ascendotum Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 You guys need to learn to work your assets and develop your assets. You claimed to be wealthy. There are tons of women who are attracted to a successful man. Buy some designer clothes, a high end car, and work that image to your advantage. There will be women who admire you for that. IT Geek.. there used to be this show 'queer eye for the straight guy' where a group of gay guys who knew all about style would come in and do a lifestyle makeover on some shabby uncool guy, usually at the request of his girlfriend. What you need is a 'sauve eye for the geek guy' makeover by a team of ladies men & life coaches (proper womanizers not wannabe hucksters). You have plenty of $ to spare. You achieved your financial goals, now you need to switch your focus to the other aspects of what makes you happy. You have plenty of $ at your disposal to adopt the life you want. 1
USMCHokie Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 You need to get yourself noticed, and stand out in some way if you want women to be interested over the guys who have more visual assets. I know a woman, a long-time friend of mine since childhood, and when our friend group would go out, she was always the life of the party--very charming, bubbly and engaging. All of the other women were better looking than her, but she always managed to grab a guy's interest and he'd ask for her phone number because her personality was so engaging. So she held her own with the better looking girls in the friend group because she compensated with her personality, which was very engaging. You guys need to work with what you can. You may not be able to change your appearance enough to outshine some of these guys, but you can work on your personality, your sense of humor, and your social skills, and that will get noticed by women. Well of course. But you see, my friends are also incredibly engaging as well as good looking. They are funny, charming, and know how to have fun. Unfortunately, I tend to keep pretty high quality friends...
Bristolius Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Maybe some of you guys should try being more assertive. That will lead to some of the women who aren't attracted to you at all thinking your a creep or what the heck ever but who cares? If they weren't attracted to you and are nasty enough to then call you a nasty name because of it what have you lost? In such a social situation with such a friend try the following. Work with him to manipulate the women, sounds horrible but this could work. He will attract them with his looks, then act with low confidence, low intelligence, and un generally attractive and submissive to you. This will lead those women to view you as the more desirable of the two. Remember sexual selection worked and works not only on appearance and physical traits but on mental qualities and behaviors. If this wasn't true we would still be like Australopithecus Africanus or something. Was it lack of intelligence that caused their extiction? Seriously, they were a solid 2/10 on a good day.
aed Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Well of course. But you see, my friends are also incredibly engaging as well as good looking. They are funny, charming, and know how to have fun. Unfortunately, I tend to keep pretty high quality friends... This is very difficult, If all your friends are charming, funny and women love being around them. They won't notice you and when they do: you probably become the 'funny guy' of the group and not the one they are feeling attracted to, right? You could split from your group at one point in the evening and then see if other women are interested. But that can be hard and difficult to do.
IT Geek Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 You guys need to learn to work your assets and develop your assets. You claimed to be wealthy. There are tons of women who are attracted to a successful man. Buy some designer clothes, a high end car, and work that image to your advantage. There will be women who admire you for that. That's exactly what I *DON'T* want. Someone to be with me (note that I did not use the words LIKE or LOVE) because of my wealth or status. I'd just get on whatsyourprice.com if that were the case. Still thinking about doing that for our company Christmas party. 1
IT Geek Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 You really need to gain confidence. Or perhaps get on anti depressants. You really feel less physically appealing than a man with als who walked, poorly, with a cane?. Unless your the elephant man, your more physically fit than he was. . I know it feels bad but it does get better. When women tell you to your face that you're unattractive or that they like you but want a size 36 you, it doesn't do much for your self confidence.
IT Geek Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 IT Geek.. there used to be this show 'queer eye for the straight guy' where a group of gay guys who knew all about style would come in and do a lifestyle makeover on some shabby uncool guy, usually at the request of his girlfriend. What you need is a 'sauve eye for the geek guy' makeover by a team of ladies men & life coaches (proper womanizers not wannabe hucksters). You have plenty of $ to spare. You achieved your financial goals, now you need to switch your focus to the other aspects of what makes you happy. You have plenty of $ at your disposal to adopt the life you want. I loved that show! LOL
KathyM Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 That's exactly what I *DON'T* want. Someone to be with me (note that I did not use the words LIKE or LOVE) because of my wealth or status. I'd just get on whatsyourprice.com if that were the case. Still thinking about doing that for our company Christmas party. Dear boy, if you are reluctant to use the one thing that sets you above 95% of the other men, and which would greatly impress many women, and which shows you to be a man of great achievement, then I don't know what else to tell you. Lose the weight. Develop your social skills. And don't be afraid to flash the cash. If you've got it, then flaunt it. That is the ONE thing you have going for you right now, so don't be afraid to show your strengths. Your weaknesses are not going to help you in the dating game. 1
Author AD1980 Posted December 4, 2012 Author Posted December 4, 2012 So some goldigger can use him for his cash? sounds great 2
ScreamingTrees Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Sounds legit, good ol' geeky here'll just wave a fistful of magic greenbacks in the air at the local bar. That'll have 'em running for all of the right reasons.
