emilywtf Posted November 29, 2012 Posted November 29, 2012 You are the most frustrating man I have even met. You have abused me, and cheated, you are an alcoholic and just generally a jerk, and yet I was so completely devoted to you. I felt we had an epic love, the kind of love they write stories about, that connection.... I guess I was the only one who felt that way. My heart would pitter patter whenever you kissed me, even after all those years, and you were out kissing others... Whatever. I need to get over this. You are dating and have been, you tell me I am horrible and that you were never happy in this relationship. You tell me I am like Hitler and a sociopath and narcissitic (love the psychobable buzz words). You told me you hated me and wished I would die. I deserve someone that feels for me the way I felt about you that you, apparently, never did about me. I DESERVE that. It is just convincing myself that I do. I miss you. I am moving out and you don't know, but I miss you already. I know I will be lonely for you, at least for a while. I cannot sleep if you are not there so there will be sleepless nights in my future. I am sure you will never consider me again- I'll be that "bitch" of an ex, the "sponge" as you like to call me, and you will be happy that I am gone. But I will keep you in my heart because you were my true love, my first real love, and that by itself deserves a fond memory (tinged with pain). **I want to vomit. This is by far the hardest thing I have ever done, to leave him. I have to convince myself that I should leave even though I know I need to leave**
The_Face Posted November 30, 2012 Posted November 30, 2012 Sounds like he was a lucky guy and he blew it. Good for you, getting out. You seem to realize it is going to be tough, even though it is the right thing to do. This is good. Remember that it will hurt for a while and don't let that pain cloud your judgement, because this man doesn't sound worthy of your love. And you also seem to realize that. Good for you. It took me the whole summer to get to the point you're at now. I stayed with my gf through soo much, I was too optimistic things would change. Luckily I did what you did, and I'm free. Well... sort of. Take it easy there wtfemily. Stay tuff
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