Facebook backup plan? From off-line to online and back

[sweetjasmine]

Either way, it just seems creepy friending somebody and then asking them out right away. I wonder if girls think about that and wonder why the guy just didn't ask her out when they saw each other.

 

I don't think it's creepy. And she found you and friended you, first. Why not send her a message? If you feel really weird making the first message a date invite, send something a little flirty and then ask her out.

[iris219]

So you suggest I chat to her first? That sounds better than a random date invite.

 

As for why I'm asking out women on facebook. It's because school doesn't go back until the end of January and even then there is a huge chance I'll never see them again. If the girl isn't a business major, I would probably never run into her on campus.

 

I disagree about having chat conversations, but that's up to you. That wouldn't appeal to me at all. Something short like a message that asks her how she's been/what she's been up to would be appropriate. When/if she responds to that message, then ask her out.

[Nightsky]

ask her out, the one who friended you. Just do it.

[veggirl]

SD chat with her and ask her out IN that chat! You don't have to start off with it but do it like when you have a nice convo going.

[somedude81]

She replied!

 

 

"LOLLLL

 

 

Love that movie."

 

 

Such a non-answer

[somedude81]

I sent her a message that I laugh at what I wrote when I see and then talked a little bit about the move.

 

Now I'm thinking about what my next message should be.

 

Something like.

 

"BTW that was such a non-answer "

 

And then leave it up to her.

 

At this point I'm very sure it's a no but I want her to say it. Without feeling bad for saying it. Which is probably why she didn't turn me down right away.

 

Or I can say,

 

"Ha you didn't say no

 

What's the number to that huge thing you call a phone"

 

 

(Her phone is basically a 7 inch tablet)

Edited December 12, 2012 by somedude81

[veggirl]

"Ha you didn't say no

What's the number to that huge thing you call a phone"

 

That's funny

tell us what happens when you chat the girl that added you.

[somedude81]

That's funny

Good enough for me and I sent it.

 

Odds are I'm going to get a very polite rejection.

 

 

tell us what happens when you chat the girl that added you.

I need to send her a message. I should also be studying for my last final.

 

Arg priorities

[c57dood]

I sent her a message that I laugh at what I wrote when I see and then talked a little bit about the move.

 

Now I'm thinking about what my next message should be.

 

Something like.

 

"BTW that was such a non-answer "

 

And then leave it up to her.

 

At this point I'm very sure it's a no but I want her to say it. Without feeling bad for saying it. Which is probably why she didn't turn me down right away.

 

Or I can say,

 

"Ha you didn't say no

 

What's the number to that huge thing you call a phone"

 

 

(Her phone is basically a 7 inch tablet)

 

Holy **** dude, you are WASTING so much time worrying about these chicks! Seriously, if you would've just looked her in the eye and asked her out to do something fun, something creative, and gotten her response, you wouldn't be all wishy washy like you are now.

 

I'm not a Don Juan, but the only times I've surely KNOWN what's going on is by looking her directly in the eyes and asking her out. Some say yes, some say no. The no's, they do sting a little bit, but like I said it's like getting slapped in the face. It stings for a bit but then you heal up. You're just making this harder than it should be.

 

So what if you're the 46th guy to ask her out? If she says yes, then score! You landed a date with a highly desired woman. "Congratulations, you're our 10,000th customer!"

 

Also, you are probably grossly overestimating how many times these girls get asked out. Most women, even if they aren't interested in you and say no, are simply flattered by being asked out directly.

 

You got to stop complicating it so much. You're in a salsa dancing class, there's so much opportunity.

[somedude81]

Holy **** dude, you are WASTING so much time worrying about these chicks! Seriously, if you would've just looked her in the eye and asked her out to do something fun, something creative, and gotten her response, you wouldn't be all wishy washy like you are now.

 

I'm not a Don Juan, but the only times I've surely KNOWN what's going on is by looking her directly in the eyes and asking her out. Some say yes, some say no. The no's, they do sting a little bit, but like I said it's like getting slapped in the face. It stings for a bit but then you heal up. You're just making this harder than it should be.

 

So what if you're the 46th guy to ask her out? If she says yes, then score! You landed a date with a highly desired woman. "Congratulations, you're our 10,000th customer!"

 

Also, you are probably grossly overestimating how many times these girls get asked out. Most women, even if they aren't interested in you and say no, are simply flattered by being asked out directly.

 

You got to stop complicating it so much. You're in a salsa dancing class, there's so much opportunity.

The salsa class ended last week. That's why I'm doing it on FB now.

 

Yes I should have asked them out in-person and that's actually what I prefer, but I screwed up and now I can't do that anymore.

[c57dood]

The salsa class ended last week. That's why I'm doing it on FB now.

 

Yes I should have asked them out in-person and that's actually what I prefer, but I screwed up and now I can't do that anymore.

 

I'm not trying to put your down or make myself look better, but your chances will go up if you act like the internet didn't exist, trust me. If you missed your chance with these women, there will be more. There's always more.

[ColdEggNog]

Hey somedude!

