avon20 Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Just because a man has balls to ask a woman out and goes after what he wants does not mean she is going to be interested in him. There's other factors that determine whether or not a woman will be interested. Sometimes I get too shy to go after the women I want. But this is probably all a moot point since I don't even know for sure that she had interest in me to begin with. So why does a woman care if a man has balls to ask her out? If he has not even passed the physical attraction test then every other quality or flaw is moot. Looks do matter no matter if confidence is present or not. So she isn't going to care one way or the other that I did not have balls to pursue her and ask her out because she would have said no anyway. 1
CptSaveAho Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 (edited) Women aren't "wired" to lead... they're reaction to rejection is 1000xs worse then men's and they over analyze words and psych themselves out. They need a "leader" to lead them with actions and they will follow and cheerlead for you Time to grow a pair and become confident Edited December 10, 2012 by CptSaveAho 3
Author avon20 Posted December 10, 2012 Author Posted December 10, 2012 That's assuming that I have passed the physical attraction test first. Otherwise it is like buying new tires and polishing them up on a car that has a blown engine. The car is dead. It becomes a moot point whether I put the new tires on there or not. I am not going to drive it either way. Lack of confidence is not the only reason I would not have a chance with her. There are other factors. Some of those other factors make confidence a moot point. So again why put new tires on a vehicle that has a blown engine?
Author avon20 Posted December 10, 2012 Author Posted December 10, 2012 By the way I have a perfect right to live like a hermit and never pursue the women I want. It isn't like I am hurting anybody. I am certainly not hurting women. They could care less that I am hiding from them like a hermit in fear. It does not effect them at all.
CptSaveAho Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Oh whatever... Physical attraction is BS... if you can crush with an amazing personality... it doesnt matter what you look like.... Look at some of the great pua's out there, some are hideous and pulling amazing hot women.... Physical attraction is a male to female thing... women will talk all this hype about being physically attracted to someone but they really want someone that's Emotionally Attractive 2
mortensorchid Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 I can tell you why I would want the man to ask me out rather than the other way around. Quite honestly, when it's been me (the woman) asking a man for something, I find myself being in the driver's seat the entire time we are together. If he does the asking, he feels that he is in command. There is a difference, subtle yet prominent when one party asks the other, depending on which gender it is. Some guys will say they like it when women chase them or do the asking and whatnot, but they really don't. Some will argue "he's shy". True, he may be, but he is not shy about other things (business, interests, etc.). If he is shy about those things as well, then you have a weak person who is uninterested in most things (one of them being you) and you don't want to have anything to do with him anyway. SO that's why I like it when the man takes the initiative. THis is the message that I am getting from him when he does so. 1
PJKino Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 It simply has to do with not wanting rejection and their fragile egos bruised moreso then the psychoanalyzing of why its better for a man to do which is just a cover up
Harradin Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Just because a man has balls to ask a woman out and goes after what he wants does not mean she is going to be interested in him. I don't really have much experience of love but a tactic I used in the past when I had a crush I couldn't get rid of (only had 1 real crush when I was 11, I used to be emotionless and not be able to attach but at that age its just puppy love.) I knew she wasn't interested, but I still fancied her. So to get over her I decided that the best thing to do was to tell her how I feel and ask her out. I KNEW she'd say no, she did say no and was nice about it but I got over her, and I didn't fancy her any more within a couple of days after I asked her out so I essentially got closure and moved on. Looking back, I was surprised I had even thought of that idea when I was 11 to be honest but it worked a treat! So I guess moral of the story is sometimes its not about what the reaction is or whether the girl is interested or not, you do it to get closure and move on. 3
ThaWholigan Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 I don't really have much experience of love but a tactic I used in the past when I had a crush I couldn't get rid of (only had 1 real crush when I was 11, I used to be emotionless and not be able to attach but at that age its just puppy love.) I knew she wasn't interested, but I still fancied her. So to get over her I decided that the best thing to do was to tell her how I feel and ask her out. I KNEW she'd say no, she did say no and was nice about it but I got over her, and I didn't fancy her any more within a couple of days after I asked her out so I essentially got closure and moved on. Looking back, I was surprised I had even thought of that idea when I was 11 to be honest but it worked a treat! So I guess moral of the story is sometimes its not about what the reaction is or whether the girl is interested or not, you do it to get closure and move on. Precisely. 1
kaylan Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Oh whatever... Physical attraction is BS... if you can crush with an amazing personality... it doesnt matter what you look like.... Look at some of the great pua's out there, some are hideous and pulling amazing hot women.... Physical attraction is a male to female thing... women will talk all this hype about being physically attracted to someone but they really want someone that's Emotionally Attractive So false. If physical attraction meant nothing to a woman, I wouldnt have the girl Im seeing now, constantly complimenting me based on my physical attributes. Sure we connect outside of the sex realm...but her being very physically attracted to me is a big part of why shes into me based on what Im experiencing right now. I do treat her very well outside of the bedroom, but I do know she has the super hots for me too.
