Ruby Slippers Posted November 27, 2012 Posted November 27, 2012 melody, you rule! And here's where all my romantic fancies have gotten me: this weekend, after some big talks about the future which covered some of our differences, my strong, sexy fella cooked me a delicious dinner, then spent the rest of the evening wrapped around me like a winter coat - legs, arms, full body and all, kissing me all over, telling me that he would be very, very, very sad if this didn't work out, and we'll figure out how to make everything work. The next night on the phone, he sang "We Shall Overcome" to me about 5 times, making me laugh over and over again, when before I was feeling sad and uncertain. And he wrote me a little love poem last week. The way I see it, I'm definitely doing something right! 5
CptSaveAho Posted November 27, 2012 Posted November 27, 2012 Hey, NP can group me in with all of y'all, except instead of finding problems I marry the dudes One died tragically after 11 very happy months and I have now been BLISSFULLY married for over a year to F ( after a 7 week courtship in which he moved in after our first date) and just this morning, half asleep, when he wrapped his arms around me, I thought to myself " It doesn't matter where in the world I am as long as I have this mans arms around me". We seldom argue and probably tell each other how much we love each other 20 times a day, actions AND words.(That's us in my avatar) So, go for it Tigressa !!!!!!!! "Fake it till you make it" comes to mind
Author tigressA Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 (edited) melody, you rule! And here's where all my romantic fancies have gotten me: this weekend, after some big talks about the future which covered some of our differences, my strong, sexy fella cooked me a delicious dinner, then spent the rest of the evening wrapped around me like a winter coat - legs, arms, full body and all, kissing me all over, telling me that he would be very, very, very sad if this didn't work out, and we'll figure out how to make everything work. The next night on the phone, he sang "We Shall Overcome" to me about 5 times, making me laugh over and over again, when before I was feeling sad and uncertain. And he wrote me a little love poem last week. The way I see it, I'm definitely doing something right! Ruby, that's so sweet! He's totally smitten. Mine wrote a poem for me before we met and gave it to me our first night together. I carry it in my purse every day and sometimes take it out to read it. He said a couple of times he's really looking forward to having me come see him again so I can wake up in his bed and he can cook for me and bring me cups of tea, haha. (We were at a hotel that first weekend--.) And I'm really excited to have him here with me this weekend. I want to show him a great time and take care of him. He is very affectionate, almost even more than I am. We're at least holding hands when we're walking around together. He 'keeps tabs' on me when we're sleeping; he changes position when I do so he is cuddling me all night. I've never had that before. And when he looks at me (which is a lot!) my face gets hot and I giggle and have to look away for a second or two because it's so overwhelmingly passionate, like he always wants to drag me off to a hidden place and f*ck me. I love it. OK, that's all the detail I'm posting for awhile! Edited November 28, 2012 by tigressA 2
Ariadne Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 he's really looking forward to having me come see him again (We were at a hotel that first weekend--.) he always wants to drag me off to a hidden place and f*ck me. I love it. This is so sexy T! Enjoy the romance. 2
Ruby Slippers Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 OK, that's all the detail I'm posting for awhile! More more more!! 1
Author tigressA Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 More more more!! OK, OK--just a little! We were on Skype earlier and he said the cutest thing about how he missed thinking of me. I said, "Wait...what?" since it didn't make sense at first. He said there are times during the day when he has to think of things other than me, and when that happens, he misses thinking of me. Super-cute. Oh and you're in my contacts--go to my profile Now seriously, that is ALL! 1
Ruby Slippers Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 He said there are times during the day when he has to think of things other than me, and when that happens, he misses thinking of me. *vomit* But I love it. hahaha Helloooo, sexy! You and your guy look so blissed-out together 1
Author tigressA Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 *vomit* But I love it. hahaha Helloooo, sexy! You and your guy look so blissed-out together Yeah, he's quite dreamy 1
threebyfate Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Sometimes, when it's right, it's right. This is coming from someone who would have told you the complete opposite before meeting her husband. Best wishes to you! 5
NYCGirly Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 I, too, have been following your adventures in dating (went by a different user name in 2006) ever since your days with "C". Very happy for you! I will give my own anecdotal evidence that this could be true love in that I also met my guy (now fiance) on OKC. We emailed for about a week then went on 5 dates 5 days in a row and knew we were each other's "one". We exchanged "I love you's" after 2 weeks. We are currently buying a home together and trying for our first child after being together for 6 months now. Honestly, when you know, you know. Everyone is different. Best of luck! 1
