The only time personality matters.

[IT Geek]

No man wants the "intelligent" woman. We want the hot bimbo. We wants da redhead. We wants da redhead.

 

Intelligence is totally hot to me. I'd much rather have an intelligent "cute" nerdy brunette with glasses and a little meat on her bones than a skinny redhead bimbo.

[Mme. Chaucer]

Women make an instant "yes" or "no" decision based on looks as to whether or not they are interested in getting to know the guy enough to determine is he is suitable as a potential partner.

 

When you say stuff like that … you are not making a very good case for your intelligence OR personality.

[IT Geek]

Seriously, you are claiming to be able to not only read minds, but to be able to read the minds of every woman on this planet? Didn't you at least learn in your computer science PhD that mass telepathy is currently only a figment of science-fiction imagination? No, Professor X is not real.

 

Ok, let me rephrase. Women make an instant judgement call of "no" or "maybe" based on looks. Guys do it to. If you've ever seen someone and instantly dismissed them based on looks/appearance you are guilty.

[LittlePrince]

When you say stuff like that … you are not making a very good case for your intelligence OR personality.

Most people do make irreversible snap decisions on mating potential.

[Under The Radar]

When did "Creepy" become such a popular descriptor in the dating world by woman? It seems so overused and misused. I would almost attribute the term as offensive to men as guys calling woman "Manipulative Bitches".

 

A quick google search online yielded the following definition:

 

CREEPY: Producing a nervous shivery apprehension.

 

So, I am sure some women are meeting Freddy Kruger for coffee and donuts once in a while, but come on ...... it cannot possibly be THAT bad.

 

DISCLAIMER: To the best of my knowledge I have never been called or labeled creepy.

[LittlePrince]

When did "Creepy" become such a popular descriptor in the dating world by woman? It seems so overused and misused. I would almost attribute the term as offensive to men as guys calling woman "Manipulative Bitches".

 

A quick google search online yielded the following definition:

 

CREEPY: Producing a nervous shivery apprehension.

 

So, I am sure some women are meeting Freddy Kruger for coffee and donuts once in a while, but come on ...... it cannot possibly be THAT bad.

 

DISCLAIMER: To the best of my knowledge I have never been called or labeled creepy.

I've been called weird but yet that girl sometimes shows interest.

[Els]

Ok, let me rephrase. Women make an instant judgement call of "no" or "maybe" based on looks. Guys do it to. If you've ever seen someone and instantly dismissed them based on looks/appearance you are guilty.

 

Now that is a whole different issue. And of course we do and you do. What's your point? You do realize that what you said and what the OP said is an entirely different thing. If a woman gives an instant 'no' to 5% of men based on their looks and a 'maybe' to the others, what do you think would seal the deal for the other 95%? Oh, that's right....

[Mme. Chaucer]

Most people do make irreversible snap decisions on mating potential.

 

I agree that this happens often, but where I fall away is when guys insist it's all about "hotness."

 

There is a wide range of characteristics that can spark a feeling of instant connection (or the idea of potential connection). And, take my word for it, it's not usually "mating potential" that's on the minds of many women when we encounter men. It's more like a feeling of interest and attraction.

[Els]

When did "Creepy" become such a popular descriptor in the dating world by woman? It seems so overused and misused. I would almost attribute the term as offensive to men as guys calling woman "Manipulative Bitches".

 

A quick google search online yielded the following definition:

 

CREEPY: Producing a nervous shivery apprehension.

 

So, I am sure some women are meeting Freddy Kruger for coffee and donuts once in a while, but come on ...... it cannot possibly be THAT bad.

 

DISCLAIMER: To the best of my knowledge I have never been called or labeled creepy.

 

I don't know about other women, but the guys I describe as creepy actually do illicit nervous and unpleasant apprehension in me.

[Under The Radar]

I've been called weird but yet that girl sometimes shows interest.

 

See, to me weird isn't necessarily a negative observation. It can mean different or quirky, but creepy ......

 

I can be weird (as evidenced by some of my posts ), but it's not even close to the same thing as creepy. Like I said, the term is misused and abused.

 

Going by the definition I posted above (my horror movie reference) I think some of us guys have experienced a Friday the 13th like coffee meetup. Should we post on our twitter accounts for help while shoveling down our muffin and tea ?

[Mrlonelyone]

When did "Creepy" become such a popular descriptor in the dating world by woman? It seems so overused and misused. I would almost attribute the term as offensive to men as guys calling woman "Manipulative Bitches".

 

A quick google search online yielded the following definition:

 

CREEPY: Producing a nervous shivery apprehension.

