Is she still interested in me or best to move on?

[Drive]

So in October, I attended a speed dating event and ended up meeting a girl I knew briefly in elementary school. This was the girl who I had the biggest crush on when I moved to the new school. We both ended going to different high schools afterwards and didn't see each until then.

 

When we chatted during the event, we both looked at each other and came up with the conclusion that we knew each other from somewhere. I had told her that I had a crush on her in school but I was too shy to talk to her at the time. She had blast hearing that then we both had a great time chatting and catching up on life once the event ended.

 

We also found out that we share the same group of friends but somehow never bumped into each other throughout the years.

 

The next few days later, we started to email/text each other to set up a coffee date the week following. The coffee date went very well. I could tell by her expression that she was really into me as well. She also told me that she really liked me in elementary and too bad nothing ever happened afterwards. We both had committed plans afterwards so we decided to end the date which lasted for two hours but it really flew by quickly.

 

While walking her to her car, I asked if we could go out on another date again which she agreed. I texted her a few days later to ask if she was available the following week. Our work schedule didn't really match up so we kept texting each other back weekly to arrange another date. We ended up setting up a second date end of the October.

 

A few hours prior to the date, she texted back apologizing that she doesn't feel so good and asked if we could reschedule. I told her that it was fine with me and hoped that she gets well. I also asked her to keep me posted when she feels better so we can meet up again.

 

She is a kindergarten teacher so chances of getting sick from her students is very high. I don't think that she would flake for any other reason if she wasn't interested.

 

Well it has been a month since I heard from her. Does this mean that she is really sick or too busy or perhaps not really interested at all?

 

Another thing to note is that she works as a tutor on the side as well volunteers so she does have a busy schedule. I do have an odd work schedule as well but it is flexible.

 

Thoughts?

 

This is the first time in many months that I felt a real connection between the two of us. I don't know if it was fate but chances of us meeting up again by chance was something that I feel that it is worth giving this a shot.

 

Should I continue to wait or just move on?

 

Thanks,

J

 

PS: My friends think that the balls is her court now for her to make the move. I didn't want to text her back and sound very clingy but is it worth texting her again?

Edited December 6, 2012 by Drive

[Ninjainpajamas]

Yeah....sounds like someone came into the picture or back into the picture, that's just way too long for someone to get back to you if they were interested.

 

There's really nothing you can do about this, sure you can message her but you'd like just get a vague message/excuse or no response, sucks too because you had a history and similar group of friends, you had a strong edge going into this however this is why if you meet a girl you like, you've got to keep up the consistency in dates, the next week you would have had to meet her and had another good second date and had a strong connection there.

 

You have to look at it this way...she's busy, there's probably someone else in the picture, normal stresses of life that can bog you down, it takes energy and effort trying to juggle many things and then contact you...so if there isn't a strong incentive and consistency in the beginning to build a decent bond...well it's harder to make you a priority, so it could have been a good thing, everything seemed to go well but you weren't able to root yourself in enough to give her that push, and if it was another guy then he probably already had some history or what not, she could have went to do the speed date thing as a way of getting over a guy, a lot of women date other men or do the whole "I don't need that man!" type hoorah to try and convince themselves they moved on, only to fall right back into the trap, after the emotions raised back up and the bravado has worn off of miss independent.

 

It was a good experience, unusual person to meet there but you've still got to leave it at that if she makes no effort to contact you back, you can't tip the scales or use it as leverage...if you start contacting her now it'll just make you look too interested and desperate, and the other guy that doesn't call or keep in contact drops her a line and she's all over it in a heart beat...but that's just the way it goes.

 

Sounds like another love interest to me, if not she'll contact you at some point wanting to reconnect and see how you're doing, but I think if you go all in now the odds aren't in your favor at all to win out and could seal you out for good.

 

Just keep dating other women at this point, the chances of her getting back to you...while not impossible, not high, because she would have at least made some kind of effort to keep in touch.

 

Nobody lets a good catch go by...unless they think they've got something better.

[Cutiepie1976]

I would contact her one more time then drop it. I doubt that she ever had much interest in a second date, but it's worth one more try in case your signals got crossed, always a possibility when two near strangers are getting together.

 

For the record, you can't tell how SHE felt on the first date. Most people are sociable either way. Seriously, who pouts and shuts down mid-date because you've seen enough and decided you don't like the person that way? Most people are going to make the best of it either way.

 

I determine whether a date likes me by his behavior AFTER the date, not during. Does he text and call me pretty regularly? Ask me on another date? Do we go on another date?

[truth_seeker]

She's a flake. There's either another guy or she has some issues floating in her head to just blow you off. I would forget her. If she were an adult, she would at the very least text you back to let you down easy. To ignore you hoping you will go away is such a loser thing to do. Now you know why she was at a speed dating event.

[Cutiepie1976]

...umm, he was at the speed dating event too!

 

Maligning others, assuming there must be another guy, and general bitterness when you think someone doesn't like you, serves no purpose!

[clia]

You haven't talked to her since the end of October?

 

Dude, you dropped the ball.

 

Whether she was sick or not, you really should have followed up within a week to try and set up another date. ("Keep me posted..." is lame. You follow up a few days or a week later and say "Do you want to go out on Saturday?")

 

At this point you don't have anything to lose by reaching out to her again, but don't be surprised if she declines or ignores you at this point.

[jcrew11]

She's not interested or is seeing other guys, perhaps wiht online dating.

 

You can give her a call or leave a voice-mail, but I doubt she'll get back to you.

 

If she's as good looking as you say, I'm sure she has a bunch of other guys calling her.