Mrlonelyone Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 When women tell you to your face that you're unattractive or that they like you but want a size 36 you, it doesn't do much for your self confidence. A healthy percentage of the people I've had sexual relations with prefaced the encounter with a declaration of how they never do this sort of thing, how not gay/lesbian they are, etc. Salesman's odds my friend. For each sale you make you will face ten objections (not rejections). In some PUA communities they call these "***t"test. Men and women do these things to eachother. People have to know two things...that your willing to get in there and hustle for what you need and that you care specifically about them. You've got the hustle to become an IT geek and make IT geek money when so many "hot" guys are begging for change on the street. My friend you are the first guy to invent a spear when everyone else had rocks. You are the first guy to invent running when others could barely walk. You are the first to invent a fork when others used their fingers. Like this. If women didn't have sex with guys like you, ever, as you claim we'd still be like stupider than homo erectus. Just a bunch of broad shouldered, pea brained shaved gorilla's running around naked (and no one would be gay or lesbian either.) The fact that we evolved to sit here in front of something as complex as a computer and have this discussion proves the inherent value of what you have to offer an intelligent woman. Guys like you and even two-spirited people like me are part of the reason we are what we are now. IMHO your problem could boil down to chasing after women who aren't bright enough to recognize your abilities for what they are. The other side of the coin of sexual selection for intelligence in men is that the woman has to be sharp enough to know real wisdom and knowledge when they see them. Stop going to the clubs expecting to meet a modern day Marie Curie they aren't there.
SteveC80 Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 The irony of Kathy M is she is as against prostitution as anyone ive ever seen yet is all for a women using a rich man for his money and a man using his money for sex
ScreamingTrees Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Salesman's odds my friend. For each sale you make you will face ten objections (not rejections). In some PUA communities they call these "***t"test. Men and women do these things to eachother. People have to know two things...that your willing to get in there and hustle for what you need and that you care specifically about them. . But.. How can you genuinely care specifically about someone who you hypothetically barely know? It's just manipulation, to me. I guess I'd have to force myself to be interested in order to catch someone's interest so that I can actually become interested in them? Eh And if someone rejects me, I might make a smart ass comment, but I'm not going to stand there with a presentation and try to forcefully change their mind, I don't need no mace to the face.. "But, if you accept ONE date with me within the next 12 minutes, you'll get this BONUS Forever-virgin package, complete with tweezers, tissues, Lubriderm and a recepticle for your tears on those lonely nights!" ".......Huh? Lost yours at the age of 12, you say? Have a vagina, you say? Wouldn't even know THAT for sure, myself. Ha ha! Gee, I'm terribly sorry, but that's all I've got in this box, really.. Oh, darn. Thanks for your time!"
KathyM Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 So some goldigger can use him for his cash? sounds great I'm not suggesting he give her money, or lavish her with gifts. I'm suggesting he upgrade his lifestyle that is indicative of a man of his achievement. Women respect a successful man. How is this any different than a woman being attracted to a guy's appearance? It's not. People put forth their best qualities and achievements to attract the opposite sex. I don't see this as any different than a woman putting on makeup and an attractive dress to attract a man. Sheesh. 1
KathyM Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 The irony of Kathy M is she is as against prostitution as anyone ive ever seen yet is all for a women using a rich man for his money and a man using his money for sex Tsk, tsk. I'm not suggesting a woman use him for his money. I'm suggesting he use his money on himself to present himself in a more upscale light. I don't see the problem with that. And I'm also not suggesting anything about sex. I'm suggesting he use his money on himself to upgrade his wardrobe and transportation. Jeez. 1
Mrlonelyone Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 But.. How can you genuinely care specifically about someone who you hypothetically barely know? It's just manipulation, to me. I guess I'd have to force myself to be interested in order to catch someone's interest so that I can actually become interested in them? Eh And if someone rejects me, I might make a smart ass comment, but I'm not going to stand there with a presentation and try to forcefully change their mind, I don't need no mace to the face.. "But, if you accept ONE date with me within the next 12 minutes, you'll get this BONUS Forever-virgin package, complete with tweezers, tissues, Lubriderm and a recepticle for your tears on those lonely nights!" ".......Huh? Lost yours at the age of 12, you say? Have a vagina, you say? Wouldn't even know THAT for sure, myself. Ha ha! Gee, I'm terribly sorry, but that's all I've got in this box, really.. Oh, darn. Thanks for your time!" Your thinking of it all wrong. It's like, some people think dating is this thing that happens automatically. You like them, and if they like you a date just happens. NO. When you ask someone on a date of any kind you are asking them to step out of their comfort zone. You are asking them to expend valued time, money, and energy to see you. You are in fact selling yourself to them. It's kinda like how you go to a car dealership thinking your just going to look. The salesman then has to get you to smell the new car smell. But you say your just going to smell not drive. The salesman then has you sit in the comfy heated driver seat. But you say your just going to enjoy the seat and the smell, you don't want a test drive. Then he turns on the engine so you can hear the engine. ..... and so on. Before you know it your driving off the lot in a new car. Seduction is like that. You place your hand higher and higher up on the thigh, over mild objections until you reach the crux of the matter.
