rie05 Posted November 26, 2012 Posted November 26, 2012 Hi again (Please see my previous post for more info) Basically since then..... I had one week of no contact. After one week I contacted him via email to ask him for a resignation letter (required by law) as he had left without notice. The email was professional and almost immediately he contacted me via text saying "yep, when I've got the time". I replied and asked if he could collect his things too, to which I got the same answer plus "then you can be well rid". Anyway I couldn't help myself and this spiralled into an argument. We agreed to meet that night and I met him outside my house. He was waiting in the car. I got in the car and we talked but all I really got out of him was a pack of lies. He said he had a job at 1:30am (he is minicab driver) but he had his PDA turned off so he obviously was not working. His mobile rang 3 times at 1:30am and I asked him to see the phone. He refused. After the fourth call he gave in and showed me it was the girl he had been in the car with previously. He tried to say it was "just a job" and pretty much chucked me out of the car leaving me in tears. At this point, I should of left it alone....... But I couldn't. I thought I seriously needed to find out the whole truth. I know I knew enough already. Anyway I had a device logged into his iMessage. So I connected it to a wifi connection. After 48 hours of messages I really wish I never saw them!!! So if it wasn't bad enough that he was seeing girl number 1 (21) he was also screwing the receptionist (18) at the mini cab company. There was cold hard evidence in front of me. At this point I just saw red and photoshopped the messages into one picture and sent it to both girls so they would know what a scum bag he was.....!! OK -- not the greatest of ideas!! I was so angry and another week elapsed without a word to one another. He sent me a text saying "when will you not be home do I can collect my things". I replied to him saying what day I would not be home and to leave the keys behind. I really should have walked away at this point.....! But no -- I had to act like a door mat!!! He texted back saying "I have seen your true character!" This sent me into orbit because after all, I was the committed one to the relationship.... Anyway I know this whole thing sounds ridiculous!! But it still gets worse!! I phoned him and somehow for whatever reason I asked him to come to my house.... Sigh... So yeah after everything... I had sex with him. I was so cross with myself. But in the back of my mind I was saying goodbye. Of course -- this didn't change anything. I had been speaking to my friend about the whole situation (who was a ex-boyfriend 5 years ago). After crying to him for days about my current-ex. He was angry I chose to sleep with him. There was nothing between us what so ever.... Anyway somehow he got my exs number and started texting him, threatening him!! Obviously I went nuts!! In hindsight I should of never spoke to him about it...!! But now my ex absolutely hates me. Not that he was confessing his love to come back before. However he admitted he had been seeing her for a month. Sigh. I have been made out to be the bad one in all of this... I'm guessing I should just walk away from it all and not give a **** what he thinks!!
flitzanu Posted November 26, 2012 Posted November 26, 2012 so your ex is sleeping with other people, and you banged him and your friend, so what exactly is the problem? you can't cry "foul" for doing the same thing that he's doing.
Author rie05 Posted November 26, 2012 Author Posted November 26, 2012 No I did not sleep with anyone else. I was just talking about my relationship.
geegirl Posted November 26, 2012 Posted November 26, 2012 I don't blame him for his actions. He was just doing what he does best. Juggle women. And even after finding that out, you give him sex! Stop analyzing him. You're the problem. Start focusing on you and what about you believes you deserve to stoop to such levels to make this scumbag want you. Find your self-respect and move on.
Author rie05 Posted November 26, 2012 Author Posted November 26, 2012 I don't blame him for his actions. He was just doing what he does best. Juggle women. And even after finding that out, you give him sex! Stop analyzing him. You're the problem. Start focusing on you and what about you believes you deserve to stoop to such levels to make this scumbag want you. Find your self-respect and move on. I guess that's me told, huh!!! I guess I thought on some stupid level, that if we has wonderful sex with me, he would remember what he loved about me.... but of course I was horribly wrong. He has me dangeling on a shoe string and I have let him.
geegirl Posted November 26, 2012 Posted November 26, 2012 I guess that's me told, huh!!! I guess I thought on some stupid level, that if we has wonderful sex with me, he would remember what he loved about me.... but of course I was horribly wrong. He has me dangeling on a shoe string and I have let him. Never entice a man with sex. He has to love and want you for far more than what you can offer between the sheets. Sex isn't love. Sex is sex when it comes to guys like your ex.
