Radu Posted December 14, 2012 Posted December 14, 2012 OP, KungFuJoe and DY some very awesome posts on the first page [and it is very unusual for me to say this about DY]. The Alpha/Beta theory also kinda explains it [though the ovaries dying is just bull**** ], i advise you to reread those posts and look into evolutionary psychology. EP explains why we feel a certain way about the gender that is attractive to us, why men have the instinctual need to protect, why women are more psychologically sophisticated, etc ... You also mentioned that growing up you saw your mom not having much say in the house, that has probably affected you. Finally, i want you to look on the bright side. You are 22 and you figured this stuff out, this is the age that you had this epiphany that your perception of reality might not be the best and have decided that you want to change things. Some of us had this 'a-ha' moment much later in life, i hope that makes you feel better. PS: As you read more on these subjects and look inside yourself you will find that you are capable of following all kind of emotions deep inside to the core of it all ... this is fantastic.
USMCHokie Posted December 14, 2012 Posted December 14, 2012 Here's something to consider. Perhaps you subconsciously (or consciously) feel like you have nothing to offer the higher quality men. They have their life together, and you have nothing to add to their life, especially if you don't have your life together. You're not an asset to the quality men. You're a liability. So you're left helping the broken three-legged puppies because that's all you know how to do or are able to do. Your standards for yourself don't have to be high because the standards of those men are not high. Easy day.
thatone Posted December 14, 2012 Posted December 14, 2012 I just realized. I am one of those girls that likes guys that are entirely wrong for them. The reason I dated my ex of 2 years was because I felt sympathetic and I wanted to fix/help him. I was always there for him, and trying to change him; while he was never supportive to me. This recent guy I like has clearly shown he has no interest. He doesn't call/text and he wants me to find a guys that is right for me (bc its clearly not him). However, he is emotionally unstable and over-analyzes everything that happens between us. He is socially awkward, and yet, I want to spend ALL my time with him! I can't get enough! Then, there are these two guys that have ALWAYS been there for me and would treat me like a queen if I ever accepted their date requests, yet I feel nothing! It feels wrong to date these nice guys, like they can't offer me anything, when I know they can! Does anyone else have his problem? Will this feeling change as I mature? I am only 22 and have only had one serious relationship. Also, what happened to Gibson? Where did he go?! Because you like the drama. And you have this ingrained notion that it is your job to please everyone else, and if someone isn't happy it's your duty to 'fix' their feelings. And it's familiar to you because you watched your mother waste her existence away doing the same thing. It isn't specific to age, I have dated women my age (late 30s) who STILL can't get over it. Ask yourself if you want to be fighting with an addicted/unemployed douchebag when you're 40 over who spent the social security check on weed and booze. If not, find a therapist and fix it now. 1
CptObvious Posted December 14, 2012 Posted December 14, 2012 You're 22 so I'd say you gotta wait about 12 more years until you acquire the taste for "nice guys"
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