Eternal Sunshine Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Having a passionate character like T, I suspect this is the way it will happen for me. When I don't feel like seeing/talking to the guy all the time, I know I am settling. 2
AlexDP Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Tomorrow in the morning I have an info session at Planned Parenthood. On the 17th I will go back to PP to undergo and be instructed on the procedure for medical abortion (the pills, not surgical). It's been 29 days since the start of my last period. I had a positive pregnancy test and implantation spotting yesterday. I haven't been able to eat much--not from nausea, just stress; and I have had a few violent mood swings. My ex, who is the 'father'--I feel weird about using that word, since I feel like it should only be associated with a baby, and I don't have a baby; I have a miniscule little embryo--has insisted on footing the bill for all this. He feels guilty; he thinks it's all his fault, but it was an accident. After trying to convince him and failing, I've decided to let it go and allow him to assuage his guilt in whatever way he feels he needs to. I looked up medical abortion posts on forums. A lot of them are nightmarish--heavy bleeding, huge clots, very painful cramps, vomiting, fever. Some were more positive. Logically I know how my body will react to it is dependent on, well, MY body, and no one else. But it's still really f*cking scary. I'm expecting the worst and hoping for the best. Or trying to. The worst would be finding out the procedure failed. Horrendous side effects are little to me compared to finding out I would have to undergo a second procedure. I'm thinking about who is going to know about this. My ex of course already knows. I told a close friend from college as well, and my brother. My brother scared me by saying I can't ever tell our father or anyone else in our family because he and they would flip their lid. I've always been my dad's little girl, his princess. I do wonder if I can ever tell him. I already feel horrible about keeping it from him. I feel like he should've been one of the first to know, and he isn't. I'm spilling this on a forum before going to him. I'm already pretty wracked with guilt over that. It's also strange to know that I will possibly, depending on my reaction to the medication, be sitting at my little cubicle doing my job while inside my body, there's work being done to destroy what has been growing for weeks. I could be productive on the outside, making things happen, while on the inside, something is ending. *****Note: Please, please, PLEASE don't make this about being pro-choice or pro-life. It is already decided and I am NOT changing my mind. This is strictly about my thoughts and feelings regarding this procedure--venting, confessing. I do welcome and appreciate any support offered. This was October. We are now November.
Ninjainpajamas Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Hey, NP can group me in with all of y'all, except instead of finding problems I marry the dudes One died tragically after 11 very happy months and I have now been BLISSFULLY married for over a year to F ( after a 7 week courtship in which he moved in after our first date) and just this morning, half asleep, when he wrapped his arms around me, I thought to myself " It doesn't matter where in the world I am as long as I have this mans arms around me". We seldom argue and probably tell each other how much we love each other 20 times a day, actions AND words.(That's us in my avatar) So, go for it Tigressa !!!!!!!! Well first I'm sorry to hear about your experience in that tragedy, it must have been very difficult to get through his passing. The funny thing is what most of you don't know is I'm speaking from the side of experience, instead of an outside perspective. I know know exactly what you are talking about because... I am/was that guy!....but way crazier/more intense on very likely every level. At least in the past...the majority of things I've read from Ruby (that I recall) posts as well as TigressA, I've been there done that or twice that, or much more over the top...affectionate, romantic, charming, sweet, intense, expressive, passionate are my specialty. I was a complete diver to the fifth degree...I rolled around in it like a fat pig and soaked it up, "love" or what I thought was love, was something I lived for and had to have. So I know what It's all about, I've been there, done that, I've felt that, I've experienced it and then some. So that might tell you a little bit about why I speak from my perspective, I know EXACTLY how it works. I'm not the kind of guy that many people likely paint me out to be here, my romantic history is crazy. I've been through so much, I've been in relationships since I was 13 almost non-stop, loved, been in love...never had a hard time finding it. In fact that only reason I had any desire to join a website like LS was because for the first time in my life I had taken a break before that to do something different, stop perpetuating the cycle because my romantic life was a huge part of my life, that is why I understand so much about men and women...and I've always been an analytical guy...I'm a contradiction...I'm a super "romantic"/super realist...but ultimately I'd rather know the truth