Lambix Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 So, somehow I managed to pull off getting the number from a girl who works at a coffee shop I frequent. We have had probably around 10 minutes of conversation total. Needless to say I barely know her. I do know some essentials, namely that we have some common interests and she is definitely the type of girl I usually like. I texted her a bit the night after getting her number and asked if she wanted to hang out some time next weekend to which she responded yes to. I'm going to call her up tomorrow to finalize the day and place. So, what's the best setting to get to know someone? In most cases I would've gone the coffee route, but I highly doubt that something she would want to do considering she's around it all day. Would dinner be the safest choice here?
GirlontheLam Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 I don't like going to dinner unless I am 100% sure we have stuff to talk about. How about a mid afternoon snack Like cupcakes. Or ice cream. Wine tasting is good sometimes. Farmers market. I also like art gallery openings. 1
Author Lambix Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 I was thinking about an art museum or something of the sort. Problem is, I know she likes art and while I admire it, I'm no student of it. I would hate to have nothing intelligent to say. Another problem is, I know she works weekend afternoons which leaves her only free on evenings. Ice cream could be good and is definitely casual enough for us to both be relaxed. Would I seem cheap in suggesting just going for ice cream though and not dinner? All my guy friends are suggesting that dinner is the best idea.
GirlontheLam Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Dinner can be high pressure. It is nice to do something with built in distractions to encourage conversation. Things like bowling and ice skating can be fun. See if any museums have a late night on a weekend day. You can always extend into dinner if you like each other.
movingon12 Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Go for a drink at a nice bar. If it's going well, suggest going on somewhere for dinner. If it isn't, then, don't. 2
Napoolion Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Go have a walk in a park. You can buy coffee and just talk. It is really safest option. You can take her to watch art later if you make sure she likes art. Actually you can go anywhere you like, but avoid noisy places. Bar is bad option I think. Where do you live? I like taking first date near the beach for a walk. Simple, beautiful. good luck
grkBoy Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 I don't like going to dinner unless I am 100% sure we have stuff to talk about. How about a mid afternoon snack Like cupcakes. Or ice cream. Wine tasting is good sometimes. Farmers market. I also like art gallery openings. I was going to say dinner, but I changed my mind. Love these ideas better.
Cutiepie1976 Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Most guys tend to take me to dinner (and if things are going well, they'll suggest something else afterwards, like drinks, listening to a local band, etc). I like it because the point of a first date is to get to know a person. You need a setup that is conducive to talking. I really like the art museum idea! My vote is for that! (If it were me, I'd give you brownie points for remembering my interest and for picking something that revolved around my interests.) Tell her you aren't the biggest art connoisseur, but you know she likes art. You're interested in learning what she sees in some of the pieces at blah blah blah (name whatever exhibit is currently on display at the museum you'd pick). Does she like a certain type of art or certain period? Have fun!
Author Lambix Posted November 29, 2012 Author Posted November 29, 2012 Crap. Called her last night and it went straight to voicemail. Which I guess means she didn't have service or her phone was off. Left a message but didn't hear back from her. I'm quite the pessimist so I figured something like this might happen! I was hoping to go out with her tomorrow night, should I just wait it out to see if i hear from her or eventually follow up?
clia Posted November 30, 2012 Posted November 30, 2012 In the future, don't call on Wednesday night to ask for a Friday date. Odds are she already has plans for tomorrow night. Make the plan by Monday or Tuesday. For now, you wait and see if she returns your call. Don't be surprised if you don't hear from her until Sunday or Monday. (Many people go out Thurs, Fri, and Sat nights and she may have a full weekend.). She'll return your call if she wants to go out with you--assuming you asked her to call you back in your voice mail.
mortensorchid Posted November 30, 2012 Posted November 30, 2012 No response? Ah well, life goes on. I'd suggest coffee or a drink at a bar (a nice one not a honky tonk) for a real "get to know you" type situation. My last serious bf and I met up at a bar. We had known each other for a bit casually, then he asked to meet via Facebook chat.
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 30, 2012 Posted November 30, 2012 Go for a drink at a nice bar. If it's going well, suggest going on somewhere for dinner. If it isn't, then, don't. This. If it were me, it wouldn't even have to be a "nice" bar...just one you maybe think she would like. I know you don't know much about her yet, but if she's kinda quirky or hipstery, she might like an interesting microbrew place. If she's a bit edgy, maybe a cool dive bar. If you're unsure, then yeah, just somewhere with a nice atmosphere where you can talk. A good way to do it is suggest to meet up around happy hour time. Then you can have a drink, and if it goes well, it's still plenty early enough to hop over to a restaurant and have dinner. If you're not feeling it, or unsure, then you can just depart after the drink. This is assuming you're in some kind of "downtown" area and that it is feasible to walk from point A to point B. Edit: just saw that you didn't hear back from her. I'm sorry to hear that. Never know, though.
Author Lambix Posted November 30, 2012 Author Posted November 30, 2012 Hi all, thanks for all the advice. She did call back that day and seemed enthusiastic to meet up with me. We set the date up for tonight.... But, I think some supernatural force is working against me and my love life. Without going into any details let's just say the date's cancelled. I'm not even certain anymore that I'll hear from her again, I cannot believe my luck sometimes.
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