 

Remember me?

 

I still keep up with your posts, and I just stopped by and wanted to let you know that I'm really proud of how far along you've come since we've last spoke (July or so?) It's great to see you're actively making moves now, flirting with women from your class, etc. Who cares if it's on facebook right now? Start there, and before you know it asking them out in person will be second nature for you.

 

Keep it up!

[somedude81]

Sigh.

 

No reply from that girl. I sent the message a few days ago and while I was sending a message to somebody else, I saw that this girl had "seen" the message shortly after I wrote it. So she chose not to respond. I'm not surprised at all and odds are she would have turned me down if I asked her in person. Never had a chance and I'll never contact her again.

 

It's great to be me.

 

Edit:

 

For some reason this really broke my spirit. I know I didn't have a chance but I guess I still had hope. I should have known better that this would never work. Just another mistake not to make again. Maybe after making 37 thousand more, I can finally get a win.

Edited December 15, 2012 by somedude81

[edgygirl]

So there's this guy, 32 yo, friended me, we never met IRL, and he keeps hitting on me for probably 3 months now, all through fb. It's not common in my age group for people to do it so I find it funny.

 

At first I thought I would never ever go on a date with this guy, he's kind of cute, but not my type. But he keeps sending me these cute messages, very upbeat and funny, 1-2 times a week. Just asking me how I'm doing, what did I do over a certain holiday and so on. He keeps complimenting posts I make saying how they are witty. He keeps saying how I'm perfect because I have the brains and the looks. And that he doesn't care about my age etc.

 

He's kind of growing on me for his cuteness and upbeat messages although I constantly tell him we should not go on a date. He doesn't give up, and he keeps going, in a fun non-creepy way that does not turn me off.

 

Persistence and consistency can pay off. I am a little curious about meeting him now even if just to have one drink or so. He seems fun and super friendly. And I like it that he's daring and doesn't seem afraid of getting a no. He laughs at himself and makes thing seem light.

 

Just thought I'd put it out there to give you an example of how things can work even if it doesn't seem like that sometimes

[ThaWholigan]

Sigh.

 

No reply from that girl. I sent the message a few days ago and while I was sending a message to somebody else, I saw that this girl had "seen" the message shortly after I wrote it. So she chose not to respond. I'm not surprised at all and odds are she would have turned me down if I asked her in person. Never had a chance and I'll never contact her again.

 

It's great to be me.

 

Edit:

 

For some reason this really broke my spirit. I know I didn't have a chance but I guess I still had hope. I should have known better that this would never work. Just another mistake not to make again. Maybe after making 37 thousand more, I can finally get a win.

Don't let it break you! It happens even to the best of us believe it or not.

[MrCastle]

Haven't read the previous pages but I suggest you just send them a picture of your dong.

 

Tastefully of course, make sure the lighting is right and photoshop any imperfections you may have on your member.

 

Also, if you're lacking, stretch the picture both horizontally and vertically to make it look bigger.

 

I see no downside to this plan.

 

Title the subject "Penis" and then attach the picture to the message. If you want to include text, write "This is a picture of my penis".

 

Good luck.

[somedude81]

So there's this guy, 32 yo, friended me, we never met IRL, and he keeps hitting on me for probably 3 months now, all through fb. It's not common in my age group for people to do it so I find it funny.

 

At first I thought I would never ever go on a date with this guy, he's kind of cute, but not my type. But he keeps sending me these cute messages, very upbeat and funny, 1-2 times a week. Just asking me how I'm doing, what did I do over a certain holiday and so on. He keeps complimenting posts I make saying how they are witty. He keeps saying how I'm perfect because I have the brains and the looks. And that he doesn't care about my age etc.

 

He's kind of growing on me for his cuteness and upbeat messages although I constantly tell him we should not go on a date. He doesn't give up, and he keeps going, in a fun non-creepy way that does not turn me off.

 

Persistence and consistency can pay off. I am a little curious about meeting him now even if just to have one drink or so. He seems fun and super friendly. And I like it that he's daring and doesn't seem afraid of getting a no. He laughs at himself and makes thing seem light.

 

Just thought I'd put it out there to give you an example of how things can work even if it doesn't seem like that sometimes

During this time did you ignore the messages where he asked you out, or were you dancing around them talking about other things?

 

Since this girl hasn't replied to the message I sent several days ago, and I knew she read that because FB told me, it seems that the only thing I can do is forget about her.

[edgygirl]

So this guy strategy is he only messages me when he knows I'm online - probably when I post or "like" something, as I am never signed on on chat mode.

 

So when he messages me through messages there, he used it as a IM thing, saying What's up, how is Channukah going, and then I usually do respond and we keep talking. Then he always hints on meeting for a drink and I always laugh saying he's too young. He doesn't take it badly and makes jokes about it as in "I can learn about Ronald Reagan administration or whatever you think I need to catch up".

 

Honestly I think the best thing is to try and get in chatty mode with someone mainly through some sort of chat service and then win by making them slightly curious about you either by being funny or nice or whatever.