than believe in the fantasy, but I'd like to believe there is more to it than what I see...that's where I'm at now and not doing back flips over falling for someone because I could easily go out and get that and I and apart me would love to. So imagine it this way...years from now (hypothetically speaking) TigressA is no longer with this guy, Rubyslippers is no longer with her guy, and melodymatters, your relationship fell out of the honey moon stage and he met someone else and it's in the past. Now all three of these guys combine into one guy, join some random forum on the loveshack and now they go by the name of Ninjainpajamas...do you understand who you are talking to now? What would you ask that guy? hmmm and what do you think he would say, and what knowledge and experience would he have if he could actually articulate and express himself well? Yes, yes of course I'm not those men because I don't know how they feel (which is always the excuse I get), but I've been through what they've been through emotionally and romantically and then some. I can relate to that experience like if were in the same car accident together. And guess what, I can answer a lot of questions about men because of that and because of the many men I've either associated with and talk to about personal matters throughout my life, and I'd be willing to wager I understand women better than all three of these guys combined. And If I haven't been that guy, I've definitely talk to that guy or you know what...my advice on this forum would be utter crap. So when people say "oh you're wrong, you don't know all men or I don't agree with everything you're saying" chances are, I've had some really good real life, hands on experience with that situation more times than once to have learned how it goes, that's why I see the inner "matrix" of all of this, the majority of it is on such a basic human and primitive level I can't fathom how people can label it such a mystery and be so "confused", millions of guys do the exact same behavior every day but I guess that guy is different from the reset even though he does textbook almost identical behavior...it's happening all of the time, all around you, and not just on LS like some people like to say this is some foreign planet...people like that are always "surprised" when Bobby and Jessica's relationship wasn't so perfect and there was cheating the whole time ::gasp:: who'd have thought...people are not as perfect and put together as they appear on the outside. In fact without being able to see through it, you like assume a persons relationship is much better than it actually is...relationships takes work, they are difficult, things change and evolve...it just doesn't stay "perfect" and the same...yet people look at others relationships all the time and hold it to an example, it's silly. The only exception is I haven't experienced is being married, and that's probably thanks to my parents traumatic divorce. Otherwise I've had multiple LTR which were closer than a lot of peoples actual marriages from the type of feedback I've gotten from married men and women alike. So yeah maybe, just maybe I know a little bit how you ladies work and can see what you're doing that you're not aware of yourself even doing, you would be surprised what I know...I don't even show all of my cards on Loveshack, not even close. Just thought I'd make that a little bit more clearer so maybe you'd understand why I say some of the things I do and offer my perspective, maybe I'm trying to give you some clues from the other guys perspective on what to watch out for and how to understand yourself and how your issues play into it and more importantly how to protect yourself because of what I "see" going on, maybe I can relate more than you think. Anyway, continue on with the mush fest 5
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 I'm sorry but it just sounds like too much... Like he is doing too much you're doing too much all of you are doing TOO much, like dont get me wrong it's cute but its too much. Who acts like this?? I mean I guess in my first relationship I probably did but that was a first time thing, I would think as someone whose dated before and been in relationships before you would go slow and chill. I mean these stories of dating for 5 days and marrying a month later at cute but 50 years from now where will you be?? Probably not with with person you married after a day and a half, especially of you met them online. I'm just being realistic.
Eternal Sunshine Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 I'm sorry but it just sounds like too much... Like he is doing too much you're doing too much all of you are doing TOO much, like dont get me wrong it's cute but its too much. Who acts like this?? I mean I guess in my first relationship I probably did but that was a first time thing, I would think as someone whose dated before and been in relationships before you would go slow and chill. I mean these stories of dating for 5 days and marrying a month later at cute but 50 years from now where will you be?? Probably not with with person you married after a day and a half, especially of you met them online. I'm just being realistic. No need to be jealous P.S. If you only knew how hot this guy is...insane 1
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 No need to be jealous P.S. If you only knew how hot this guy is...insane Jealous of what? Haha I can guarantee I probably wouldn't think he is hot.. I'm picky.
