The Worst Part...by far

[Jono85]

for me, it's the realization that it'll NEVER be the same. my ex and I broke up a couple times, but we were never broken up for long, and we kept talking daily essentially, so it didn't seem real. but this time it's definitely real, and it's her doing the breaking up. the pain has been tremendous. not only is it hard to deal with the void she's left, but she's been pretty cold throughout the process. she ignored my last text 3 weeks ago just asking how her new job/boss was. ignored. someone u were so intimate with and supposedly loved/cared about u. that's when i knew it was over for good. it was pretty hurtful b/c to me it's like she's saying "i don't care if we're ever on good terms again, so i'll just ignore you". i can't possibly know why she chose to ignore me, there could be a few possible reasons, but it flat out sucks.

 

now back to the point. it'll never be the same between us. she's ruined it. i don't even mean our romantic relationship, i just mean she's ruined ANY kind of relationship with her in the future. how the hell can i ever act like nothing happened between us, like she never destroyed me and seemingly didn't care about it. why would i ever want to even acknowledge her existence again after she's basically kicked me out of her life??

 

and yet a lot of ppl would agree with me. there IS no point. she has power over me forever. even if i never talk to her again she'll always remember me as the poor guy she crushed and feel sorry for me if anything.

 

and lets suppose she does come running back, begging, pleading, etc etc (never happening, but just hypothetically..). why on Earth would i take someone back who was content to throw me right out of their life and act like i didn't exist anymore for the following months (years?). the only reason she'd come back is if her dating life didn't work out. so basically she was all cool to abandon me forever, until maybe she gets crushed or heart broken down the road, or the options weren't that great. so i'm supposed to just accept her back as if i was always "good enough" for her?? i don't think so.

 

like i said, it'll never be the same. ah well.

[source24]

Oh god. I know this feeling man. One moment they are your best friend in the world, and just a few months later, it seems like they don't even care about you. It really sucks to lose someone who matters so much to you. I mean I know for me, she was literally the only person I really texted multiple times on a daily basis. Losing someone that was such a huge part of your life is hard.

 

I guess you just got to move on, and realize that even though you can't have what you used to have, you still have someone that cares about you. Even in relationships that end on terrible terms, there is always an element of caring there, even if it isn't made evident. It will never be the same, and that is a shame, but if you are mature and you are ready, you can still keep them as someone who truly cares about you and knows you better than most people in the world.

 

This obviously doesn't happen immediately, but eventually most ex couples get to a point where they have made themselves better and moved on from the hurt of the relationship. Sometimes this takes only a few months, other times it takes years, but when it does happen, you can share a very special relationship with them. One of respect, caring, friendship and a shared sense of loss. What you had was great, and you made a huge impact on each others lives, but now you have to move forward.

[LostOne1]

I know EXACTLY how you feel.. even though part of me wants my ex back.. I started to wonder.. HOW is it going to work? After everything.. how is it going to work?

 

And that makes me wonder if that's what my ex was going through too after out huge fight. Maybe for her it felt like how is coming back after this going to work.

 

The truth is.. there is no answer. Because it all depends on how 2 people react in person. I think what if we met up and went bowling right now. Would be still laugh? smile? crack jokes? Motivate each other to get a strike?

 

hard to say.. I think it's possible still. But 2 people would have to be VERY strong enough to totally let go of the past and the bad feelings and start fresh. And it IS possible, I have seen people do it.. but the chances are VERY low.

 

Why? because its rare to find 2 people, who BOTH can let it go and start a new with each other. And if only 1 out of the 2 can do it.. it doesn't work. BOTH need to let it slide and then see.

 

But really these days I find people are to easily breaking apart and having to move on instead of working for it.

 

I laugh because everyone thinks there is someone better or GIGS or other crap. The fact is there is no PERFECT person. No one will find someone that is exactly how they want a partner. But you sure can get some qualities you really like.

 

But at the end of the day it's all about 2 people WORKING on a relationship rather than saying im lazy it isnt working and im gonna find someone else.

 

But man hang in there... it's tough and things will be good somedays and ****ty others. But that's how BU's are and thats how we gotta get through them.

 

I always wonder if my EX is even missing me. Deep down inside her heart if shes still hurt and still has be in there not able to fully let me out. But then I say.. why does it matter. I have a new goal and responsiblity now and that is to get myself somewhere in life. I won't date now till I am a bit more settled with at least a job.