Andy119 Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 So I work with my ex and we see each other often because of this. We don't really talk much although a couple of weeks ago I was flirting with another girl at work and she suddenly started talking to me again and we talked a bit more over the next 2 weeks. some jokes here and there bit of teasing etc. Then she suddlny stopped talking to me again, I would say hi and she would just give me this look; lips pressed together but long and not angry (if you know what I mean?). The other day I was talking to another girl at work after which I caught my ex staring and repeatedly glancing at me. I've spoken to a cole of friends about this and they think it's jealousy, but she has a boyfriend and has apparently moved on so why would she be jealous?
itsmyfault Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Dude, She hasn't fully moved on, She is also hating the fact you are out there and other girls may be taking an interest in you. Keep doing what you are doing and ignore her.
flitzanu Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 if you're overly concerned about what your ex thinks, you aren't over her and shouldn't be trying to date other girls.
Author Andy119 Posted December 4, 2012 Author Posted December 4, 2012 if you're overly concerned about what your ex thinks, you aren't over her and shouldn't be trying to date other girls. I know I'm not over her, but I'm trying to be. If that makes sense?
flitzanu Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 I know I'm not over her, but I'm trying to be. If that makes sense? oh i understand, but that's not fair to any other girls you're talking to, is it?
Chi townD Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 (edited) Your Ex may be jealous. Yeah, she has a boyfriend now and when it started it was fun, new and romantic. But, since the romance has dies down, now the relationship is work. All relationships have this happen to it. Now, she see's you eyeing girls the same way you did with her. Flirt with girls the same way you did and she now is realizing that you're moving on without her. Basically, she doesn't want you, but she doesn't want anyone else to have you either. And Flitz is right. You're not being fair to the girls your flirting with. And how I know this is that you're flirting with girls at the same place your Ex works at! Out of all the places in the world to try to pick up chicks, you do it in front of her. At your work. Makes me think that you're doing so on purpose. Trying to make her jealous. Edited December 4, 2012 by Chi townD
cavalier99 Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 oh i understand, but that's not fair to any other girls you're talking to, is it? I agree. That a new relationship is not good at this time. However, im not sure what the problem with flirting is? Except that at work is probably a bad idea. Not fair to these girls? He isnt breaking any hearts. When it comes to getting more involved with anyone it would be another story and you would need to be up front about your situation etcetera. Im ok with flirting and even hooking up casually. Just not at work.
cavalier99 Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Ps fitzanu and chitownd. I love your posts! Just not with you on this one except for the work part being bad 2
Author Andy119 Posted December 4, 2012 Author Posted December 4, 2012 Your Ex may be jealous. Yeah, she has a boyfriend now and when it started it was fun, new and romantic. But, since the romance has dies down, now the relationship is work. All relationships have this happen to it. Now, she see's you eyeing girls the same way you did with her. Flirt with girls the same way you did and she now is realizing that you're moving on without her. Basically, she doesn't want you, but she doesn't want anyone else to have you either. And Flitz is right. You're not being fair to the girls your flirting with. And how I know this is that you're flirting with girls at the same place your Ex works at! Out of all the places in the world to try to pick up chicks, you do it in front of her. At your work. Makes me think that you're doing so on purpose. Trying to make her jealous. I wasn't doing it deliberately in front of her she just happened to walk past the irst time...twice! And the second time she was in the same room when the girl started talking to me. As for the work thing, I really don't get out much because of my job, unsociable hour, long shifts etc. So it's really one of very few options to meet anybody.
Chi townD Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 LOL!!!!! Okay " I didn't mean for it to happen!........twice...." Look, if you're telling me that the only social interaction you're getting with people is at work. Then, that's a problem. You're not making the positive changes in your life that I preach about over, and over.... You need to get out of your little box that's your life and include the world into your life. Have you gotten a new hobby? Have you planned, saved and when on an awesome trip that you've always dreamed of going on? I mean, that's how you get your revenge. Living a DAMN good life. Yeah, okay she's got a new boyfriend, but I think the type of healthy jealousy is her hearing that you're taking vacation time to go to Bermuda for a week.
Author Andy119 Posted December 4, 2012 Author Posted December 4, 2012 LOL!!!!! Okay " I didn't mean for it to happen!........twice...." Look, if you're telling me that the only social interaction you're getting with people is at work. Then, that's a problem. You're not making the positive changes in your life that I preach about over, and over.... You need to get out of your little box that's your life and include the world into your life. Have you gotten a new hobby? Have you planned, saved and when on an awesome trip that you've always dreamed of going on? I mean, that's how you get your revenge. Living a DAMN good life. Yeah, okay she's got a new boyfriend, but I think the type of healthy jealousy is her hearing that you're taking vacation time to go to Bermuda for a week. Believe whatever you want. Secondly I never said I wanted revenge and I am quite happy with my life
Chi townD Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Believe whatever you want. Secondly I never said I wanted revenge and I am quite happy with my life Okay...I understand that you are quite happy with your life............except for that pesky little torch you're still carrying for your Ex..... Dude, have you ever thought about applying for another job? because, honestly, I don't know how you're able to work side by side with your Ex and I can only imagine that it's holding up on your healing process.
flitzanu Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Believe whatever you want. Secondly I never said I wanted revenge and I am quite happy with my life also being defensive about how innocent your actions are doesn't support it being unintentional. i know you're not an idiot, and i know you're very well aware of the drama you're trying to create IF you actually dated another girl you work with, WHILE also working with your ex.
Author Andy119 Posted December 4, 2012 Author Posted December 4, 2012 Okay...I understand that you are quite happy with your life............except for that pesky little torch you're still carrying for your Ex..... Dude, have you ever thought about applying for another job? because, honestly, I don't know how you're able to work side by side with your Ex and I can only imagine that it's holding up on your healing process. Of course I have, I just haven't found anything suitable yet. most jobs in my area are unsuitable for me financially unfotunately. And your right working with her is holding up my "healing process" as you put it.
Author Andy119 Posted December 4, 2012 Author Posted December 4, 2012 (edited) also being defensive about how innocent your actions are doesn't support it being unintentional. i know you're not an idiot, and i know you're very well aware of the drama you're trying to create IF you actually dated another girl you work with, WHILE also working with your ex. It'll only cause drama if she decides to stick her nose into my business. which hopefully she won't Also not being defensive wouldn't support them being unintentional either Edited December 4, 2012 by Andy119
bitterruin Posted December 5, 2012 Posted December 5, 2012 She's moved on but doesn't want you to move on. Just ignore her and keep doing what you're doing like someone above me said.
movingon12 Posted December 5, 2012 Posted December 5, 2012 I don't see anything wrong with a bit of harmless flirting - as long as you're not misleading the girls to think you want a relationship, but it doesn't sound like you're doing that. It's the first step to moving on and a good way to start to feeling better about things. But I do agree that flirting at work is not a good idea, no matter what the circumstances are, as flirting at work has this annoying tendency to turn into A Great Big Awkward Mess. So, be charming and lovely to the ladies at work, but dial back anything that could be considered flirting. I also agree with what the others have said, in the long run you are going to want to start seeing other people, so it would be worth thinking about where else you can start to meet people. If your life is full of nothing but your work and your ex, and your ex is at your work, it will be much harder to forget her and move on. Do you have male friends at work that could become people you socialise with?
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