Author tigressA Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 I, too, have been following your adventures in dating (went by a different user name in 2006) ever since your days with "C". Very happy for you! I will give my own anecdotal evidence that this could be true love in that I also met my guy (now fiance) on OKC. We emailed for about a week then went on 5 dates 5 days in a row and knew we were each other's "one". We exchanged "I love you's" after 2 weeks. We are currently buying a home together and trying for our first child after being together for 6 months now. Honestly, when you know, you know. Everyone is different. Best of luck! Oh, that's wonderful! Warmest congratulations to you and your soon-to-be expanding family. ---------- On a more sober note: My man knows about the abortion. He certainly does not think any less of me for it. I told him of my most notably negative relationship incidents, including when I cheated and was cheated on. We're more similar in our romantic pasts than I have been with all other guys I dated seriously; they were very inexperienced in comparison--virgins or few sexual partners and no relationships lasting a year or more. I realize this doesn't always correlate with insecurity, but in my experience it did--and quite heavily. BF and I are of similar experience levels, so I feel I can talk with him about anything that comes up without him becoming insecure to the point of doing something behind my back (like my ex did). In this relationship I have the distinct sense that I am dealing with a secure man. And I am at the stage in life when I am able to truly appreciate that. I was deeply insecure before, myself--I chose the guys I dated before because I somehow knew I could control them, but I always became bored and that was a clear indicator that control over my partner wasn't what I really needed or wanted. I had to learn that through experience. And yeah, he's really hot...I'm picky too...:laugh: 1
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Well I'm really picky so idk if I would think he is hot but that isn't the point at all. I'm just saying it seems super rushed.. I'm not being mean I'm just saying it was 1 meeting where I'm sure you two hooked up and he's already your bf..? It just seems like too much. All the cutesy things y'all are saying I mean of course it's cute but its like overkill..
Author tigressA Posted November 28, 2012 Author Posted November 28, 2012 Well I'm really picky so idk if I would think he is hot but that isn't the point at all. I'm just saying it seems super rushed.. I'm not being mean I'm just saying it was 1 meeting where I'm sure you two hooked up and he's already your bf..? It just seems like too much. All the cutesy things y'all are saying I mean of course it's cute but its like overkill.. I've said much the same at past points in my life, IB. I was never much of a romantic myself, but turns out I just had to meet someone to bring it out of me. Trust me...when this happens for you, you won't think anything is overkill.
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 I've said much the same at past points in my life, IB. I was never much of a romantic myself, but turns out I just had to meet someone to bring it out of me. Trust me...when this happens for you, you won't think anything is overkill. My ex used to say cute things all the time and you see where he is (not with me lol). I mean I used to be all giddy about that stuff too but it just seems like bs. No offense
mickleb Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 I'm afraid, although the passionate beginning of your relationship could mean that you are each other's lobsters, it could also just be Act One of the Classic Active/Passive Commitment Phobics' Dance. As I said to another poster the other day: never let your rational self out of your sight! Good luck. 1
snowflakes88 Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Imperfection, aren't you the same person always talking about how you picture babies with someone you like right away, and being desperate for someone - anyone - to marry you and knock you up immediately? Or at least to be in a relationship with you??? The same person who can't stand to be alone for more than a few days? If your criticisms were coming from anyone else, I might believe they were coming from a place of concern. From you, I definitely think it is envy/jealousy. If you met a guy tonight who you found attractive and he said he wanted to be in a relationship with you, I think you would LEAP at the opportunity. 2
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 Imperfection, aren't you the same person always talking about how you picture babies with someone you like right away, and being desperate for someone - anyone - to marry you and knock you up immediately? Or at least to be in a relationship with you??? The same person who can't stand to be alone for more than a few days? If your criticisms were coming from anyone else, I might believe they were coming from a place of concern. From you, I definitely think it is envy/jealousy. If you met a guy tonight who you found attractive and he said he wanted to be in a relationship with you, I think you would LEAP at the opportunity. Actually I wouldn't at all. And I don't have to be jealous there are guys who want me, I don't want them like I said I'm picky. I don't think you can fall in love in 10 days that's all I said so get off my back
Divasu Posted November 28, 2012 Posted November 28, 2012 I don't think you can fall in love in 10 days that's all I said so get off my back Actually you can. It's a biological response, dopamine and adrenaline. 1
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