Author th90 Posted December 5, 2012 Author Posted December 5, 2012 Keep with those thoughts! Unfortunately he has decided you aren't the best for him. I'd say its nothing against how great you were, just that something was missing. By no means should you have had to change for it. There will be someone out there for you who will love what you bring to Ye relationship. This is how I try and deal with caring for my ex, I will always hope she is doing well and is happy, but it's not my place to check up on her or to help her have a better life. True enough. I will start counting from today for not checking on him anymore in any way. I think I'm being insecure because I'm afraid I won't find that person made for me or I can't bring myself to love again.
cavalier99 Posted December 5, 2012 Posted December 5, 2012 Keep with those thoughts! I will always hope she is doing well and is happy. You do? I hope my EX spontaneously bursts into flames. ....Actually Im with you on this. My EX is good person however flawed (like all of us in some way) I forgive her and myself. I still do get angry at times but realize it is more about my ego being bruised than being mad at her. I really do wish her the best but I DEFINITLY dont want to be part of it or know anything about her happiness. 1
itsmyfault Posted December 5, 2012 Posted December 5, 2012 I feel the same as you do!! It's not that I can't approach people and talk to them. I just feel I won't find another girl who wants to be with me, That's because me and my Ex got together through unusual circumstances. I guess it's just a matter of time though 1
Chi townD Posted December 5, 2012 Posted December 5, 2012 True enough. I will start counting from today for not checking on him anymore in any way. I think I'm being insecure because I'm afraid I won't find that person made for me or I can't bring myself to love again. Don't go looking for him. The fact is, he's already out there trying to find you. The best thing you can do is put yourself out in the world. Join a club, find a hobby that you like with people that have a shared interest, go back to school; he may be in the study group that you form. Travel! Go see the world! Take yourself out of the norm and go see something amazing. He'll find you and it usually happens when you don't expect it. But, he's never going to find you if you're still hung up on this douche rocket. 1
itsmyfault Posted December 5, 2012 Posted December 5, 2012 Don't go looking for him. The fact is, he's already out there trying to find you. The best thing you can do is put yourself out in the world. Join a club, find a hobby that you like with people that have a shared interest, go back to school; he may be in the study group that you form. Travel! Go see the world! Take yourself out of the norm and go see something amazing. He'll find you and it usually happens when you don't expect it. But, he's never going to find you if you're still hung up on this douche rocket. Does this mean there is a girl looking for me too? or is it only guys that go looking?
Chi townD Posted December 5, 2012 Posted December 5, 2012 LOL! Guys are ALWAYS on the lookout. BUT, girls let you know they're interested if you can read the signs. 1
Author th90 Posted December 6, 2012 Author Posted December 6, 2012 Then comes another bad day Why oh why..?
movingon12 Posted December 6, 2012 Posted December 6, 2012 Someone may have suggested this already, but the book 'It's called a break up cos it's broken' is very good (it's by the same guy who did 'he's just not that into you' but don't let that you put you off). It really helped me when I was were you are now.
itsmyfault Posted December 6, 2012 Posted December 6, 2012 Chin up You're doing great. You've stated no contact. That in itself is a massive achievement! You are dealing with it better than most would. I've got a joke I heard that might cheer you up. "Over the last year I have purchased every product advertised on porn sites. My penis is now 325ft long" pretty lame but meh. Keep yourself busy and think of the days that are good.
Author th90 Posted December 6, 2012 Author Posted December 6, 2012 Someone may have suggested this already, but the book 'It's called a break up cos it's broken' is very good (it's by the same guy who did 'he's just not that into you' but don't let that you put you off). It really helped me when I was were you are now. Thanks for the recommendation
Author th90 Posted December 6, 2012 Author Posted December 6, 2012 Chin up You're doing great. You've stated no contact. That in itself is a massive achievement! You are dealing with it better than most would. I've got a joke I heard that might cheer you up. "Over the last year I have purchased every product advertised on porn sites. My penis is now 325ft long" pretty lame but meh. Keep yourself busy and think of the days that are good. I'm doing great handling this break up. I know that. I have also secretly wish to die so I don't have to suffer one more bit of this heartbreak but that is pure selfish and irrational. Arghh! Do you see my emotional trend by now? I do good for a day or two, then dwell into my heartbreak for the next 3-4 days. By the way, your joke is terrible haha thanks anyway, good try
itsmyfault Posted December 6, 2012 Posted December 6, 2012 I'm doing great handling this break up. I know that. I have also secretly wish to die so I don't have to suffer one more bit of this heartbreak but that is pure selfish and irrational. Arghh! Do you see my emotional trend by now? I do good for a day or two, then dwell into my heartbreak for the next 3-4 days. By the way, your joke is terrible haha thanks anyway, good try Haha, It was worth a shot! Urmmm on the bad days try and tell yourself that he is missing out, That he ain't coming crawling back because you won't let him. I know you'd love him back but if you think about it, You're relationship would probably never recover. You'd always feel like you were looking over your shoulder, just waiting to be dumped again. I know its horrible but the best thing is to keep on the path you are on. Keep telling yourself that you are someone everyone would want to be with. if you still feeling down, read some more jokes
geegirl Posted December 6, 2012 Posted December 6, 2012 Do you see my emotional trend by now? I do good for a day or two, then dwell into my heartbreak for the next 3-4 days. It's called the process of grieving. What you are going through is absolutely normal. It will come in waves. One moment you're okay and loving life and the next you're feeling despondent. It's not an indication that you aren't progressing. It's very much what entails when you are healing.
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