donitbig Posted December 12, 2012 Posted December 12, 2012 Hey everyone, Brand new to the forums and seeking advice as this is very unusual for me. Bare with me as I give a brief story on my situation. My best friends wife introduced me to a great friend of hers a few months ago. It was a blind date as my best friend recently moved out of state. Met the girl, and we clicked immediately. In fact, we moved really fast right from the get to, just an awesome fun time we had with each other. Throughout the "relationship", we were both on the same page as just having fun and not really looking for anything serious at this time. A little background on us- me, divorced, great terms with ex wife, wasn't ugly at all. Her, on the other hand, has/had severe issues with her previous marriage. Her husband was cheating on her before they even married, and during the whole time they were married. She stuck with it for 3 years despite this. She's been divorced for 18 months now. She's made great strides, but is hesitant to jump into anything. I get it, totally. So I'm really the first guy she's dated more than once since her divorce other than a couple of one time dates with a couple of other guys. I'm the first she's been with for this amount of time. As we progress, we continue to get to know each other, and end up spending a lot of our weekends together. Lots and lots of fun, and the sex is amazing, and lots of it. We've had chats about us, and while we haven't discussed being exclusive, neither of us has dated anyone else. She's also mentioned that she's scared of the feelings she's developed for me, and it sends a wall up. Blah, blah. We keep going. In a drunken stupor, I decide to open up beta style, and basically tell her how much she means, that I might be falling for her, etc. This freaked her out, and I was pissed because things were going good, and she's got issues which shes warned me about. We decide to keep going, and honestly after a few months of exclusive dating, I have developed strong feelings. 2 and a half weeks ago, we're out, and she says she needs to talk to me. I'm like, "oh crap, here we go". One of those talks. She admits to me that a good friend of hers and her husband want her to double date with an old mutual friend of all of theirs that has recently gone through a divorce. I flip out beta style-again. Usually, I'm very reserved with my feelings, and can keep a girl guessing. Anyways, I tell her that I appreciate her honesty, but she just f'd up a good thing. We leave a bar we're at, I take her to her car, and she goes home. She texts me the next day that we should probably stop because she doesn't want to hurt me as I've gotten into deep. Yadda yadda. I oblige, and immediately go No Contact. The following weekend after going a full week NC, I texted her a funny story that she would've appreciated after being out with a few friends enjoying some beers. I regretted it, but can't change what I did. She calls the next day (Sunday) and I'm totally nonchalant while talking to her. Talked for about 20 minutes, and then precede with NC again. Now, at this point, while i'm interested to see where things could go with us, I'm getting over her quick. However, this past Friday, I'm going out with my buds, and she texts me saying, "i got a massage today, and all I could think about was how I wish your hands were all over me." Oh, the weakness of an insatiable sex driven man. So, I respond half hr later or so, "great memory", and pretty much leave it at that. She's goes on dropping hints for me to go see her that night. I oblige despite the NC cause I know I'm gonna get some. And I do. I spend the night, and she's all lovey dovey, but neither one of us mentions anything about "us", and what little is said is on my part which I explained that the past 2 weeks have given me great clarity to which she doesn't respond but just kinda stares at me wanting me to explain, which I don't. I text her Saturday just to see what's up. She responds shes going out, and i'm like have fun! Sunday she texts me to see how i'm doing, and we exchange a couple of light texts. Back to NC. AND here's the problem. Best friend and wife are coming into town in a couple of weekends, and we all have been chomping to get together for a great time. I don't know what to do. I'm trying to really make her see what's shes missed and she has slowly reached out, but it's going to be akward with all 4 of us there not knowing where we're at. Advice please! How do I handle this situation. This is my best friend and his wife is also a great friend of mine. Sorry so long....... Thanks.
Recommended Posts