packersgirl Posted August 8, 2004 Posted August 8, 2004 Love is a choice. When I first heard that, I thought that was just ridiculous. I mean, how could I possibly just decide one day to love someone forever? I thought of my ex-boyfriend and realized that even though I love him in Christ, I could never decide to one day wake up and be in love with him. If ya'll knew my ex you'd understand, but still, the thought seemed down right absurd. About a month ago, I started accepting the fact that love IS a choice. I choose to love my family even when things get tough, I choose to love my friends when they are being insensitive and difficult, all in all, I choose to love. Now for the second part of my title. The shack... LoveShack of course Over the course of about 6 months I have been struggling with issues of dating and love. This place is amazing and I'm so glad I found it... but everytime I come here, for some odd reason, I feel bad for not dating this one guy who likes me. I don't know what it is, but for nearly a month I had to stop reading and posting because I needed to move on. Weird huh? What did I have to move on from? I'm still not sure. I know that I am so emotionally attached to this guy, but not attracted to him in any sence. He's one of my closest friends... maybe thats why I felt bad for not dating him, because I was causing him pain. Nonetheless, I have come to a realization. I love him. I'm not in love with him, and nor do I see a marital future with him, but I love him. Maybe thats how loves a choice, I wake up every day and choose to love him as a friend, to the best of my ability. Though some days I fail, and some days I don't even see or talk to him, I still know in my heart that I choose to love him, in a strictly platonic way. I have the pleasure of working with a lot of my close friends, one of which I know very well from my church. She knows me pretty much inside and out, as I know her the same. We started talking and we got on the subject of my all-time best friend. I only call him that because over the past 3 years he has stuck by my side like glue and has been everything I could ever ask for in a friend, and more. He and I go together like peanut butter and jelly, only better. And she thinks, and always has thought, that I am in love with him... About a month and a half ago, I found out he was engaged. Two weeks ago, I found out he's moving out of state. Yesterday it all finally hit me. Choosing to love with him is a whole different story. I love him with all my heart. Each day that I wake up, and I know I'm going to see him, a part of me comes alive that usually stays asleep any other day. Loving him is easy, the difference with him is that I choose not to be in love with him. God has granted me peace, and I am finally ready to let him go. He will always be my all-time best friend, and I will always love him, but as a friend in Christ and nothing more. Realizing all this has made me even more ready to give my love to someone else, someone who'll choose to love me back the way I love them. So, I patiently wait for my Prince Charming. As you can see, I have made a few important realizations this past month, and each one of those has made me more ready to face the future, whatever it may hold. Don't you just love that? When you realize something thats been under your nose for a while? It honestly feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders and now I can see things more clearly...
Pocky Posted August 9, 2004 Posted August 9, 2004 I agree that love is a choice. We have more control over our hearts than we sometimes want to believe.
Curt Posted August 9, 2004 Moderators Posted August 9, 2004 You know what packersgirl, this statement you made brilliantly: Each day that I wake up, and I know I'm going to see him, a part of me comes alive that usually stays asleep any other day. It also really exemplifies how being around Karen really made me feel too. I don't think it was since high school that I truly felt that way about anyone except her. She made my heart leap with happiness and excitement. When that feeling is extinguished, it really is gone in a big way. Thanks for putting the idea into words so well.
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