Fan666 Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 Have a girlfriend of three years. Its been rocky, we have broken up 5 times already and I went abroad for a year to get a break. I love her but not in love with her or really attracted to her anymore. She is still in love with me and is planning our future all the time. I admit part of the reason I stay is fear, fear of change and a very comfortable lifestyle we have. Its easy, known and Ive gotten used to pretending. I dont have high self esteem, my GF is kind of cute but not pretty, there is no competition and she wont ever leave me. I know a girl I used to hang out with that ive always been crazy for. She is everything my GF isnt..confident, feminine, calm and very beautiful. The kicker, she told me not long ago shes in love with me but of course she stays away. This other girl is all ive ever dreamed of but it would take a lot of confidence for me to go after her and change my whole life. Do I stay with not great but ok, easy, comfortable or do i push myself to go for what i really want? Im 26 by the way and my GF is now starting to talk marriage so its now or never.
MrCastle Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 Don't string the poor girl along. Tell her how you feel. As a man, that's your job. You can't let her go around thinking everything is great and you guys will be married soon when you have little feelings for her and other feelings for someone else. Break it off with her. 2
iiiii Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 Yup, if the situation is what you describe, you shouldn't be marrying your girlfriend anyway, regardless of whether there's another better girl around. It's not good for you, or her, if you get married when you aren't really into her! 1
todreaminblue Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 You cant pretend forever and it isn't fair to continue pretending, not to her and not you.....you need to be honest and let her be with someone who doesnt have to pretend she has that right to have a real and loving relationship not an act you are playing at....you are going to have to risk an ask on the girl you do like there is no certainty......but even if it doesnt work out for you at least you arent stringing a girl along because you find it comfortable and an easy life.......you have been fair if you come clean......on you and her....good luck.....deb
Eternal Sunshine Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 Were you ever attracted to her? How is your sex life?
iris219 Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 I feel sorry for your GF. Do not marry her! Let her go so she can find someone who loves her and isn't comparing her to another woman. If you aren't into your GF, break up with her. If you don't want to be with her, you shouldn't be with her, regardless of whether you have a hotter, "better" girl waiting. It sounds like you're afraid to be alone. Break up with your GF, be on your own for awhile, and then decide if you want to date the other girl.
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