somedude81 Posted December 9, 2012 Posted December 9, 2012 Well, it's all about saying the right thing in the right moment... and doing it in a nice, non-forward way in the beginning. If you only behave as a friend, you'll get a friend only. You have to activate the girl's sexuality in a non-threatening way if you want something to develop. The bold is my number 1 problem with women. I don't have a clue how to do that, and hence I'm a 31 year old guy whose never had a girlfriend. For some reason, I can only think of ways to activate a girls sexuality by not doing it at all or by being way to forward and creepy. Basically my volume nob is broken and I can only do Mute and Very Loud.
Overthirtymale Posted December 9, 2012 Posted December 9, 2012 this is such bull i don't even know where to begin. exiciting, intellectually powerful, attractive may as well be greek god. just 99.9% of nice guys lack at least one of those qualities. i'm in my 30s and never been on a date and the one way i'll ever get laid is to pay for it. sure i'm bitter and angry and spitful now but i haven't always been this way. it was very gradual over time. Dude you are letting women control your life too much. You run around with the idea that you need a woman to make you happy is a huge turn off in itself. Find hobbies you enjoy, splurge on stuff, live selfish. If you are not happy with yourself why would anyone want to be with you. Being single IS a lot better than you think.
AD1980 Posted December 9, 2012 Posted December 9, 2012 hmm... there's a difference between being a good guy with no MALE attractive sexual energy whatsoever and a good guy who can be exciting, intellectually powerful and attractive (for her, not necessarily a Greek god). Most girls won't like a nice guy who lacks these qualities that attract her, yes. If you want the girl to really fall for you, the best thing is to have both. I personally turned down guys who were nice and had no male energy. It's probably biological, we need a cave man that shows he needs us in a biological level. But we also need a guy who is there for us and we can count on = a good guy. The problem is you guys think you can only be either 1) a good guy; 2) a jerk who doesn't care about her feelings and tries to get laid. Guys who have are both nice and are firm, have a healthy sexual energy and overall nice attitude, get the girl. I've had meaningful relationships with guys like that, they are what girls dream of and so hard to find. So no, it's not that we like jerks. We like nice guys with a healthy male energy. Not easy as a man to say ok im just gonna up my level of attractive sexual energy or even know what that means or how to Its such an intangible thing
edgygirl Posted December 9, 2012 Posted December 9, 2012 Man... watch some romantic comedies. Think John Cusack saying with puppy eyes: "wow, you have the cutest smile ever". And no, you don't have to look as good as him. Or: "nice outfit, you look great". Keep in mind: everyone likes compliments If she is not receptive at all after a few times, move on, yes. There's this guy on my facebook that I'm not particularly interested in. He's not physically my type per se, and he's a little too young for me. But every time he sees a clever post from me, he sends me a message complimenting my brains, as well as my looks, saying I'm perfect and he would love to get a chance with me, etc. I can't help but thinking about him in a sexual/relationship manner, cause HE caused it in me by the things he keeps saying. It doesn't mean I will give him a chance yet, but he creates this sexual tension that does make me think about him like that. And who knows, I might one day give him a chance. lol. 1
grkBoy Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 is a jerk, dumb, *******, player, a failure or some other derogatory term according to the dudes here that are supposedly nice, a good guy, smarter, successful, "a quality" guy. Or maybe those guys just aren't what they like to think they are? I am just really tired of "nice guys" No dude, when you get older and "women are done playing around with all the jerks".... if you're still the way you are, you're still not going to get the girl, unless it's some chick that will completely use you up lol. Agreed. It's amazing how many men and even women think their troubles in dating are all about their "niceness". Yet they either still won't accept their lack of fashion, personality, confidence, or the bad attitude thry carry. Even the good looking ones can't seem to figure out how their consistent bad choices combined with naïveté hurts them every time. 2
Under The Radar Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 The bold is my number 1 problem with women. I don't have a clue how to do that, and hence I'm a 31 year old guy whose never had a girlfriend. For some reason, I can only think of ways to activate a girls sexuality by not doing it at all or by being way to forward and creepy. Basically my volume nob is broken and I can only do Mute and Very Loud. Somedude81, If I EVER hear you refer to yourself as "Creepy" again I'm going to "Crawl" into my computer monitor and give you an unforgettable throttling ! You may be a lot of things, including inexperienced, but you are not CREEPY. Now, please carry on in a NON-CREEPY manner .
El Brujo Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 is a jerk, dumb, *******, player, a failure or some other derogatory term according to the dudes here that are supposedly nice, a good guy, smarter, successful, "a quality" guy. Or maybe those guys just aren't what they like to think they are? I am just really tired of "nice guys" No dude, when you get older and "women are done playing around with all the jerks".... if you're still the way you are, you're still not going to get the girl, unless it's some chick that will completely use you up lol. When everyone else's grass looks greener, plant cactus.
GoodOnPaper Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 If this was true, you wouldn't see ugly men married in happy relationships. I don't think this argument is as valid as it may appear on the surface. I imagine that many of these "ugly" men were choosing between a committed relationship and a long dry spell whereas guys who are more successful at dating are deciding which among several women to commit to. Very different propositions.
ThaWholigan Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 I don't think this argument is as valid as it may appear on the surface. I imagine that many of these "ugly" men were choosing between a committed relationship and a long dry spell whereas guys who are more successful at dating are deciding which among several women to commit to. Very different propositions. That which you imagine may be just that - an imagination rather than a general rule. Tis possible, I hear you. But I think guys cling to these notions to make themselves feel better rather than perhaps try to figure out how to actually be the guy who is able to attract women. The problem is you guys all have rebuttals for why things are bad for you that never involve what you can do as a solution that benefits you. (general you). For the record, there are "ugly" guys who do just fine with women. And they don't necessarily have to be rich either.
xxoo Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 I've been told that I should tell girls that I think they're pretty and told that I shouldn't. You should. Some women won't appreciate it. Forget them. Focus on the ones whose faces lights up. Compliment her again the next time you see her, and build up from there, getting bolder each time. As long as she has a positive reaction, escalate each time. 2
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