Mme. Chaucer Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Isn't the possession of "balls" a defining feature of being a man? All those I've ever dated had some ... 1
SteveC80 Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 So false. If physical attraction meant nothing to a woman, I wouldnt have the girl Im seeing now, constantly complimenting me based on my physical attributes. Sure we connect outside of the sex realm...but her being very physically attracted to me is a big part of why shes into me based on what Im experiencing right now. I do treat her very well outside of the bedroom, but I do know she has the super hots for me too. I agree i think unattractive men tell themselves that to feel better Women have come up too me at lounges/clubs/bars and tried to kiss me out of nowhere and its not because of my glowing personality its because they were attracted to me Nowadays since its less taboo for women to be loose we see just how horny and controlled by their hormones women can be even moreso then men at times As a good looking dude its like shootig nfish in a barrel as long as you dont f it up 1
carhill Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Why Women Want Men Who Have Balls to Ask Them Out? Because you'll need them (balls) for life. If you're going to lose them at any point, it's far better to do so when alone. Trust me. Hurdles exist (passing the physical attractiveness hurdle; passing the 'balls to ask her out' hurdle, etc) to test the runner. If you trip over any of them and fall on your face, you're out. Watch any track and field event for examples. Good luck.
jcrew11 Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 There are ways to "gain trust and attraction" of women "through shared interests, hobbies, social proof from friends" besides just looks. If you are doing "cold approach" which is a 10 minute conversation, you need to do it in a place that makes you looks good, safe, and interesting. Meet women in places that can show that you are a "good guy" like at organic grocery stores, the gym, farmer's market, cooking classes, yoga class, the library, etc. Bring along a cute puppy or dog and walk it around places with hot women. Go to church to meet women. Bring along a friend who can talk you up, make you look good and not like some weird loner. Meet women online, there are also girls that like RPG and Warcraft, Anime, comic books, etc.
ScreamingTrees Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Meet women online, there are also girls that like RPG and Warcraft, Anime, comic books, etc. As if every guy that struggles with women is into this ****. I'm not interested in any of those things. And most guys play video games. That's my experience, that a great majority of guys do or have played vidya gems at some point in their life, regardless of them actually looking and acting like it. 1
Ross MwcFan Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Women aren't "wired" to lead... they're reaction to rejection is 1000xs worse then men's and they over analyze words and psych themselves out. They need a "leader" to lead them with actions and they will follow and cheerlead for you Time to grow a pair and become confident How does a guy grow a pair?
PJKino Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 This is what happens when little boys don't have fathers when they are growing up. WHy is it specficaly a mans job to do something? seems kind of putting people in a box to me Plus women seem to take offense when they are expected to do ceretain things just becasue of their gender yet have no problems doing it to men
ThaWholigan Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 How does a guy grow a pair? By pushing himself out of his comfort zone continuously - even if he is scared. 5
ScreamingTrees Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 How does a guy grow a pair? If you can just talk to girls and bull**** in the moment without thinking about asking her out or not, you might be surprised when you find yourself in a good situation to be asking a girl for her number. If you hold so much weight in every little subtle interaction, you're going to be an awkward tense mess. Once you lift the weight off of things like smiling and saying "hello!" it's really an eye-opener how silly you were being. Practice on strangers, don't have to be cute girls your age, just people in general.. Most of them will have the same reaction, mostly positive, maybe neutral, barely any negative (unless they're all weirdos)... A cute girl will not react to simple gestures any differently, because she's no different than them.
