breaktheheart Posted December 18, 2012 Posted December 18, 2012 This is a male friend of mine who I only started speaking to several months ago. I met him online, well I found him upon seeking help for something that I was working on and was struggling and he offered to help. I was at such a low point of my life so I guess you can say he entered my life at the right time, right place because things I felt were falling apart, and for a long time I wasn't satisfied, there was just something missing. I've been through so much throughout my life although i'm young, and have just become worn out; people have hurt me a lot in my past. I grew afraid to love, to allow myself to get to close to people. Only this year had I surrendered a part of myself to others a little more; I started learning to love and to seek others because I wanted that, I wanted to live a life where I could be open to others. I fell for this boy - hard. We ended up talking lots and he helped me through so much, we talked for several months, everyday and I grew very attached, he offered time after time to help me on my struggles, he was just there. Whenever I felt awful, I had someone to talk to. Someone who cared in that kind of way; it felt too good to be true considering he didn't know me very well at the start. I have very close female friends, but he was different, there was something more about him. He inspired me, he changed my life, it sounds crazy but this was somebody I wanted to meet for such a long time, I was getting so tired of the kinds of people I was surrounded by and he was refreshing; he inspired me because he went out and did everything I wanted to do, turned himself into somebody he wanted to be, and those are two things that I live by. He was ambitious, incredibly kind, interesting, and just there, always there. What he helped me with happened to be the thing that mattered the most in my life at the time - he helped me along the way of making my dreams come true; and given how big it is and how much I struggled, it meant the universe to me. I fell, harder than hard, and then when I met him he broke my heart, perhaps inadvertently but he did. He proved himself to be very careless, the events that took place aptly demonstrate that. There was another girl involved and other things which I pain to even think about. I feel like i've been totally led on, he made me feel special, only to throw it in my face that he never really cared, but that he was actually using me the whole time, because he gained satisfaction out of having helped someone, anyone. He talked to me out of pity. Pity, nobody likes to be pitied, it almost makes me feel inferior, I'm not, but it's gotten to the point that I actually actually do feel it pretty strongly because of how much he's hurt me and how used I feel. I need to move on. It's been 2 months since I last saw him but there's not a day that I go by without thinking about him, and who I thought he was. Every time he crosses my mind, I ache a little inside, my heart sinks, it wrenches, of hatred, pain, heartbreak, and yet I still think of him, I still wish it was different, and I know that if he ever wanted me the way I wanted him, I would take him back, because he made me feel so so special and I thought he was the guy who every young girl wishes she'd meet eventually, to prove all the others wrong. I need to move on, i'll say it again, I tell myself all the time. How? I've tried so much. I've almost become dysfunctional.
Marie0708 Posted December 24, 2012 Posted December 24, 2012 I'm dealing with something like this right now. Granted it's only been one day, but it still really hurts to think about him
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 24, 2012 Posted December 24, 2012 You are young. The chances of you meeting someone to settle down with...are slim. Never take people beyond face value. What I mean is, it is easy to pretend to be caring over the internet or in real life even. People are two-faced. Chances are, you will get your heart broken a lot, before you find that "one." This boy is scum for leading you on. If indeed he was leading you on. He may have just friendly wanted to help you. It's life...won't be the first time dear or the last. Grow a little, LOL, everything at your age is serious love...when it may not.
stillafool Posted December 24, 2012 Posted December 24, 2012 We don't know if she is young or not. She will not respond to her thread.
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