lostmamba Posted December 1, 2012 Posted December 1, 2012 After these past couple months of trying to experiment with dating, I still feel clueless on when exactly I should take it to the next level, as in asking women for dates. I have no problems talking to women in classes, finding a way in getting their numbers, and flirting with them, making them laugh and feel comfortable, but when exactly should I feel confident enough to make an official move to ask her out on a date? I think part of the problem came from me not knowing if women are interested in me as I am in them. For example, I officially started hitting on this girl in 2 of my classes about two weeks ago. Got her number and everything and I can tell she is getting more and more comfortable with me, but how do I know when to make the next move? I have read contradicting stories and posts where guys believed they needed to make a move fast before getting FZ'd, but also read posts where some guys took it slow and slowly let it developed. What do I do here? Should I text her more often? (I gradually texted her more and more the second week compared to the first week, just so far not on the weekends.....) I felt like my uncertainty has held me back in getting dates with 3-4 women in the past couple months and I really would like your opinions on what to do. Am I thinking and analyzing things way too much? Thanks!
pbjbear Posted December 1, 2012 Posted December 1, 2012 After these past couple months of trying to experiment with dating, I still feel clueless on when exactly I should take it to the next level, as in asking women for dates. I have no problems talking to women in classes, finding a way in getting their numbers, and flirting with them, making them laugh and feel comfortable, but when exactly should I feel confident enough to make an official move to ask her out on a date? I think part of the problem came from me not knowing if women are interested in me as I am in them. For example, I officially started hitting on this girl in 2 of my classes about two weeks ago. Got her number and everything and I can tell she is getting more and more comfortable with me, but how do I know when to make the next move? I have read contradicting stories and posts where guys believed they needed to make a move fast before getting FZ'd, but also read posts where some guys took it slow and slowly let it developed. What do I do here? Should I text her more often? (I gradually texted her more and more the second week compared to the first week, just so far not on the weekends.....) I felt like my uncertainty has held me back in getting dates with 3-4 women in the past couple months and I really would like your opinions on what to do. Am I thinking and analyzing things way too much? Thanks! Id just go for it and ask her out. You will find contradicting opinions because everyone is different. I tend to do better in relationships that gradually develop due to my personality. One of the very first guys I dated about 4 years ago came on too strong after 2 dates and scared me off because I do not want a clingy person. However, some girls like that. Also, I see you are trying to judge if a girl is interested in you and thats good, but just keep in mind you cannot read a girl's mind. Many girls are advised to not act too interested to make a guy like you more and everyone has a different personality also. Im not a big flirt so if I only flirt with a guy a little bit that doesnt mean I only like him a little bit.Try to see how she acts towards other people...that can give light to her personality. When guys that flirt with tons of girls hit on me and flirt with me I do not take them seriously. If shes talked to you this much, chances are she must like you some. If she says no to a date, you did yourself a favor and focus your energies on someone else.
dasein Posted December 1, 2012 Posted December 1, 2012 (edited) Call and ask out within a few days of getting the phone number. Ask for the phone number as soon as you think this might be a person you want to date. The more fast and mechanical you make the early process the better and more comfortable you will get in time. You want to seek to know women by dating them, not getting to know them for lengthy periods and then asking out. If a woman balks at a simple date invite as being too forward, she is likely low quality, very inexperienced or has unrealistic expectations. The kind of women you want will be flattered and responsive to a date invite, even if they turn you down. The others should be screened out. Edited December 1, 2012 by dasein
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