A rant to the ex

[PennGuy]

Three years. Three years and you throw me away like some piece of garbage. Well, guess what, sweetheart? You f**** up. I know I am not perfect and I have my flaws, but if watching too many sports and being too opinionated are my biggest issues, then good luck finding someone more suitable.

 

I waited on you hand and freaking foot. Will you do this...do that...get this? I always did. I always came home from work and kissed you. ALWAYS. It was one of the first things I did. I always said "I love you". I kept the house clean to the best of my ability. I cooked meals. I got you surprises. I gave you self confidence, strength and allowed you to love yourself. I rarely went out with friends. I never cheated. I never hit you. Never put you down. I let you do your thing. I let you be your own person. I never suffocated you. I always told you how beautiful you were. I always consoled you when you cried. I always stood up for you. Even after the breakup, I didn't let my friends badmouth you.

 

I'm gonna be a tough act to follow, babe. I helped make you who you are today. I was the catalyst for your change. You'll regret it. I'm not a perfect man, but I treated you damn good. We never went without.

 

 

Like I said before, I'm gonna be a tough act to follow. I know at some point you'll contact me. I'm f***** gone, darling. I saw you cry a few weeks ago when you randomly decided to come home while I was getting some files off the computer. It hurt to see you cry as always...but it felt f***ing good to see some emotion out of you over the situation.

 

Good luck.

[Balzac]

Go man Go!!!

 

Hey are you Penn as in Quaker?

Penn as in from Pennsylvania?

[lakerman34]

Three years. Three years and you throw me away like some piece of garbage. Well, guess what, sweetheart? You f**** up. I know I am not perfect and I have my flaws, but if watching too many sports and being too opinionated are my biggest issues, then good luck finding someone more suitable.

 

I waited on you hand and freaking foot. Will you do this...do that...get this? I always did. I always came home from work and kissed you. ALWAYS. It was one of the first things I did. I always said "I love you". I kept the house clean to the best of my ability. I cooked meals. I got you surprises. I gave you self confidence, strength and allowed you to love yourself. I rarely went out with friends. I never cheated. I never hit you. Never put you down. I let you do your thing. I let you be your own person. I never suffocated you. I always told you how beautiful you were. I always consoled you when you cried. I always stood up for you. Even after the breakup, I didn't let my friends badmouth you.

 

I'm gonna be a tough act to follow, babe. I helped make you who you are today. I was the catalyst for your change. You'll regret it. I'm not a perfect man, but I treated you damn good. We never went without.

 

 

Like I said before, I'm gonna be a tough act to follow. I know at some point you'll contact me. I'm f***** gone, darling. I saw you cry a few weeks ago when you randomly decided to come home while I was getting some files off the computer. It hurt to see you cry as always...but it felt f***ing good to see some emotion out of you over the situation.

 

Good luck.

 

I can relate. Treated my ex like a goddess, and she left me.

 

What can I say? Some people have such low confidence and low self-esteem that they mind**** themselves out of something beautiful. Just know that it wasn't you, even if she wants you to believe that. If you really treated her as special as you say you did, it was her and her issues that caused her to end the relationship.

 

When the next lady comes along, treat her just as well (but don't forget to have some time set aside for yourself and hanging out with your boys). If she's right for you, she'll appreciate everything you do for her and will reciprocate. Not like this one did, not like my ex did. They took us for granted, and one day, they'll look back and say 'damn, I lost a guy who really cared for me, and would give the world to me. I've made one of the biggest mistakes of my life.'

 

IDK how old you are, but I'm 22, my ex is 19. Maybe in 3 or 4 years when she grows up, she'll contact me and we can do coffee and see what happens. Maybe she'll mature. If you're older than that, then maybe you should just cut your losses, COMPLETELY NC, and let her deal with herself. At such a young age, girls look for the 'bad boys' and the ones that mistreat them. The better quality girls (when they are all grown up and mature) DO prefer the guys that treat them well and truly love them for their minds, not just their bodies.

 

My ex is dating a new guy. I used to be friends with him. I KNOW he wants her just for her body, and I KNOW in the end she's going to get ****ed. In my experience, though little as it may be, girls have a very difficult time keeping emotions separate from sex (as long as it isn't a one night stand and is a long going thing). All I'm saying is, don't be surprised if your ex is dating a new guy soon. She seems weak, and rebound relationships are what weak women do. Keep your head up, keep calm, and KNOW that you deserve better (and that you're probably better than her new BF).

[Treasa]

Hey, I can relate! I hope my unemployed, living-with-his-parents-at-30, uneducated ex (who really isn't even good looking) finds the perfect-looking supermodel he wants.