Author rie05 Posted November 26, 2012 Author Posted November 26, 2012 Never entice a man with sex. He has to love and want you for far more than what you can offer between the sheets. You are 100% right... I guess I did that, as that's what I thought he was after from the other girls.... Should I just leave him to it now? He sent me all that bullsh*t about him needing time and maybe in the future we don't know what will happen. I guess that's just leaving me as his back-up plan I need to get my self respect back!!
geegirl Posted November 26, 2012 Posted November 26, 2012 Should I just leave him to it now? He sent me all that bullsh*t about him needing time and maybe in the future we don't know what will happen. I guess that's just leaving me as his back-up plan I need to get my self respect back!! You're asking if you should leave him to it now? I'm about to come through this screen and bonk you on the head! You get away from him, permanently. He is no good for you. Aim higher. Seek better. Do you truly believe this is the best you can do? Let this one go. If you keep allowing him to bait you, you're teaching him that you're okay with being treated as an option. No self-respecting woman is going to allow scum into her life, especially one that has exhibited scum behavior. Move on. It's time to shut the door on this assclown.
Author rie05 Posted November 26, 2012 Author Posted November 26, 2012 You're asking if you should leave him to it now? I'm about to come through this screen and bonk you on the head! You get away from him, permanently. He is no good for you. Aim higher. Seek better. Do you truly believe this is the best you can do? Let this one go. If you keep allowing him to bait you, you're teaching him that you're okay with being treated as an option. No self-respecting woman is going to allow scum into her life, especially one that has exhibited scum behavior. Move on. It's time to shut the door on this assclown. Think I need a bonk on the head!! I should have left it alone two weeks ago!! Now I just look stupid!
geegirl Posted November 26, 2012 Posted November 26, 2012 Think I need a bonk on the head!! I should have left it alone two weeks ago!! Now I just look stupid! Look rie, I caught my ex having sex in some woman's car. Right before my very eyes. Next morning, I'm in denial. Then he calls and says it wasn't what I think it was. For a moment, I'm sold! I forgot my reality. You found his stained pants. Keep visualizing that whenever you get emotional. Then puke and get mad. Remind yourself of who this man really is. We all make unwise decisions when we are emotional. Don't punish yourself. You did what you did and all you can do now is dust off and move on. Please, please know you deserve better. But bonk yourself on the head when you're bargaining with yourself about this guy and wondering if you should leave him alone for now.
Author rie05 Posted November 26, 2012 Author Posted November 26, 2012 Look rie, I caught my ex having sex in some woman's car. Right before my very eyes. Next morning, I'm in denial. Then he calls and says it wasn't what I think it was. For a moment, I'm sold! I forgot my reality. You found his stained pants. Keep visualizing that whenever you get emotional. Then puke and get mad. Remind yourself of who this man really is. We all make unwise decisions when we are emotional. Don't punish yourself. You did what you did and all you can do now is dust off and move on. Please, please know you deserve better. But bonk yourself on the head when you're bargaining with yourself about this guy and wondering if you should leave him alone for now. Yeah -- I caught him in the car too. The first night he came back with the stained pants and the second night I caught him in the car. I know I deserve better but my emotions were just getting the better of me! I need to forget and move on! Thanks for your input!
geegirl Posted November 26, 2012 Posted November 26, 2012 Yeah -- I caught him in the car too. This is all you needed. Put on those big girl panties, suffer the emotions and pains and move on. Nothing is worse than settling for a cheater because you're too afraid to face your truth.
flitzanu Posted November 27, 2012 Posted November 27, 2012 No I did not sleep with anyone else. I was just talking about my relationship. oh wait, sorry, i misread what you said, you were talking to your OLD ex and HE was angry that you slept with your ex. i thought you meant you were angry, and slept with your OLD ex.
flitzanu Posted November 27, 2012 Posted November 27, 2012 Never entice a man with sex. He has to love and want you for far more than what you can offer between the sheets. Sex isn't love. Sex is sex when it comes to guys like your ex. everyone pay attention here. SEX DOES NOT EQUAL EMOTION!
Author rie05 Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 everyone pay attention here. SEX DOES NOT EQUAL EMOTION! Yes... This is true! He collected all his things and left his keys yesterday. He text me saying "I've collected my things and put the keys through the letterbox". I didn't reply and got another saying "Is that it?" I was busy at work so I didn't reply and he sent one more saying could I let him know if he has any post. I replied "Yeah that's it. Sure (post)." He replied "Unbelievable" What the hell does he expect?? To dangle me on a show string. I don't think so.
flitzanu Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 ever watch/listen to Dane Cook? he mentions that in one of his shows...the male motto is "unbelievable" when it comes to girls. haha. boys get mad when they have you wrapped around their finger...and then you wise up and leave. expect a lot of nasty insults and immature behavior to follow.
Author rie05 Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 ever watch/listen to Dane Cook? he mentions that in one of his shows...the male motto is "unbelievable" when it comes to girls. haha. boys get mad when they have you wrapped around their finger...and then you wise up and leave. expect a lot of nasty insults and immature behavior to follow. Very interesting!! He is the unbelievable one! Anyway I haven't text him and I haven't heard from him Everytime I feel sad I look at this thread!! I'm not going to be wrapped around his little finger anymore! 1
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