CptSaveAho Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 (edited) So false. If physical attraction meant nothing to a woman, I wouldnt have the girl Im seeing now, constantly complimenting me based on my physical attributes. Sure we connect outside of the sex realm...but her being very physically attracted to me is a big part of why shes into me based on what Im experiencing right now. I do treat her very well outside of the bedroom, but I do know she has the super hots for me too. infatuation... i read your story that you supermoderated You are dating a GIGS girl, have fun with that I don't date girls that compliment me all the time.... projection of insecurity Women complain about the same things, the guys that compliment them all the time.... (guys become infatuated/attached... insecure too quick) Edited December 10, 2012 by CptSaveAho 1
IT Geek Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Oh whatever... Physical attraction is BS... if you can crush with an amazing personality... it doesnt matter what you look like.... No, THAT is BS. If there is no physical attraction you are automatically dismissed as a potential mate, regardless of the personality.
IT Geek Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 I knew she wasn't interested, but I still fancied her. So to get over her I decided that the best thing to do was to tell her how I feel and ask her out. I KNEW she'd say no, she did say no and was nice about it but I got over her, and I didn't fancy her any more within a couple of days after I asked her out so I essentially got closure and moved on. However, if a person of interest is in the same social circle as you and the above method is put into play, it can (and probably will) cause awkwardness in the future. I'm in the same situation but haven't acted on it because she'll say no and then there would be this strange tension between us. I value her friendship too much to do that.
grkBoy Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 Just because a man has balls to ask a woman out and goes after what he wants does not mean she is going to be interested in him. There's other factors that determine whether or not a woman will be interested. Sometimes I get too shy to go after the women I want. But this is probably all a moot point since I don't even know for sure that she had interest in me to begin with. So why does a woman care if a man has balls to ask her out? If he has not even passed the physical attraction test then every other quality or flaw is moot. Looks do matter no matter if confidence is present or not. So she isn't going to care one way or the other that I did not have balls to pursue her and ask her out because she would have said no anyway. That kind of comment from women is really saying that if a guy they DO find physically and intellectually attractive does not have the backbone to take on the risk of asking her out...then she will move on. She will not ask him out or chase him. When it's a guy she's not physically and/or intellectually attracted to, she's more hoping that guy DOESN'T have the backbone to ask her out...but more that he doesn't bother her. You'll know a woman is interested when she's making plenty of effort to be around you and be available for you. So you show up to a party she's at, and she'll come say hi to you and hang around with you most of the night. Too many guys, especially "nice guys" will see way less contact, but think her being cordial and friendly is a sign of interest. "She didn't avoid me all night, and she said hello back...she might be interested!" The real work is keeping your head on straight so you'll know genuine interest VS just being friendly.
PJKino Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 he doesn't bother her. Too many guys, especially "nice guys" will see way less contact, but think her being cordial and friendly is a sign of interest. "She didn't avoid me all night, and she said hello back...she might be interested!" The real work is keeping your head on straight so you'll know genuine interest VS just being friendly. For some of us we never get signs of interest at all so we have to take a shot at any slight signs even if its nothing I wait for obvious signs probably too much and hardly ever approach women becasue i never get them 1
grkBoy Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 For some of us we never get signs of interest at all so we have to take a shot at any slight signs even if its nothing I wait for obvious signs probably too much and hardly ever approach women becasue i never get them But that's why you fail over and over. I speak from experience mind you. I've done this in my past...and failed over and over. I could have easily jumped on a board and ridiculed women, claiming they won't give me a chance...but the reality I found is I wasn't what they wanted, plain and simple. I didn't look nor act like the man they would date and have a RL with. Maybe they thought I was sweet, friendly, and non-threatening, but I didn't incite them into thinking "I want him". If you have a hard time holding a conversation with a woman, or you see every woman you talk to is drooling over some "better" guy in the room...then you see what you have to do. You have to work on your social skills and even your physical appearance. That or leave that room/area and go into other areas where you might meet women who would want you "as is". Bear in mind things ONLY changed for me when I took more interest in my physical self and my social skills. When I hit the gym and lost some weight and learned to dress better. When I was able to hold conversations with intelligent women AND walk away from the shallow/brainless women who can only talk about celebrities and gossip. When I would stop killing myself to get a girl who is "slightly interested" to be my girlfriend...and instead just do my thing and let her do some of the work, or be dropped. 3
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