youngnlove89 Posted December 15, 2012 Posted December 15, 2012 It's been two weeks since my ex and I have made any contact. The first week was kind of rough for me, but the minute I changed my number and cut that last string, was the minute I actually felt like I let him go. If you haven't cut that cord yet, cut it NOW! I know how hard it is to get those scissors and even fathom of cutting it, but don't think about it and just do it! Trust me. I feel like this weight has been lifted off of me. I can SEE all the reasons why it wouldn't have worked out. I can SEE that he did not love me the same way. 1. He didn't take me out on trips with his friends who all had girlfriends that went with them! *having that cord still attached, I wasn't able to see how big of a red flag that was* 2. He didn't talk to his mom. The whole 1.5 years we were together, he texted her twice, JUST TWICE, to give her a little update on his life. I want a guy who loves his mom. I couldn't imagine not talking to mine! 3. He didn't ever want to get married *I was very naive about this and thought I could change his mind, lesson learned: next guy who is against marriage, I'm cutting him loose at day one.* 4. He never bought me ANYTHING. He did buy me flowers twice in the beginning of our relationship and bought dinner here and there. But, for two of my birthday's, valentines day and christmas....NOTHING. Not even a card. 5. After 1.5 years our relationship was stagnant. No progression what-so-ever. We didn't move in together or even talk about it. We hardly went on trips together and we never talked about our future. Boy, was a naive?! The list could go on, it really could. But that would be more for me, than all of you. I feel fresh and ready to live life the way I should. By letting him go, I have chosen to fight for what I want: Happiness and a committed relationship! 1
na49 Posted December 15, 2012 Posted December 15, 2012 I'm so happy to see you're progress. Looking at your threads the past few weeks compared to this one makes me think you're moving on well. I'm having trouble cutting the final cord and blocking my exes number but I know that I have to do it. I don't want to think of it as letting her go, she's already let me go and had no problem doing it. She also had no problem cheating on me and leading me on for as long as she did. She didn't have any problem demonizing me to her new college friends and making me look like a huge jerk when I only did everything I could to make her happy. Oh and I trusted her, big mistake.
Author youngnlove89 Posted December 15, 2012 Author Posted December 15, 2012 I'm so happy to see you're progress. Looking at your threads the past few weeks compared to this one makes me think you're moving on well. I'm having trouble cutting the final cord and blocking my exes number but I know that I have to do it. I don't want to think of it as letting her go, she's already let me go and had no problem doing it. She also had no problem cheating on me and leading me on for as long as she did. She didn't have any problem demonizing me to her new college friends and making me look like a huge jerk when I only did everything I could to make her happy. Oh and I trusted her, big mistake. If she cheated on you, definitely cut the chord. I was cheated on in the past and we tried to make things work after that. They don't. It failed big time and all we did was fight. I know it hurts to see them screw up a good thing and you can't fix it. It's out of your control and that is what is hurting you. But let her go. Don't think too much about why you should or shouldn't change your number. It's not the end of the world. If a miracle were to spontaneously happen and she all of a sudden changed into this perfect woman you are seeking, there are other ways of contacting her. But that isn't the case. She is a cheater and a liar and you deserve better and that is WHY you should change your number.
na49 Posted December 15, 2012 Posted December 15, 2012 You're right. She did screw up something great. She had a lot of problems, and a lot of guys won't put up with her the way I did. Let her figure that out for herself. She made her decision, and it wasn't me. She can be her new friend's problem now. Going to them and telling them that I'm a jerk when I did nothing at all to deserve that isn't something that a girlfriend would do or even a friend. Worried about failing classes or losing your scholarship? Go cry to someone else, I won't be there for you anymore. I'm too much of a nice guy and it got me stepped on. I need to stick up for myself more, and that starts now. My last way of sticking up to her will be when I block her number. I don't believe what she did was right, and she's so used to her ex boyfriends giving in to her and being her moral support. Not me though. We didn't break up on good terms. And we probably can never be friends, I'll never be able to trust her. ever. I just need to tell my dad to block the number and be done with it. I'm sure I'll have trouble dealing with it for a while, but the long term effect is worth it. She's not coming back, and I realize that. Can't wait until I just get it over with. It's not easy as you know.
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