Javabear Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 I miss you most in the morning, when my head is still cloudy with sleep and my skin begs to be woken by your kiss. There is nothing more comforting, after a restless night of dreaming, than to wake up next to the person who is better than any dream. Safe, warm and wrapped in blankets, my head on your chest and your fingers running through my hair is the only way I remember feeling loved. I am by no means beautiful in these early hours, but you would look at me with those deep green eyes and sleepy smile as if I was everything perfect wrapped into one. I would forego three years of fancy dates, road trips and little gifts to have one more morning like this. I wonder if there is a part of you that wakes up lonely too. But, as my head clears I remember that you are the one who gave all of this up, and I miss you just a little less. 3
LostOne1 Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 I do remember sometimes in the mornings. It's like you wake up and realize something is missing. And then you decide to pull yourself out of the bed and realize it's all in the past. That the future is here now and that person is NO LONGER part of your life. Yeah we wish they would come back... but I doubt it will happen. So we move on with the day and as it goes along we slowly forget them.
na49 Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 I also know the feeling. I used to check my phone to a bunch of good morning texts and her telling me what she's up to even though she knew I was still asleep. I miss her blowing up my phone, because now it barely ever rings or vibrates. Waking up is hard, I know that if I let myself, I'd lay in bed all day just thinking about her. The relationship. Where I went wrong. What I should have done differently. But none of that will change anything. She lived life before she met me. She will live it without me. I have to do the same. I know that I did everything that I could. I was very supportive, trusted her, was not controlling at all. Never abused her emotionally or physically. Was very giving. (almost too giving, blowing paychecks on expensive gifts and dinner for her) I treated her like a princess, but felt more like her slave than a prince. In return for all of my charity, I was cheated on and left for a guy who will never love her like I did. Who will break her heart once the semester is over and he graduates. I used to think he stole her from me and got angry with him. Then I realized, she gave herself to him. it was him or me. and she picked him. He's the rich 24 year old rock star with all of the money and the car, how could I be so stupid? Of course she'd pick him. Now I am indifferent towards both of them. Oh well.. that's life. Dear diary lol 1
LostOne1 Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 yeah I went through that phase of my cell phone and checking her msgs all the time. Honestly I had my cell phone pretty much for her. Now I just have it sitting around mostly and get texts here and there from close friends once in awhile and that's it... And your right man.. it's not your fault.. SHE made the DECISION to go to someone else. I think you and me both blamed ourselves at the start and saying we could've done this or that.. and sure maybe we could've. But also our EX'S made the decision to bail out on us like garbage. So why should be feel bad? Yeah it hurts our ego and self esteem, but at the end of the day we never left them. We should feel proud that we would've worked it out and we didn't throw them away like garbage.
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