Toddbt12y1 Posted November 23, 2012 Posted November 23, 2012 Hey all, Sorry if this is the wrong forum to post this. I was in a long distance for four years and a half. I would go see my g/f many times throughout our relationship. Well, to make this short, she ended up cheated on me, by the fourth year. At first, I rarely heard from her, she was always pre-occupied(family, according to her.) Well, I didn't really get to see her for most of the Summer; she was always busy with her family or friends. So, she makes a promise to spend August with me, but breaks it to go spend time with her Aunt, at some cabin. I was not too happy about not getting to see her, but I was calm. Later, she would promise to spend a Friday with me, but ended up breaking that promise(saying her dad was with her.) This upset me, so we argued, I hadn't seend her in so long, after all. Anyway, one day I get this txt from this boy, saying, "Leave my g/f alone stalker." So, we argued, and broke up for a bit, she defended him, saying it couldn't have been(this guy we both knew it was), hes a nice guy. It only got worse, as some days she would tell me how she's seen hotter guys than me. Which only caused us to argue. I ended up forgiving her, and like a fool believing her. Strangely, one Sunday, a while ago, she started to text me a lot, and act super nice, wanting to see me. I later found out that guy had moved away, so I guess that was why. But it didn't last long, she ended up finding this other boy, a punk; who boasted about selling drugs, and having runins with the law: One day, I went to play pool with some friends, and she got jealous, for whatever reason(I told her I went to play pool.) And then said she was in a motel with this boy, and it "felt" good. Which badly upset me, but like a fool in love, I forgave her. I would later buy her several gifts for Christmas, and her bday(speaking of which, she said she got me a gift for my bday, but later lied and said a check bounced and I never saw that gift.) Anyhoo, I saw her on a webcam, getting my gifts, and she didn't even put them on, not even the expensive ring with our names on it(not a wedding ring.) But she had some golden-heart pendant on, and later picked off the floor a necklace I had brought her years before; then commented that she couldn't wear my stuff, cause it was cheap(some of it was, but that was only another cheap necklace, that I just threw in for her...) So, she didn't wear my stuff; but I asked her about that golden heart pendant she wore around her neck, and her other gifts, of a teddy bear, etc, she said they came from her mom. That night we where going to spend together, but she was constantly on her phone, and I told her to tell them she is spending time with me(I didn't go see her at this time due to work, but was over cam), but she onyl lowered her phone to where I could barely see her txting. I was mad, and logged out. She apologized, so like a fool I took her back. Later, I would buy her very expensive, 200$ flowers, but they ended up being sent to her neighbours, and when she was told this, she waited days before going to go get them: by this time they where a little wilted. Then she just said "thank you..." then nothing else. Later I would buy her mroe flowers, and she would do the same. (sorry I am trying to make this short and am new to this).. Her mom didn't like me much either, and said I was a killer, which wasn't true, and helped in breaking us up. But it didn't work. I was set to go and see her again, by this Fall, but I had the unfortunate pleasure of discovering an email(she gave me her email, linked it to mine, to try to get me to see she wasn't cheating.) But I found a profile of her mom on that account, and clicked it: it brought up all the other profiles, including two different ones of my g/f. Both had guys on it, and one had a guy on it she said she wasn't friends with at all, them flirting. She tried to play it off as that accounting being shared with her sister, but it had her phone number on it. Later, she would try to prove herself five times, but by then it was too late...even though when she tried to prove herself to me, she sent me a pic of her fb, and it had "i love *guy*" on it she had sent to me, with a circle and arrow pointed to it. Then she said someone hacked her fb, and did that, and later sent another showing she loved me. Anyway, it ended on the weekend when she said she was going to hangout with friends, over me, when we hadn't seen each other in a while... Now I feel constantly depressed, though I think I am making strides, but what bothers me is that she seems so utterly happy, after all the bad she's done and hasn't paid for what she's done. Don't get me wrong, I know her happiness shouldn't matter, but, neither should she get by with it...that's life I guess....I also deeply love her, despite what it may have seen, and I could have gotten revenge, but I didn't. I had pics. But I loved her dearly, and forgave her often....I know this thread sounds retarded and it is...But I am new to this, and am trying to shorten it(she did a lot more.) I wonder if she ever will regret it, or at least be sorry? Sorry if this isn't in the right place...
