYONE, developing your sense of humor and wit, being more outgoing, opening yourself up to new groups of people, etc. Educational improvements could be: earn your degree, participate in internships in your field, take on a double major or an extra minor, obtain a certification related to something that interests you, read more, etc. Physical improvements could include learning a new sport, joining a coed softball/flag football/volleyball team, getting faster, getting stronger, getting more muscular, losing fat, being able to run further, etc. The key thing with all of these is that they have to be improvements that YOU want to do and that YOU see value in. When you set your own goals that are for your own benefit as you see it, when you accomplish those goals, it will build self confidence and you will feel like you "own" it more. If you set goals solely based on what other people want, your success will be hollow and your failures will be humiliating. This is supposed to be funny so don't go getting mad at me... Social improvements could be: Better drug connections and being friends with the door people DJs and bartenders in all the clubs. Educational improvements could be: Learning how to make a gravity bong or how many hits of acid someone should take or just learning the metric system for some reason. Physical improvements could include: Getting some tattoos or piercings a few bottles of manic panic dye or frosty blue lips from all the fun you're having. The key thing with all of these is that they have to be improvements that YOU want to do and that YOU see value in. When you set your own goals that are for your own benefit as you see it, when you accomplish those goals, it will build self confidence and you will feel like you "own" it more.
monicaelise Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 Hey now not all of us are failing. I dated successfully before and during collage and would have dated successfully after if I did not encounter my theater major wife of fourteen years Wouldn't give any advice beyond my experience ( hence the ID thing ) and part of that advice was to listen to women. Texas girl spoke of emotional intelligence and that's what wanted him to run into. Anyhow growing up with two little sisters, various girlfriends and social situations, and now being with my wife; think I have a bit of perspective to offer someone just stepping into the world of dating. Only do understand where you are coming from with your post... Sorry? I don't recall addressing you, or anyone in particular for that matter. I have no idea how successful you are or aren't. If you're successful with women, rock on buddy! The OP asked how to become a man that women want. His best bet is to find out what women want. Women are a pretty good source of information when it comes to their own wants. If I wanted to know what men want, I'd ask men. It's very simple really.
Vercetti Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 Sorry? I don't recall addressing you, or anyone in particular for that matter. I have no idea how successful you are or aren't. If you're successful with women, rock on buddy! The OP asked how to become a man that women want. His best bet is to find out what women want. Women are a pretty good source of information when it comes to their own wants. If I wanted to know what men want, I'd ask men. It's very simple really. You don't have to recall addressing anyone its a public board. Already agreed with you that seeking a woman's perspective is wise, perhaps you should share some of your wisdom as opposed to simply saying what a great source. The OP stated collage girls...so what do collage girls want? I'm guessing the OP desires to have sex as much as any relationship...you gonna give him keys to the kingdom?
monicaelise Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 You don't have to recall addressing anyone its a public board. Already agreed with you that seeking a woman's perspective is wise, perhaps you should share some of your wisdom as opposed to simply saying what a great source. The OP stated collage girls...so what do collage girls want? I'm guessing the OP desires to have sex as much as any relationship...you gonna give him keys to the kingdom? Well, I certainly would if I were a college girl. Fact is, I haven't been a college "girl" in many years and my wants are probably different than those of most college girls. I certainly wouldn't be so brazen to speak on behalf of a group that I am not a part of myself. If I were his target audience, I would offer up my advice. Since I am not, my advice is for him to consult the women he's after and to set aside the well-intentioned, but often erroneous, information that his fellow (failed) hunters are offering up. Once again, I wasn't talking to you. As you may have noticed, I quoted the OP, not you, so it's not entirely clear why you think I care about what you've said. I didn't even bother to read your original post, as it wasn't addressed to me and I am not looking to become a man that women want.
