He postponed our first date

[bolase]

With no excuse, just a text saying he has to cancel and offering a couple of dates to reschedule.

 

I am feeling a bit muted. Anyway, I met this guy a while ago, he asked for my number and we made a plan, then I got sick and cancelled on HIM, before I eventually got in touch and we made the current plan!

 

So I have done the same but I had, and offered a legit excuse.

 

What is the best response?

[lovesick1]

He offered you dates, that means he is still interested. Take him up on whatever date is best for you then when you guys do go out make a joke about how you finally got to go out- and if it goes well at the end of the night you can say-"Im really glad we finally got to go out :)"

[dasein]

Jeebus I hate texts. If it's anything that causes more misunderstandings, rudeness and hurt feelings here and elsewhere than text culture, I don't know what it is.

 

We could conjecture that he doesn't have a good excuse, so chose the cowardly path with the text. But in texty land that's all it is, conjecture.

 

In your shoes, I'd not respond to any more texts until he calls you with an explanation and apology. Listen to it carefully, don't get mad or sound annoyed, play it cool, and maybe it was honest. Personally, if it was a BBD variety of excuse or a lame cover on BBD, I'd move on to other options. But I'm a hardass on the BBD crowd admittedly. If you believe his excuse and apology, then one more try. Good luck.

[bolase]

Thanks both.. I would hardly expect him to call when he texted (with 5h to go) both apologizing and offering 2 other options though..

[dasein]

Well, would expect a call regardless in your shoes. You didn't mention the apology in the OP or I missed it, which makes it some better, but, still in conjecture land, I think he was being sly by suggesting the two alt plans in an attempt to deflect from him not having a good excuse for the cancellation. Again, am an old grouch on this kind of thing, if you choose to let this slide it wouldn't be a great big deal. Would not accept either alt plan in a text reply though, maybe something like, "call me when you get a chance" and leave the ball in his court.

[bolase]

I agree. I can't do those options he gave anyway so have told him that and said I would like to meet up, so the ball's in his court.

[NoMoreJerks]

With no excuse, just a text saying he has to cancel and offering a couple of dates to reschedule.

 

I am feeling a bit muted. Anyway, I met this guy a while ago, he asked for my number and we made a plan, then I got sick and cancelled on HIM, before I eventually got in touch and we made the current plan!

 

So I have done the same but I had, and offered a legit excuse.

 

What is the best response?

I'd be extremely displeased with anyone who tries to cancel on me, especially if done last minute, and without a convincing excuse. However, I would give him one more chance -- after taking a day or two to think about it. I wouldn't respond for at least a day, though, or if I do, I would respond in a way that conveys my displeasure (not to an extreme level, though). I'd just say: "yeah, no problem, some other time, I guess." That's sort of my way of moving on to the next person, unless he comes back after that mssg and is rather insistent on going on a date.

[phineas]

I don't even respond to flake texts unless they offer to reschedule.

also I don't set up many meets or dates for the weekend until I know the person is actually interested & sticking around because I really hate getting a baby-sitter on the weekend only to have someone flake on me last min.

[bolase]

He did offer to reschedule on 2 dates that I can't make...so I played it cool and said before x date would be cool, but now I might have left it completely and made myself too difficult to date...dunno.

[mortensorchid]

Try one more time, if either one cancels it wasn't meant to be.