kaylee38 Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 Somebody please tell me if this is a problem or if I am just overreacting So the story: I am currently living with my boyfriend AND his mom. I have no family here, and I cannot afford to live on my own. I've never had a very strong relationship with his mom...she is very standoffish, so it was kind of awkward moving in at first, and still is months later. I've asked my boyfriend casually about the possibility of us getting our own place together and he wants to wait a year supposedly. He does not want me to move out with friends because he says it will ruin us. Now about his mom. The reason he doesn't want to leave is because she is recently divorced and is living on her own. She doesn't need any help with expenses; he says that she is "lonely" (even though she goes out with friends nearly every night). His relationship with her is starting to creep me out a bit. She ALWAYS wants him around and I almost feel like I am competing with her for his attention. She also has these "anxiety attacks" where she needs him to be with her...and sleep in her bed. There has been three times this has happened, and every time it's been on a day that she hasn't gotten as much attention. I Have come home to him being asleep on her lap watching tv, and he is constantly calling her beautiful... And doesn't for me!!! He is 21 years old and it is making me start to resent her. Am I overreacting or is this NOT normal?! Please help!
Balzac Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 Inappropriate behavior that has been long established. Sadly for him, I doubt he recognizes it as such.
darkmoon Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 (edited) she probably feels unattractive and whined to your boyf who has to compliment her (beautiful) and cosset her (in her bed, lap) but it's wierd alright i think she's screwed up over being divorced looking for love anywhere, see her as mentally ill, but be tactful and say nothing, you won't win, pity her as the abandoned middle-aged woman who never wanted divorce nobody would admit to being left/dumped/divorced, but the effects are clear, you could hint that she might like a herbal sedative, but your boyf has to be the one to call a doctor she has the added upset of seeing you, a young girl, succeeding in love where she failed, i feel sorry for her in a way, she wasted her life and probably wishes she's chosen a better sort of husband she's grieving, and her youth has gone Edited December 3, 2012 by darkmoon
KraftDinner Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 SO inappropriate. Reminds me of an episode of Twilight Zone I watched once. Or the movie Psycho. Ucky. Sleeps in her bed? Oh no no no. Calls her beautiful and not you? That's messed.
Treasa Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 OH MY GOD RUN!!!! I am so freaking serious about this. Minus the bed part, but plus 10 years part, and you would have my ex. Trust me, you do not want a guy who lives with his mom because she's lonely. RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN. OMG, I swear to God you just made me freak out thinking it was my ex until you said he was 21. Seriously, get out. Get a job and move out with friends if you value any of the years of your life.
Treasa Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 Well, after SIX YEARS he ended up never marrying me (blessing in disguise), never moving out, and as far as I know, 2 1/2 years later, he still lives with his mom and has had a few different jobs since I knew him. He's a momma's boy with no life. I want a real man.
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