 

His last first message was "How's my sexy fantasy girl?" and I didn't get offended or creeped out by it. I got used to him being a funny guy although he prob meant it. haha. Just be playful and make things light.

 

Flatter is always good too. He keeps saying how hot I am and well it's not bad to hear

 

During this time did you ignore the messages where he asked you out, or were you dancing around them talking about other things?

 

Since this girl hasn't replied to the message I sent several days ago, and I knew she read that because FB told me, it seems that the only thing I can do is forget about her.

[somedude81]

So this guy strategy is he only messages me when he knows I'm online - probably when I post or "like" something, as I am never signed on on chat mode.

 

So when he messages me through messages there, he used it as a IM thing, saying What's up, how is Channukah going, and then I usually do respond and we keep talking. Then he always hints on meeting for a drink and I always laugh saying he's too young. He doesn't take it badly and makes jokes about it as in "I can learn about Ronald Reagan administration or whatever you think I need to catch up".

 

Honestly I think the best thing is to try and get in chatty mode with someone mainly through some sort of chat service and then win by making them slightly curious about you either by being funny or nice or whatever.

 

His last first message was "How's my sexy fantasy girl?" and I didn't get offended or creeped out by it. I got used to him being a funny guy although he prob meant it. haha. Just be playful and make things light.

 

Flatter is always good too. He keeps saying how hot I am and well it's not bad to hear

Hmm, that's pretty clever.

 

The first time we chatted, she was actually online when I sent her a message which I didn't know, and then we just chatted and I kept making her laugh. After that, we've exchagned a couple of messages but she wasn't online and the responses were hour if not a day apart.

 

Well I posted a video on her wall that she should enjoy and I'll see how she reacts.

[TheZebra]

 

For some reason this really broke my spirit. I know I didn't have a chance but I guess I still had hope. I should have known better that this would never work. Just another mistake not to make again. Maybe after making 37 thousand more, I can finally get a win.

 

Reading this made me so sad I don't think you made a mistake in your approach; try not to overthink it so much (this coming from the woman who overthinks EVERYTHING). Better to know now that she's not interested than after going out a bunch of times and her finally saying she has a bf or something, right?

[somedude81]

Reading this made me so sad I don't think you made a mistake in your approach; try not to overthink it so much (this coming from the woman who overthinks EVERYTHING). Better to know now that she's not interested than after going out a bunch of times and her finally saying she has a bf or something, right?

I much rather belive that I made a mistake, instead of thinking that there is actually something wrong with me.

[runner]

SD- you can also try framing this another way: ie, would you really want to go on a date with someone who was a bit 'meh' on her part ? trust me, the date would suck balls. and you'll be wishing she simply said no in the first place, or ignored you. save your time for a girl that actually wants to spend time with you.

 

but regardless, i agree with everyone else who told you to just do it; of which you did, so good for you. much better than not trying at all.

[Els]

I much rather belive that I made a mistake, instead of thinking that there is actually something wrong with me.

 

There are plenty of other possibilities that have absolutely nothing to do with YOU, such as:

 

1) You weren't her type. That is NOT the same as there being anything wrong with you.

2) She wasn't interested in dating at the moment or was already dating another guy but not yet in a committed R or hadn't yet announced it on FB.

[somedude81]

SD- you can also try framing this another way: ie, would you really want to go on a date with someone who was a bit

'meh' on her part ?

Considering I never get dates in the first place, absolutely.

trust me, the date would suck balls. and you'll be wishing she simply said no in the first place, or ignored you.

I don't exactly have high expectations for dates. Just actually being on a date with a girl that I think is fun, would be great.

save your time for a girl that actually wants to spend time with you.

She doesn't exist.

There are plenty of other possibilities that have absolutely nothing to do with YOU, such as:

 

1) You weren't her type. That is NOT the same as there being anything wrong with you.

2) She wasn't interested in dating at the moment or was already dating another guy but not yet in a committed R or hadn't yet announced it on FB.

I can't take any solace in the "you weren't her type" thing. I'm not anybodies type. Nobody has ever liked me and I've never gotten anything more than a glimmer of interest that I probably misinterpreted in the first place.

 

This is why my confidence is so low. And every time I try to see if I have a chance with somebody, I find out that I don't. All this does is make me less confident and make me more depressed.

[ThaWholigan]

Considering I never get dates in the first place, absolutely.

 

I don't exactly have high expectations for dates. Just actually being on a date with a girl that I think is fun, would be great.

She doesn't exist.

 

I can't take any solace in the "you weren't her type" thing. I'm not anybodies type. Nobody has ever liked me and I've never gotten anything more than a glimmer of interest that I probably misinterpreted in the first place.

 

This is why my confidence is so low. And every time I try to see if I have a chance with somebody, I find out that I don't. All this does is make me less confident and make me more depressed.

You actually have to stop saying these things SD. Seriously.

 

The more you keep saying them, the more they resonate with you, and the more you start to identify with those statements being an intrinsic part of you. Then it becomes harder to shake it off and become better.

 

The most important story is the story we tell ourselves.