Genie1 Posted November 30, 2012 Posted November 30, 2012 Hi all. I'm brand new here and this is my first posting. Basically I met this man at work (I'm 26 and he is 35), and we got on great from the start. Cutting the start short, few days later we started messaging on social networking sites to each other, just general chat, getting to know each other, having a laugh, just really NICE. We saw each other at work after that messaging day and it was kinda awkward cos I think we were both a bit embarrassed because it was clear we liked each other and he put his head down and shuffled past me with a shy "hi how are you".... But yet the next night we were chatting away on Facebook. Few days later we exchanged numbers and continued to talk after work via text. Our conversations became a little flirty, but nice all the time. And the embarrassment disappeared when we saw each other at work ... Which was great. So yeah, we're texting and FINALLY he asks me out on a dinner/drinks date. We go out, have a nice time. Then I heard nothing from him for 3 days. I was going out of my mind, thinking "what have I done?!" Etc, as everything was great before that. We finally got chatting again like nothing had happened then our messages became frequent like the old times. We were messing each other a few nights back and we both admitted we were a little drunk and our conversation turned a bit more personal. With him admitting to me he likes me and wishes to do more to me than friends. I was relived at this cos it's what I want!! He asked if I'd like to go out with him for a few drinks on our next days off and I accepted, and he said "I'm looking forward to it"... Happy! ..... We saw each other at work the next day and prior to starting work he text me and apologised if his messages were insulting the night before, he was drunk and didnt wish to offend me. I said no he didn't offend me. Work was great, loads of flirting. Now, 4 days down the line and I've not heard a single peep from him in 4 days. I've text him twice (separate occasions) asking him How are you? And mentioned meeting up. And both times they have been ignored!!!!! I feel a total idiot. What if he doesn't reply by the next time we see each other at work. Why is he being like this? Why get really flirty with me, suggest a second date and then just disappear and ignore me! It's very rude. I'm too old to be playing games! My friends said "maybe he is shy after sending you those messages". If anyone can shed some light on this that would be great. I spend my life checking my phone Just to add - I really don't think he is in for just sex with me. As I've known him about 3 months and he probably would have tried it on by now - not spent his time getting to know me! Thank you, Marie - Yorkshire.
betterdeal Posted November 30, 2012 Posted November 30, 2012 He sounds shy to me too and maybe he's also inexperienced at courting; maybe at sex too. It's a shame, because when he let's his guard down and be's himself you two seem to have a lot of fun. But the good thing is you two like each other and you have fun together. Maybe try calling each other and translating that energy from written communication to spoken. You might get somewhere by saying you're a bit shy but would like to learn to be flirtatious in person, so maybe you could start out slow and gently, and he could help you get over your shyness. Bit of a white lie, maybe, but it may well put him at ease to know you can identify with him at that level too
Author Genie1 Posted November 30, 2012 Author Posted November 30, 2012 Hello thank you for replying No, he's def not shy or inexperienced at sex. The first time we met we got on like old friends and we were openly chatting about how long we'd been single/wether we'd met anyone recently. So that's not the issue....I just find it very frustrating that someone can be (almost), all over me one minute, and inviting me out, then just blatantly ignore me/my texts which makes me look like a desperate needy female (which I am soo not) ha It's made me feel pretty low
Toddbt12y1 Posted November 30, 2012 Posted November 30, 2012 He might be wanting you to miss him as a way to court you. Clearly it has worked you are thinking of him. Or it could be anything else. Ask him missy want hurt to talk. Prove how fit he is at a relationship
betterdeal Posted November 30, 2012 Posted November 30, 2012 As long as you don't see it as your fault, maybe think of it as odd but not necessarily mean behaviour, you'll be okay. Maybe take it all a bit more slowly, calmly. But not too laid back! Some tension is good, especially early on, and less can be more. You have plenty of time.
Author Genie1 Posted December 1, 2012 Author Posted December 1, 2012 Thanks all. He messages me yesterday and we exchanged maybe 3 or 4 texts throughout the day. So at least it won't be awkward when we see each other in the work place. I dunno what's going on though. It really was/still is (!) confusing and frustrating that someone can be that full on with words and all that, to acting like it never happened. Lucky for me, that sort of behaviour bores me solid so if he doesn't get his ideas up, I'll be off and he will regret it cos I'll find myself another guy to hang with.
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