 

He hasn't had many girlfriends. I come along, and I'm funny, into video games, am VERY into sex, like sports and professional wrestling, was an athlete, and study martial arts and weapons. I also catered to him and adored the hell out of him. I spent my hard-earned money from my very good job on him.

 

Good luck finding someone else who will treat you that well and love you that much, sweetheart.

[PennGuy]

Penn as in from Pennsylvania.

 

 

Here's a continuation...

You turned into an excuse machine when I tried to reconcile things. "

 

"I am too dumb for someone smart like you....now you can finish your degree without worrying about me. Your family is perfect and mine is a wreck." It was like you were justifying it to yourself out loud with ****ty reasons.

 

Guess what, sweetheart? Relationships get routine....the lust dies down. The honeymoon isn't forever. I could be dating Megan Fox, but after Megan Fox gets out of the shower naked 500 times, it loses it's luster.

 

Go ahead and chase the long-distance ex with the his "Fast and Furious" car as his Facebook cover photo. He seems like a real grownup. Oh, yeah...he made out with you while you still were committed to me. A real man would've not stepped on another man's territory.

 

Maybe my best friend was right...you'll always date someone on your level or date "down". In spite of your upbringing, you came out head and shoulders above where you should be. But when Mom is married 4 or 5 times and Dad is married 3 times and he and his current wife don't even live together gives me the impression that you have no idea what normal is, or you run when s*** gets tough.

[Balzac]

Thanks for your response.

 

You're on a roll----let 'er rip wide open.

Great writing, spells it out very clearly.

[PennGuy]

I can relate. Treated my ex like a goddess, and she left me.

 

What can I say? Some people have such low confidence and low self-esteem that they mind**** themselves out of something beautiful. Just know that it wasn't you, even if she wants you to believe that. If you really treated her as special as you say you did, it was her and her issues that caused her to end the relationship.

 

When the next lady comes along, treat her just as well (but don't forget to have some time set aside for yourself and hanging out with your boys). If she's right for you, she'll appreciate everything you do for her and will reciprocate. Not like this one did, not like my ex did. They took us for granted, and one day, they'll look back and say 'damn, I lost a guy who really cared for me, and would give the world to me. I've made one of the biggest mistakes of my life.'

 

IDK how old you are, but I'm 22, my ex is 19. Maybe in 3 or 4 years when she grows up, she'll contact me and we can do coffee and see what happens. Maybe she'll mature. If you're older than that, then maybe you should just cut your losses, COMPLETELY NC, and let her deal with herself. At such a young age, girls look for the 'bad boys' and the ones that mistreat them. The better quality girls (when they are all grown up and mature) DO prefer the guys that treat them well and truly love them for their minds, not just their bodies.

 

My ex is dating a new guy. I used to be friends with him. I KNOW he wants her just for her body, and I KNOW in the end she's going to get ****ed. In my experience, though little as it may be, girls have a very difficult time keeping emotions separate from sex (as long as it isn't a one night stand and is a long going thing). All I'm saying is, don't be surprised if your ex is dating a new guy soon. She seems weak, and rebound relationships are what weak women do. Keep your head up, keep calm, and KNOW that you deserve better (and that you're probably better than her new BF).

 

I'm 30 and she is 27. I'm not saying I am perfect and there are times I put me before her, and she helped change me into a full grown man....and I love her so much for that. That's love. She makes me a better person. We had our arguments and fights, but everyone does.

 

Even during sex when she would have trouble coming, I was so unselfish I hated the thought of me finishing and her not. I was the first guy to make her orgasm 99 percent of the time we had sex. We would set Christmas budgets and I would always overspend, not because it showed I loved her more, but because I wanted to give her the world and see the look on her face when she opened her gifts.

[lakerman34]

It's weird how that happens, and I'm starting to believe it.

 

Girls have this ability to date 'what's right for them,' so to speak.

 

I KNOW I dated down. No doubt about it. My ex couldn't hold a candle to me. I'm going to be in medical school in a couple of months to become a CT surgeon, I'm classically handsome, tall, dark, VERY confident, athletic, have a little bit of badass in me, charming, have an IQ of 146, athletic, romantic, great in bed , love everybody and am very kind, VERY financially stable, a hard-worker, I can go ON and ON.

 

Her new boyfriend is about a year younger than me (closer in age with her), about 6 inches shorter than me, white as day, dresses 'fashionably,' pothead, has NO idea what he wants to do after college, walks funny, socially awkward, stoner, beach bum, looks like he's 10 years old, once again, I can go ON and ON.

