annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 so i went on a first date with a guy i like. im just mulling over a few things. he asked me some really weird (well imo) questions. he asked what my relationship with my parents was. and when was the last time i had a heart to heart sit down with my father. he also quizzed me in depth about my finances (im in college) and i ended up telling him every little detail because he put me on the spot. this is the guy that is now ignoring me/ brushing me off, i assume i answered a question wrong. that seems a little intense to me. do any of you people ask these kinds of questions on a date?
movingon12 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 That sounds more like an interview than a date... 4
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 That sounds more like an interview than a date... haha, it was really strange. i felt quite pressured to answer. generally not one for talking about that kinda stuff.
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 LOL. Man, I'd feel lucky if I where you. Nothing like an interview with the boss...er...I mean nut...er...um...Guy? Anabella dear ana-bell'a just try again you might get the job: I'm j/k! Anyway that was stupid of him. Oh well, you'll find a much normal dude soon.
movingon12 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 If it happens again, just make up crazy answers 2
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 LOL. Man, I'd feel lucky if I where you. Nothing like an interview with the boss...er...I mean nut...er...um...Guy? Anabella dear ana-bell'a just try again you might get the job: I'm j/k! Anyway that was stupid of him. Oh well, you'll find a much normal dude soon. i dont really understand the logic behind asking that kinda stuff tbh... If it happens again, just make up crazy answers haha, god. i wonder which answer was wrong :s
Kristine Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 He's an odd guy, dates are meant to get to know a person but not interrogate a person. He just doesn't know how to ask without being an interrogator.
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 He's an odd guy, dates are meant to get to know a person but not interrogate a person. He just doesn't know how to ask without being an interrogator. well thats what i thought. there was even a moment when he asked exactly what loan money i got and what dates i got it on. and i asked are you serious and he said yes. so i was like..er ok...and explained.. i paid for myself btw!
Kristine Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 Total jerk, be glad he's out of your life. I dated a guy similar to that for a short while. Found out he had more to hide than I did. 1
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 He maybe trying to gauge how you would be in a relationship..based on how well connected you are to your dad(maybe he dad daddy issue girls.) He seemed to focus around that one the most.
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 Total jerk, be glad he's out of your life. I dated a guy similar to that for a short while. Found out he had more to hide than I did. lol really?? He maybe trying to gauge how you would be in a relationship..based on how well connected you are to your dad(maybe he dad daddy issue girls.) He seemed to focus around that one the most. well yeah...i dont get on with my father. but i felt relatively at ease to say so after this guy spent 20 minutes slagging his off.
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 Lol, in anycase, it really shouldn't matter now. He shouldn't have questioned you like that. I'd just take the small blow, and find someone who will not question you in such a formate, that makes it seems suspicious.
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 Lol, in anycase, it really shouldn't matter now. He shouldn't have questioned you like that. I'd just take the small blow, and find someone who will not question you in such a formate, that makes it seems suspicious. i think im really irked because id sworn off dating for the foreseeable future after all the hassle, its just not worth it. ive been fine for about 8 months, not one care or wish for a relationship. i rejected this guy but he kept hassling me to go on a date, so i caved. and now HE is ignoring ME. im just pissed.
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 i think im really irked because id sworn off dating for the foreseeable future after all the hassle, its just not worth it. ive been fine for about 8 months, not one care or wish for a relationship. i rejected this guy but he kept hassling me to go on a date, so i caved. and now HE is ignoring ME. im just pissed. I understand. I wouldn't want to be questioned like that, and then have some douchebag ignore me. vent all you like sweetie, tell him off on here all you like. I can even help: He's a dumbass prick. He shouldn't annoy you like that, then question you like that, then ignore you like that. He's a loser. besides why do that to a chick named: Anabelle, that is a nice name btw! 3
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 I understand. I wouldn't want to be questioned like that, and then have some douchebag ignore me. vent all you like sweetie, tell him off on here all you like. I can even help: He's a dumbass prick. He shouldn't annoy you like that, then question you like that, then ignore you like that. He's a loser. besides why do that to a chick named: Anabelle, that is a nice name btw! lol thank you! i think i might have to go for a run, im so mad! i will never understand men!