IT Geek Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 I'm not suggesting he give her money, or lavish her with gifts. I'm suggesting he upgrade his lifestyle that is indicative of a man of his achievement. LOL...not sure how much I can upgrade. I live in a gated country club community and drive a Saab 9-3 ragtop.
Mrlonelyone Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 LOL...not sure how much I can upgrade. I live in a gated country club community and drive a Saab 9-3 ragtop. What are you wearing once you get out of that car? Clothes project that success everywhere you go, all the time. If your not so physically fit, a nice comfortable suit can make a man look sexy and feel confident. I know those feelings from both sides. It worked for Stephen Hawking!
IT Geek Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Where do you live, though? City, state? I just googled Saab car, you're projecting that you are boring. Get an Audi or BMW. You have the money to not go broke, so spend it cause you only have one life to live. Metro Atlanta, Georgia A Saab 9-3 is anything but boring.
ScreamingTrees Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Your thinking of it all wrong. It's like, some people think dating is this thing that happens automatically. You like them, and if they like you a date just happens. NO. When you ask someone on a date of any kind you are asking them to step out of their comfort zone. You are asking them to expend valued time, money, and energy to see you. You are in fact selling yourself to them. It's kinda like how you go to a car dealership thinking your just going to look. The salesman then has to get you to smell the new car smell. But you say your just going to smell not drive. The salesman then has you sit in the comfy heated driver seat. But you say your just going to enjoy the seat and the smell, you don't want a test drive. Then he turns on the engine so you can hear the engine. ..... and so on. Before you know it your driving off the lot in a new car. Seduction is like that. You place your hand higher and higher up on the thigh, over mild objections until you reach the crux of the matter. I guess so. But I figure asking someone out (wouldn't know them too well, considering my social circle's dwindled down naturally to several close friends living nearby, since all of my friends have gone to different colleges and whatnot) would just end up with them declining in some way, and it being awkward for both of us when I have to deal with them on a regular basis. I don't think I'm very good at "seducing".. I feel as if things have gone the greatest when I don't have to literally "sell" myself, but rather show who I am naturally through my words and actions. I didn't have to convince the girl of anything, she came to her own conclusions as we got to know each other. Probably isn't something to worry about, but I hope that if I were to ever even have the balls.. That asking out a random girl doesn't give her the idea that I particularly care about her, if I barely even know her.. That might sound *******-ish, but I don't mean in that way, I just wouldn't want her to make it awkward for the both of us with her assumptions if she declines, which would be the likely outcome anyway for whatever reason that may be..
PJKino Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 (edited) Women are hypergamous theyll all auotmatically pick the best lookign one in the group and fight over him youll have to get much uglier friends to have a chance Edited December 4, 2012 by PJKino
SmileFace Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 Women will judge you by your friends. It's better to hangout with better looking friends than fat slobs. Your insecurity is the problem. It's like you feel bad by looking at rich people. then why don't you move to ghetto area so you can feel rich? Exactly. No one wants to be the hot one in a group of uglies. Insecurity sure seems to be a bitch on this board.
Mrlonelyone Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 I guess so. But I figure asking someone out (wouldn't know them too well, considering my social circle's dwindled down naturally to several close friends living nearby, since all of my friends have gone to different colleges and whatnot) would just end up with them declining in some way, and it being awkward for both of us when I have to deal with them on a regular basis. You have to take the chance or nothing will ever ever happen. Just keep your eye peeled for signs of interest. Someone admiring the finish of the car as it were. If someone you know reject you, if they are even worth caring about, they won't be nasty about it. Furthermore, how you take the rejection can dictate your future chance with others in your social circle. I don't think I'm very good at "seducing".. I feel as if things have gone the greatest when I don't have to literally "sell" myself, but rather show who I am naturally through my words and actions. I didn't have to convince the girl of anything, she came to her own conclusions as we got to know each other. When you look for a job do you just show who you really are or do you write a well crafted resume which makes you look good without lying or obfuscating? That's all seduction is but applied to mating. Seduction is flirting. seduction is talking and showing who you are in a playful teasing manner. Revealing who you really are in a slow and teasing manner. Allowing them to uncover a bit more "flesh". If they just don't like you then being seductive can't work. The thing is you have to try and not assume that they don't like you. I know how protective it can feel to just pre-reject everyone who might reject you. Really reflect on how it makes you feel. Do you really feel better by deciding that no one can be attracted to you? Probably isn't something to worry about, but I hope that if I were to ever even have the balls.. That asking out a random girl doesn't give her the idea that I particularly care about her, if I barely even know her.. That might sound *******-ish, but I don't mean in that way, I just wouldn't want her to make it awkward for the both of us with her assumptions if she declines, which would be the likely outcome anyway for whatever reason that may be.. Some women are very melodramatic (some men too yes of course). They are the kinds who say any man who ask them out who isn't hot enough is a creep or stalker or whatever. Just ignore women like that after they reject you.
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