annabelle26 Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 so me and this guy had been on 2 dates, he pursued me quite intensely and we went out, both times went incredibly well. i text him after the second date saying thanks i had a nice time, he ignored me. anyway, the next night i thought i havent shown much interest in the guy so ill ask him out as itd be the 3rd arrangement. he ignored me again. i text him the next day saying "well i feel a bit silly, guess ill see you around." it definitely felt like i was getting brushed off. deleted his number. straight after that he replied back with a big apology and he had just been busy with work etc etc, what did i have in mind for this date. i told him (just a college event he had expressed interest in before) and he said "oh cool, ill let you know closer to the time as i have alot of work on at the minute. how have you been?" i replied saying yeah good thanks & thats good with me to get back to me whenever. deleted his number again to stop myself texting again. anyway, that was 4 days ago!!! wtf???? this date thing is in 2 days so i guess there's still tomorrow, but what are peoples opinions on this? i really do feel like im getting the run around. if you're not interested, tell me. im a big girl, and tbh im of the age now where im used to this kind of b.s. its not a big deal. why keep me hanging???
MyPoutine Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 You always have the option to simply walk away, it's a harsh and hard lesson to learn sometimes but once you start it gets easier. Ask a friend to join yo to the event if you were intending to go anyway.
Treasa Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 People aren't really good at hurting other people's feelings, and as much as I hate to generalize, SOME men don't seem to realize that they can break things without appearing to be the bad guy. I think if someone thinks you're a nice person, but they aren't interested in you, it's easier to just ignore them and hope the situation resolves itself. It'd be nice if we could all be more honest with each other, but even I had a hard time breaking up with my ex, because despite his emotional abuse, I didn't want to hurt him.
Author annabelle26 Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 People aren't really good at hurting other people's feelings, and as much as I hate to generalize, SOME men don't seem to realize that they can break things without appearing to be the bad guy. I think if someone thinks you're a nice person, but they aren't interested in you, it's easier to just ignore them and hope the situation resolves itself. It'd be nice if we could all be more honest with each other, but even I had a hard time breaking up with my ex, because despite his emotional abuse, I didn't want to hurt him. oh ive been the person to silently let somoene go, dont get me wrong. as bad as it is. but i dont understand why he suddenly apologised and sent a 3 text long ramble and whatever. what was the point? grrr
Treasa Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Because you suddenly said you were giving up. People don't like to lose what they think they, have either.
Author annabelle26 Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 Because you suddenly said you were giving up. People don't like to lose what they think they, have either. lol. oh im glad i deleted his number. im a bit cross.
Treasa Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 And God, I can't type for **** today. My comma was totally in the wrong place and I have no idea how I missed it.
Author annabelle26 Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 I don't blame you! I would be, too. its depressing. we got on so well. he really had to convince me to go out with him because i wasnt really interested. how annoying. ugh.
Treasa Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Well, I obviously can't read this guy's mind, but it could be that he was into you, but then work really did get busy, and he doesn't know how to compartmentalize. Or maybe he likes chasing you, and your texts turned him off. Either way, I honestly think you deserve better. You deserve someone who's crazy about you and who you have to slow down because he's contacting you so much.
Author annabelle26 Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 Well, I obviously can't read this guy's mind, but it could be that he was into you, but then work really did get busy, and he doesn't know how to compartmentalize. Or maybe he likes chasing you, and your texts turned him off. Either way, I honestly think you deserve better. You deserve someone who's crazy about you and who you have to slow down because he's contacting you so much. lol thanks. its so annoying though, ive been called out on "not acting interested" in the past by guys. then i go and act interested, and i think ive come across as desperate or needy. what the ffffff is the right move as a girl?? should i have just kept quiet?
Treasa Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 With the right kind of guy, you don't have to be quiet. It's just hard finding the right guy, sometimes. If a guy tells you you aren't acting interested enough, unless you're really not (and only you know the truth), then they're just telling you BS. At least you didn't get stuck with him for nine months like I did with my most recent ex.
Author annabelle26 Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 With the right kind of guy, you don't have to be quiet. It's just hard finding the right guy, sometimes. If a guy tells you you aren't acting interested enough, unless you're really not (and only you know the truth), then they're just telling you BS. At least you didn't get stuck with him for nine months like I did with my most recent ex. i hate dating :'( guess ill truly know come friday as he shouldve been in touch by then. what a horrible feeling. sigh.
Treasa Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 *hugs* Anything fun you can do? Go out with your girl friends? Make new friends with a hot guy?
Cutiepie1976 Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 oh ive been the person to silently let somoene go, dont get me wrong. as bad as it is. but i dont understand why he suddenly apologised and sent a 3 text long ramble and whatever. what was the point? grrr One of two things: He's truly busy and distracted (unlikely) He's leaving things open-ended on the off-chance of a hook-up or FB down the road. If he's definitive about not wanting to date you, that option generally disappears. There are others, who will make better dates.
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