 

So, I am sure some women are meeting Freddy Kruger for coffee and donuts once in a while, but come on ...... it cannot possibly be THAT bad.

 

DISCLAIMER: To the best of my knowledge I have never been called or labeled creepy.

 

I hate that too. It's like, with men, when they don't want to do you, they usually don't feel a need to devalue you to others. Women, it seems, often get a kick out of telling other people that a "creepy" guy hit on them. "Oh aren't I so choice I called someone else creepy".

 

The second most misused word would be friend. It's a sad time we live in where if Abbigail Adams wrote this to John it would mean she wants a divorce.

 

Do not grieve, my friend, my dearest friend. I am ready to go. And John, it will not be long. -Abbigail adams last recorded words.

[Mme. Chaucer]

CREEPY: Producing a nervous shivery apprehension.

 

 

It doesn't have to be horrifying. I remember clearly shaking the hand of a poet I admired greatly - and I was kind of in awe of being able to shake his hand - and it was the "clammy dead fish" handshake. Immediately - creeped out. No, I didn't fear the guy, or think he had any kind of evil or other intent towards me at all. This happened over 20 years ago and I still remember how I felt like pulling my hand back from that handshake. It was a visceral reaction.

 

Guys who, often through no fault of their own, do not have correct social behavior (like maybe they stare, or won't have eye contact when talking, or poor hygiene) can give the "creepy" vibe, even if they don't do anything threatening and are in fact super non threatening.

 

Just like a person CAN be a "manipulative bitch," a person CAN come off as "creepy." It's not a man - bashing term, nor is it a term for "ugly" men.

 

I certainly agree that it's hurtful.

[Mrlonelyone]

It doesn't have to be horrifying. I remember clearly shaking the hand of a poet I admired greatly - and I was kind of in awe of being able to shake his hand - and it was the "clammy dead fish" handshake. Immediately - creeped out. No, I didn't fear the guy, or think he had any kind of evil or other intent towards me at all. This happened over 20 years ago and I still remember how I felt like pulling my hand back from that handshake. It was a visceral reaction.

 

Guys who, often through no fault of their own, do not have correct social behavior (like maybe they stare, or won't have eye contact when talking, or poor hygiene) can give the "creepy" vibe, even if they don't do anything threatening and are in fact super non threatening.

 

Just like a person CAN be a "manipulative bitch," a person CAN come off as "creepy." It's not a man - bashing term, nor is it a term for "ugly" men.

 

I certainly agree that it's hurtful.

 

The thing is you are using the word correctly. Many young women have used it to mean, essentially, any man they are not attracted to making an advance at them.

 

Famous SNL sketch hits it right on the head.

[IT Geek]

Yea, I've been told I'm a "creeper" to my face before. Not exactly a good feeling.

[LittlePrince]

Yea, I've been told I'm a "creeper" to my face before. Not exactly a good feeling.

I'd ask them if they are auditioning for the Jersey Shore.

[maybealone]

Ok, let me rephrase. Women make an instant judgement call of "no" or "maybe" based on looks. Guys do it to. If you've ever seen someone and instantly dismissed them based on looks/appearance you are guilty.

 

That's more of a rewrite than a rephrase. Yes, of course we all dismiss a handful of people based on looks/appearance. But I would say that in any given week, seeing maybe a dozen or more men in my age range per day, there would maybe be two or three a week that would get an instant "no" from me. That's a pretty small percentage.

[dasein]

@Dasein

 

We can both likely agree that appearing stupid is something to definitely avoid when meeting new women.

[dasein]

It doesn't have to be horrifying. I remember clearly shaking the hand of a poet I admired greatly - and I was kind of in awe of being able to shake his hand - and it was the "clammy dead fish" handshake. Immediately - creeped out. No, I didn't fear the guy, or think he had any kind of evil or other intent towards me at all. This happened over 20 years ago and I still remember how I felt like pulling my hand back from that handshake. It was a visceral reaction.

 

Sorry but the above reads like, "I saw a fat woman walking by the other day, and this caused a visceral reaction in me of 'what a disgusting pig!'"

 

Can't agree more with other posters on the "creepy" term. It needs to go away yesterday in many of the ways it is overused by women as a broad descriptor of "men I don't fancy."

[Lonely Ronin]

Can't agree more with other posters on the "creepy" term. It needs to go away yesterday in many of the ways it is overused by women as a broad descriptor of "men I don't fancy."

 

I disagree with this, my female friends have a pretty clear definition of creeper. It's a guy that can't take a hint, or pushes when she isn't interested.

[dasein]

I disagree with this, my female friends have a pretty clear definition of creeper. It's a guy that can't take a hint, or pushes when she isn't interested.

