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Posted

My boyfriend and I have been together for about 9 months. He has always treated me like I was a princess, he rubbed my feet, cooked for me, bought me some stuff, picked me up on nights I didn't have my car. And I treat him well too. I love him so much I really do. He's my dream man :) but a couple weeks ago I came home from his house and just felt extremely sad. From out of nowhere. I didn't sleep for a couple days. I felt like I had to break up with him, but for what reason? He makes me so happy and I love him, but I couldnt get that thought out of my head...

So today I told my parents about it, and they wanted me to talk to the doctor about it beings as we have a family history of depression. I did, and I'm now prescribed anti-depressants and I will start counseling next week. I told my boyfriend I needed some space because this (and I'm stressed out with other things too) And he's pretty sad over it. I told him we would get back together once my feelings are sorted out, but I didn't want to make any promises. This really sucks. Any advice?

Posted

Two things

 

1.) Don't give him false hope. Are you 100% sure you'll want him back? Would you want to wait for someone who might never change their mind?

 

2.) How does being with him depress you or degrade your situation?

Posted
......I'm now prescribed anti-depressants and I will start counseling next week.

 

Why? Over what?

 

 

 

I told my boyfriend I needed some space because this (and I'm stressed out with other things too) And he's pretty sad over it. I told him we would get back together once my feelings are sorted out, but I didn't want to make any promises. This really sucks. Any advice?

 

You will find that virtually every time someone tells us their SO requested a break, almost everyone has come back and said "Don't fall for it - 'break' = break-UP. "

 

This is no exception.

 

Don't keep him hanging there for your own comfort.

Him being there for you when you're ready to pick up 'where you left off' is for your convenience, not his.

You've tuned him into your 'soft place to fall when I'm ready for you'. Your 'back-up plan'.

 

If you're not in the right frame or state of mind to be in a relationship - then have the courage to sever ties and let him move on.

But hanging him out to dry in limbo, until you're done with this phase, is really unfair, unreasonable and dishonest.

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Posted
Why? Over what?

 

 

 

 

 

You will find that virtually every time someone tells us their SO requested a break, almost everyone has come back and said "Don't fall for it - 'break' = break-UP. "

 

This is no exception.

 

Don't keep him hanging there for your own comfort.

Him being there for you when you're ready to pick up 'where you left off' is for your convenience, not his.

You've tuned him into your 'soft place to fall when I'm ready for you'. Your 'back-up plan'.

 

If you're not in the right frame or state of mind to be in a relationship - then have the courage to sever ties and let him move on.

But hanging him out to dry in limbo, until you're done with this phase, is really unfair, unreasonable and dishonest.

 

Okay, first off we talked some of this out and we have decided to see each other every OTHER day instead of everyday. So it's not a break, its space. Second, I'm keeping him because we want to make this work, he's going to go to counseling with me. We aren't picking up where we left off either, we are getting through it together.

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