Cutiepie1976 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 So I'm curious... He's asking for details on school loans, finances, your parents, etc. Did he ask for your parents' names, your birthday, your middle name, where you bank, etc? Is it possible you gave him enough information to scam you out of your money and/or for identity theft? Just a thought... If it happens again, just make up crazy answers This is what I do. First I just ignore the question and redirect the conversation elsewhere, if the question or the line of questioning feels inappropriate. If he persists, then I jokingly give completely outlandish responses. Most take a hint and switch gears from one or both of these tactics. Just because someone asks a question, doesn't mean you are compelled to answer it. Know your own boundaries. As for this nut job? Good riddance I say! 1
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 So I'm curious... He's asking for details on school loans, finances, your parents, etc. Did he ask for your parents' names, your birthday, your middle name, where you bank, etc? Is it possible you gave him enough information to scam you out of your money and/or for identity theft? Just a thought... he did ask when my birthday was but thats it. not quite enough for identity fraud i dont think but god it makes it obvious how easy it could be :s This is what I do. First I just ignore the question and redirect the conversation elsewhere, if the question or the line of questioning feels inappropriate. If he persists, then I jokingly give completely outlandish responses. Most take a hint and switch gears from one or both of these tactics. Just because someone asks a question, doesn't mean you are compelled to answer it. Know your own boundaries. i was so taken aback & tried not to make it more awkward. it did annoy me a bit though. i like this approach though, fingers crossed i wont come across this kinda thing again but if i do ill definitely use this approach! cant believe the cheek of some people tbh, i wouldnt dream of asking people this kinda stuff. even if i knew them really well. As for this nut job? Good riddance I say! yeah i guess. when i get over the annoyance! x
dasein Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 Not a good bet. He has done you a favor by not contacting. Those kinds of questions on early dates are rude and kill the fun. People who insist on turning early dates into HR interviews are not only unimaginative and dull, but have a narrow agenda in mind that is not subject to negotiation. Avoid. 1
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 Not a good bet. He has done you a favor by not contacting. Those kinds of questions on early dates are rude and kill the fun. People who insist on turning early dates into HR interviews are not only unimaginative and dull, but have a narrow agenda in mind that is not subject to negotiation. Avoid. thanks for the input. you're right, it was rude. sigh. never mind eh.
Cutiepie1976 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 he did ask when my birthday was but thats it. not quite enough for identity fraud i dont think but god it makes it obvious how easy it could b Well, he knows how old you are, right? So he now has your birthdate. Ditto for other relevant pieces of information. Throw in some random stuff (e.g. relationship with your parents) and your antennae won't be up when he asks for information that he is truly after. It's very easy to connect the dots, especially if you are flustered and caught off-guard about the whole encounter. Be more circumspect about the information you share with complete strangers. 2
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 lol thank you! i think i might have to go for a run, im so mad! i will never understand men! If it helps ill never understand women...all I know is to run and hide when one is mad:p 1
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 god its ridiculous but i feel really down about this. despite the weird questions we got on incredibly well & everything. was hopeful for a second. just feel like this always happens, and its all thats ever gonna happen. sigh! thanks for the answers guys.
carlosquintas Posted December 2, 2012 Posted December 2, 2012 I think he was playing games with you, I know as a man how important is the father daughter relationship so I can gain points on her, to ask you about money, probably his idea was to show you that he was a boy interested in your future and willing to have a serious relationship with you. that is all a scam to take you to bed, probably not gonna like to hear, but it is possible that he has found a woman more easily and not willing to invest more time in you. that is just my opinion
Author annabelle26 Posted December 2, 2012 Author Posted December 2, 2012 I think he was playing games with you, I know as a man how important is the father daughter relationship so I can gain points on her, to ask you about money, probably his idea was to show you that he was a boy interested in your future and willing to have a serious relationship with you. that is all a scam to take you to bed, probably not gonna like to hear, but it is possible that he has found a woman more easily and not willing to invest more time in you. that is just my opinion to be honest i dont credit the guy with enough intelligence to try and work the father/ daughter angle. but i appreciate the viewpoint.
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