 

Good for your friends, doesn't change the term being way overused by lots of women. The description pops up way more than it should here and elsewhere.

[Mme. Chaucer]

Sorry but the above reads like, "I saw a fat woman walking by the other day, and this caused a visceral reaction in me of 'what a disgusting pig!'"

 

 

So what? You're entitled to feel however you feel. I don't have to like it or feel that way myself.

 

Guys who make my skin crawl and inspire an impulse in me to get away are considered, by me, to be "creepy." Some of them might be dangerous, and most of them are probably just socially off and would be fine by me if I got to know them.

[dasein]

So what? You're entitled to feel however you feel. I don't have to like it or feel that way myself.

 

Guys who make my skin crawl and inspire an impulse in me to get away are considered, by me, to be "creepy." Some of them might be dangerous, and most of them are probably just socially off and would be fine by me if I got to know them.

 

Puhleeze, if a guy made a thread about "this fat woman I met was a pig" here, it would be chain reported and deleted or moved, he would be crucified in the interim, yet it's OK to call a guy "creepy" because he had a bad handshake? It's way overused and melodramatic here and elsewhere.

 

I recall a recent thread where a woman complained about a guy she had slept with after two months of texting and traveling to him to have sex, then told him it wasn't going to work. He called her twice more, tried to change her mind. Said how "disrespected" and "creeped out" she felt that this guy she slept with had the nerve to call her -twice- after being rejected. The peanut gallery hopped right on the "creepycreepy McCreeperson" bandwagon There have been hundreds of uses in this fashion here and it equates to calling a woman a "slag" or a "bitch" without significant, justifiable detail. You don't like it when posters do this, yet "creeper" is just fine when used hyperbolically?

[Mrlonelyone]

Puhleeze, if a guy made a thread about "this fat woman I met was a pig" here, it would be chain reported and deleted or moved, he would be crucified in the interim, yet it's OK to call a guy "creepy" because he had a bad handshake? It's way overused and melodramatic here and elsewhere.

 

I recall a recent thread where a woman complained about a guy she had slept with after two months of texting and traveling to him to have sex, then told him it wasn't going to work. He called her twice more, tried to change her mind. Said how "disrespected" and "creeped out" she felt that this guy she slept with had the nerve to call her -twice- after being rejected. The peanut gallery hopped right on the "creepycreepy McCreeperson" bandwagon There have been hundreds of uses in this fashion here and it equates to calling a woman a "slag" or a "bitch" without significant, justifiable detail. You don't like it when posters do this, yet "creeper" is just fine when used hyperbolically?

 

Yeah. That is one of the double standards of our society. Many of them favor men, but this one favors women.

 

People default to seeing women as victims and men as victimizers. Therefore, she was the victim of a horrible man who perhaps had a bad outing when it came to sex. She was the victim of him wanting to believe all that she said. She was the victim, and no one questions it. Afterall she is the fairer sex.

 

In general the man who ask a woman out and is rejected is seen as having somehow victimized the woman. How dare he think he's on my level (Until of course he's seen with another woman then quite often suddenly he's worthy.)

 

As for the pushing too hard thing etc. The bottom line is if the man is attractive enough he cannot push hard. Tom Brady can grab your boob or walk around in his underpants but when the other guy does it he gets a lawsuit.

[stillafool]

When a woman is choosing between two equally as good looking guys. If a woman can get a better looking guy than you, then you are dead in the water.

 

Women don't care about your personality as long as you are good looking. The only way to be perfect to women is by having best face possible, the crappier your face is the less perfect you are.

 

And, how does it work when a man is choosing between two equally goodlooking women?

[Under The Radar]

The thing is you are using the word correctly. Many young women have used it to mean, essentially, any man they are not attracted to making an advance at them.

 

Famous SNL sketch hits it right on the head.

 

 

Mrlonelyone,

 

This was funny as hell -Thanks for sharing the link. It garnered a lot of laughs. Everyone I showed it to thought it was hilarious .

 

On a side note, in honor of the "Creepiness Factor", I decided to let my clients (both male and female) in on this topic. We were "Cutting Up" in the gym the whole day tagging "that's creepy" onto the end of every statement. For Instance:

 

• Can you stop looking at me as you count out my pullups? It's VERY CREEPY and I feel uncomfortable.
  
• The way you put that barbell away was, honestly, REALLY CREEPY.
  
• Or, my personal favorite: Your squat form was Monumentally CREEPY today. Can you please squat in an attractive manner?
  

Anyway, you get the point. Everyone agreed that the term "Creepy" is definitely used in a gratuitous fashion - Especially in the dating world for derogatory reasons.