 

She told me on D-Day that she couldn't keep up with me. True, she partly meant because I was moving the relationship really fast (which, in hindsight, she's right), but she also said that I'm so sure of myself and know where I'm going in life and she had no idea. She needed a guy JUST like that.

 

Her exact analogy, as I remember it, was: "If we were in a race, you already lapped me like 7 times, and I just can't keep up. Maybe in a couple of years, but right now, this is for the best."

 

Dude, I think your ex was FINALLY beginning to see that she just had it too good. She needs a guy that simply is on her level, and your above that. Now, whenever I see my ex (I make it a point to stay off her warpath because post-breakup got a little ugly), I smile at her, say 'sup,' because I see her as a girl that just isn't good enough to have me. I'm WAY out of her league, and I think she began to see that.

 

My ex did me a favor by dumping me, your ex probably did you a favor too.

 

Penn as in from Pennsylvania.

 

 

Here's a continuation...

You turned into an excuse machine when I tried to reconcile things. "

 

"I am too dumb for someone smart like you....now you can finish your degree without worrying about me. Your family is perfect and mine is a wreck." It was like you were justifying it to yourself out loud with ****ty reasons.

 

Guess what, sweetheart? Relationships get routine....the lust dies down. The honeymoon isn't forever. I could be dating Megan Fox, but after Megan Fox gets out of the shower naked 500 times, it loses it's luster.

 

Go ahead and chase the long-distance ex with the his "Fast and Furious" car as his Facebook cover photo. He seems like a real grownup. Oh, yeah...he made out with you while you still were committed to me. A real man would've not stepped on another man's territory.

 

Maybe my best friend was right...you'll always date someone on your level or date "down". In spite of your upbringing, you came out head and shoulders above where you should be. But when Mom is married 4 or 5 times and Dad is married 3 times and he and his current wife don't even live together gives me the impression that you have no idea what normal is, or you run when s*** gets tough.

[bpdr]

I'm gonna be a tough act to follow, babe. I helped make you who you are today. I was the catalyst for your change. You'll regret it. I'm not a perfect man, but I treated you damn good. We never went without.

 

 

Like I said before, I'm gonna be a tough act to follow. I know at some point you'll contact me. I'm f***** gone, darling. I saw you cry a few weeks ago when you randomly decided to come home while I was getting some files off the computer. It hurt to see you cry as always...but it felt f***ing good to see some emotion out of you over the situation.

 

Good luck.

 

Thatta boy! Good job. Spelled out in very layman terminology... BRAVO!

[bpdr]

Hey, I can relate! I hope my unemployed, living-with-his-parents-at-30, uneducated ex (who really isn't even good looking) finds the perfect-looking supermodel he wants.

 

He hasn't had many girlfriends. I come along, and I'm funny, into video games, am VERY into sex, like sports and professional wrestling, was an athlete, and study martial arts and weapons. I also catered to him and adored the hell out of him. I spent my hard-earned money from my very good job on him.

 

Good luck finding someone else who will treat you that well and love you that much, sweetheart.

 

I'm with ya! Nice job! Great Analogy!

[PennGuy]

Yeah.....I don't know why at 6 weeks post-breakup that I'm feeling like I was the 2nd week. I'm back to being super-emotional. I'm not sleeping right again. The only thing I can attribute it to is now that I am in my own place and all my stuff is out, it's over. There's no reason to contact her. The apartment we picked out is now her apartment. All of our pictures are down. She took over all the space in our closet.

 

I saw this person daily for three years. I slept beside them for three years. I feel so alien right now. When something happened, I had them to turn to or tell.

[bpdr]

Yeah.....I don't know why at 6 weeks post-breakup that I'm feeling like I was the 2nd week. I'm back to being super-emotional. I'm not sleeping right again. The only thing I can attribute it to is now that I am in my own place and all my stuff is out, it's over. There's no reason to contact her. The apartment we picked out is now her apartment. All of our pictures are down. She took over all the space in our closet.

 

I saw this person daily for three years. I slept beside them for three years. I feel so alien right now. When something happened, I had them to turn to or tell.

 

I tend to think after the initial anger wears off - a time of emotional grief spurts sinks in mixed with anxiety and depression. Think about it, three years of your life has been wrapped around the notion of staying together for the long haul. Now that it has ended - acceptance is the only part that remains, and perhaps some bitterness about how badly things ended.

 

I'm going through the same exact tidal wave of emotions as well very close to the same timeline as yours. It's the lack of sleep that drives me most crazy. Waking up is never easy. But, that's the way it is now. Time to move on and get going on being happy for ourselves now.

 

I'm with ya, and you are feeling perfectly normal about the loss of it all.

 

Good luck

BP