Vercetti Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 Well, I certainly would if I were a college girl. Fact is, I haven't been a college "girl" in many years and my wants are probably different than those of most college girls. I certainly wouldn't be so brazen to speak on behalf of a group that I am not a part of myself. If I were his target audience, I would offer up my advice. Since I am not, my advice is for him to consult the women he's after and to set aside the well-intentioned, but often erroneous, information that his fellow (failed) hunters are offering up. Once again, I wasn't talking to you. As you may have noticed, I quoted the OP, not you, so it's not entirely clear why you think I care about what you've said. I didn't even bother to read your original post, as it wasn't addressed to me and I am not looking to become a man that women want. Aye, we are fine no worries I simply got the idea you were knocking male perspective while I was open to women's perspective, sorry if became a tad defensive. My only desire is equality. Anyhow I do know where you are coming from, had a friend that never had a girlfriend or really got any 2nd dates that would try and have men talk with me. When you're married with a child and a single guy is raving about the " boyfriend breaker " chapter in his old PUA book. Wow is all can say about that.
betterdeal Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 As some of you know, I have been trying to improve myself for 2 reasons. One is to attract women, and the other is to improve myself for myself. I want to know what does it take to become the guy that attracts women. More specifically, what does it take to attract college girls since I am in college. Some observations I've made over time: 1. If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything 2. Go about your business as though you have a secret no-one else does. A really good one that other's would like to know. 3. Don't ask yourself am I right for her; ask is she right for me? 4. Don't be afraid to show your feelings, although you don't have to. 5. Sex is not a sin. 6. Learn to flirt. 7. Enjoy their company and they'll enjoy yours.
Keenly Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 The answer is simple, though its not as simple to achieve it. 1. Be financially attractive (Most effective) 2. Be socially attractive (Second most effective) 3. Be physically attractive (Third most effective) If you can possess all of them then you will be banging different hot girls everyday. I have to call this answer out. I'm 23, make 17 an hour at a fantastic job, smart as well as funny and socially pleasant, and I'm pretty sure I'm not unattractive. I can count the number of women who have ever expressed interest in me on one hand.
jcrew11 Posted December 19, 2012 Posted December 19, 2012 As some of you know, I have been trying to improve myself for 2 reasons. One is to attract women, and the other is to improve myself for myself. I want to know what does it take to become the guy that attracts women. More specifically, what does it take to attract college girls since I am in college. What kind of quality traits do you already possess? Why would someone say you are a "great catch" right now? Over time, increasing wealth, and improved grooming and clothes help make you more appealing and attractive. Are you a "good" person who helps out others and volunteers? Are you a cool and interesting person that has interesting hobbies besides video games? Do you have a lot of female friends and can relate to females? Are you a fun and funny guy?
Author Sun Devil Posted December 19, 2012 Author Posted December 19, 2012 I know that increasing wealth will help, but I am focusing more on my personality. What personality attracts the most women? Does showing leadership and charisma help?
Vercetti Posted December 19, 2012 Posted December 19, 2012 I know that increasing wealth will help, but I am focusing more on my personality. What personality attracts the most women? Does showing leadership and charisma help? For me hit collage after had a wild ride of a relationship with a girl ran off to New Orleans with. So I was a bit devil may care. If a girl would run off with me to a city where we knew no one then surely talking with girls / going out with them isn't a problem. Plus it being collage back in hometown, experience of living by ones wits in a new city gave a bit of advantage next to those stuck in dorms / stuck with tons of room-mates / still living at home. Think if I would have been groveling how cute the girls are and trying to express what a stand up guy I was and selling some grand ambition ideas I would have straight up failed. Basically everything could be out of control but would maintain composure. Hell I struck out the girl that would become my wife after a few dates ( she got all these I'm not sure feelings and all I could do was walk away to aid her in the decision making process ). At the time was a horrid feeling as my wife was someone I would apparently love to have a relationship with. Collage was insane lots of casual sex and drugs...one day a girl is with you the next night she is getting screwed in the ass by a drug dealer for coke in a bathroom somewhere. Have to walk things like that off all the time. There is really nothing to lose and everything to gain unless wind up with a STD and needle in your arm. What people are doing will really screw with your mind if you have half a heart.
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