Alban Posted November 24, 2012 Posted November 24, 2012 Don't ever talk to this whore again, she is scum and that's never good for you. Try to move on, go out with friends, play playstation whatever, but don't sit at home and try to get things right like that, it will not work ! I hope you'll get better, you seem to be a nice guy, ****ed up by a ****ing bitch. 1
blugirl Posted November 24, 2012 Posted November 24, 2012 Man, have some pride and walk away from that mess, INSTANTLY!!! She's totally getting use of you as her boy-toy, she disrespects you like hell - how could you even forgive her ****ing some other guy?!?!?! She doesn't bother to give you a present, while you treat her like a princess?!?! You must have some serious lack of confidence, no person in their right mind would let themselves be treated like a doormat!! I understand that you're in love with her but there are some BORDERS!!! Just cut her away and no contact, block her everywhere. No future with this bitch. 3
Author Toddbt12y1 Posted November 25, 2012 Author Posted November 25, 2012 (edited) I am truly thank-ful for the answers you two have given me; you both are right. Fact is I haven't been acting much like a man; truth is, I never forgave her for screwing other guys(sorry if it came off that way, I was saying I forgave her of her other cruel things she had done.) It took a lot of time and investigation to un-cover the truth, or I would have left her sooner...I have been a mess over this, but friends are helping me already inviting me out. For a while I wasn't wanting to go anywhere, but have decided to do so. So far I have been to the beach and other places.... I was going to marry-her, but I best forget about all that, and try to take your advices to heart: I deeply, deeply am thankful to you both for your words, it is real, and that is something I needed to hear, real words telling me how it is. P.s. thank you for reading that huge mess, and a lot of other bad things she has done was left out, but it needn't even be said. I feel great to have advice I needed it! But I was mainly burden by the thoughts she will get by with it all, granted it doesn't matter...i know, but one cannot help but think such things... Edited November 25, 2012 by Toddbt12y1 1
Alban Posted November 25, 2012 Posted November 25, 2012 I am truly thank-ful for the answers you two have given me; you both are right. Fact is I haven't been acting much like a man; truth is, I never forgave her for screwing other guys(sorry if it came off that way, I was saying I forgave her of her other cruel things she had done.) It took a lot of time and investigation to un-cover the truth, or I would have left her sooner...I have been a mess over this, but friends are helping me already inviting me out. For a while I wasn't wanting to go anywhere, but have decided to do so. So far I have been to the beach and other places.... I was going to marry-her, but I best forget about all that, and try to take your advices to heart: I deeply, deeply am thankful to you both for your words, it is real, and that is something I needed to hear, real words telling me how it is. P.s. thank you for reading that huge mess, and a lot of other bad things she has done was left out, but it needn't even be said. I feel great to have advice I needed it! But I was mainly burden by the thoughts she will get by with it all, granted it doesn't matter...i know, but one cannot help but think such things... Just don't think about her believe be it's better, you have to go out, have a nice time with friends, take some girls out and it will be alright. Time heals my friend we all here know how hard it is to leave someone you love, but you have to go through this pain, eventually with time you'll forget.. 1
Author Toddbt12y1 Posted November 25, 2012 Author Posted November 25, 2012 You are very right Alban. For the longest time I have not followed people's advice; or rarely did. And it has costed me emotionally. But lately I have been doing my best to follow people's advice, which is why I am here...to hear advance from caring strangers, and believe me I will follow everyones' advice. I have mourned long enough, and I will make every effort to be as active and to prevent any down time to allow for thoughts of her to pop in my mind... I cannot thank you enough for your comments/help so thank you so much! I know you are right. I must practice everyones' advice, yours included. 2
blugirl Posted November 26, 2012 Posted November 26, 2012 (edited) Good There is nothing more frustrating than seeing someone ruin their future/life, following a wrong, destructive path (or person ). Thus I'm glad to see you actually taking our pieces of advice into consideration ^^ You need to have a lot of confidence and be aware of your self-worth first and believe that you are worth a good, kind girl who is a perfect match for you. She is out there somewhere, waiting till you figure yourself out so she can appear in your life ^^ Just treat what happened as a hard lesson and move on, wiser. That's how we grow up. Wishu everything best~! Edited November 26, 2012 by blugirl 1
Author Toddbt12y1 Posted November 27, 2012 Author Posted November 27, 2012 Thank you Blugirl! I am glad to see that there are still people, even people I don't know willing to help a stranger out in need. I will be confident, just as you say. I have been down long enough, loving someone doesn't mean staying down forever, because they are not right. I didn't realize it for a while...I do now. I realize so much, thanks to people like you and Alban, friends and family. Hey, it is making me wiser, soon I might be able to help people in the same boat as me, just as you have helped me, and Alban has on here. Ty so much hugs**
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