figurinitout12 Posted November 29, 2012 Posted November 29, 2012 I married my 2nd wife 5 years ago. Unfortunately I have an obsession with very fit women and, though I realized my soon to be new wife did not meet the standard I had set, I felt we had such a strong connection fitness wouldn't be an issue. My wife and I had discussed having sex tonight. Sadly, its something we almost have to plan now. While watching tv she started touching me and getting "frisky". What's really strange is, not only did I not get fired up, (which I could attribute to an assumed low T) but I became physically sick at my stomach. Once before I almost cried while having sex with her. I've set up such a great idea of what the object of my affection would be that my wife, with her many shortcomings, falls way short! My question is, has anyone else, man or woman, experienced this? I've gained 15-20 lbs and absolutely hate my new look. Is this the reason I'm so unforgiving for my spouses 30+ lbs of weight gain over the last 3 years? I try so hard to set the mood, romance her, share my desires, and yet when the moment presents itself, I get nauseous. Any advice is welcome!
Trixis4kidz Posted November 30, 2012 Posted November 30, 2012 Well you married your wife on false pretenses so this was doomed from the start. If you weren't attracted to how she was and she didn't meet what you were looking for, this is YOUR problem, because you shouldn't have said vows. There is no fix here because YOU are the problem and your inflated idea of how she is supposed to be. Let alone the weight gain, you also specified her "many shortcomings". She is who she is, you can't change her and even if you did something like ask her to join the gym with you - that would ONLY be a temporary fix if at all. You would then find something else to obsess over that you don't like. So all that being said, if you are not willing to accept her as is, then why continue on? If she is any kind of woman, she should pick up on your lack of interest in sex with her and not be pleased. So her happiness is suffering as well as yours. No way to live.
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