I am not my type's type

[TheBigQuestion]

If your trouble is finding and holding onto a romantic partner, NYC is most assuredly NOT for you.

[SmileFace]

You do not go to NYC to get a long term relationship. To have a decent dating life, yes... to settle down, no.

[ascendotum]

I think it's my location too.

 

I have only met couple of men here in YEARS that are truly interesting to me in the way that I would like. Even they weren't quite right.

 

Its tough living in the outback. A flower wilting in an arid land.

[Eternal Sunshine]

My current city has just as bad female to male ratio as NYC.

 

I don't really see a big deal in moving to NYC and getting a work contract for a year or 2. I am obviously stuck where I am, I am sick of my current job and I want to try something different. I can return at any time if it doesn't work out....

 

As for settling down, I am not sure I am ready to settle down yet, despite my age. I don't want to have kids so I am in no rush.

[Eternal Sunshine]

This also reminds of people who told me that I won't be able handle casual sex. Yet, I don't feel any worse off. I wasn't even into any of the guys except for one (but I have been into him even before the sex). When that didn't work out, I was upset for a few days but got over it. Now I feel, meh whatever.

 

I haven't been sad enough to cry in months. Actually last time I cried was when my cat was in hospital. That's how shattered I am by casual sex.

[TaurusTerp]

My current city has just as bad female to male ratio as NYC.

 

I don't really see a big deal in moving to NYC and getting a work contract for a year or 2. I am obviously stuck where I am, I am sick of my current job and I want to try something different. I can return at any time if it doesn't work out....

 

As for settling down, I am not sure I am ready to settle down yet, despite my age. I don't want to have kids so I am in no rush.

 

From the perspective of a guy that lived in NYC for 2 years: You do not want to move there. NYC has way more single women than men, and frankly, the women there are at the top of their game. Most women are ALWAYS dressed to the 9s, good looking, and there are a lot of accomplished women.

 

Frankly, I felt bad for a lot of women there - it was definitely a better environment for a guy.

[Eternal Sunshine]

Thanks for your opinions, I appreciate them.

 

I am still gonna move to NYC though

[TaurusTerp]

Thanks for your opinions, I appreciate them.

 

I am still gonna move to NYC though

 

More power to ya! It's definitely one of the most interesting cities on earth - even if dating isn't better, there are a lot of other ways the city makes up for it.

[Lonely Ronin]

I don't want to have kids so I am in no rush.

 

Have you mentioned this to any of the guys you have dated?

[LittlePrince]

Thanks for your opinions, I appreciate them.

 

I am still gonna move to NYC though

I'll meet you there.

[Mme. Chaucer]

My current city has just as bad female to male ratio as NYC.

 

I don't really see a big deal in moving to NYC and getting a work contract for a year or 2. I am obviously stuck where I am, I am sick of my current job and I want to try something different. I can return at any time if it doesn't work out....

 

As for settling down, I am not sure I am ready to settle down yet, despite my age. I don't want to have kids so I am in no rush.

 

That sounds like a great adventure. Would you seriously do it? Would you sublet your house?

 

I am a real proponent of going to a completely new place and living life for a while if a person has the desire to do so and their life is not ensconced yet. Of course it's not the way for everybody.

 

Would you be okay with leaving your family for a while?

[LittlePrince]

But shouldn't you be building a career instead of "backpacking through Europe"

[LittlePrince]

Maybe she already has had enough of her job, that she needs a break?

 

Besides you only live once and ES it seems you are doing a terrible job. So take a break from it.

She isn't even old enough for a break. Wait until your midlife crisis Stella before you get your groove back.

[LittlePrince]

I always hear NYC is great for a guy. But it is great for a guy with a good job. The same would be true anywhere else in the world. So don't try to say that NYC is good for a guy cause it isn't.

Minorities without jobs on welfare seem to be doing pretty well for themselves.

[LittlePrince]

Its not about being old its about being young and doing stuff before you are too old.

"Backpacking through Europe" is for early 20-somethings. She's in her 30's. That ship has sailed.

[Woggle]

From somebody who used to live there and just spent about a month staying with an uncle modern day New York is fun and interesting but also insanely expensive and unforgiving towards anybody who doesn't have skin as thick as Fort Knox walls. It's not the city you see in the movies anymore.

[LittlePrince]

From somebody who used to live there and just spent about a month staying with an uncle modern day New York is fun and interesting but also insanely expensive and unforgiving towards anybody who doesn't have skin as thick as Fort Knox walls. It's not the city you see in the movies anymore.

You mean the one with the hookers in time square?

[Mme. Chaucer]

From somebody who used to live there and just spent about a month staying with an uncle modern day New York is fun and interesting but also insanely expensive and unforgiving towards anybody who doesn't have skin as thick as Fort Knox walls. It's not the city you see in the movies anymore.

 

But it would be a fine place for a "sabbatical" from ES's regular life, don't you think?

[LittlePrince]

Having backpacked through Europe. You can still do it at a later age. It wasn't a rare sight to see 30+ at hostels.

It isn't unusual to see 40-somethings still crashing on their mother's couch. I wouldn't recommend it.

[Woggle]

But it would be a fine place for a "sabbatical" from ES's regular life, don't you think?

 

If she can afford it and doesn't think it will just magically solve everything. There are apartments the size of closets that literally cost over a million a month and hotels and motels are just as bad.

[Woggle]

You mean the one with the hookers in time square?

 

Those days are long gone though part of me wishes the NY of Taxi Driver would return.

[LittlePrince]

I find NYC very boring, dirty, dreary, and the damn hobos won't leave you alone.

[Woggle]

When I was living there it was some of the best times of my life after I left home but that era is over.

[FitChick]

She should join an online dating website and contact men in NYC so at the very least she will have some sort of social network set up when she arrives. They could introduce her to new people and she could take it from there.

 

Because of the massive paperwork and expense involved in moving to the US, I'd suggest taking a 10-day or two week holiday to see what the place is like. Just doing that would change her perspective on life.

[Woggle]

I would stay there for a week on vacation and see if you like it.