leigh66 Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 My hubby keeps texting this woman who lives about 200 miles from home, he doesnt travel in his job and he keeps deleted the txts ime not sure is he cheating and how could he be if she lives 200 miles away???
Ladydrib Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 My hubby keeps texting this woman who lives about 200 miles from home, he doesnt travel in his job and he keeps deleted the txts ime not sure is he cheating and how could he be if she lives 200 miles away??? He probably is. And long distance affairs do happen. Don't confront him - he won't admit it. Play dumb and don't let him know you have any suspicions. Let him drop his guard on it, then watch for an opportunity to get his phone. They have software that you can install on a phone and you will be able to see everything he does or says with his phone. You will need to be able to have access to his phone for a few minutes to instal it. I recommend practicing on your phone first so you can be sure of how it works. Also, you can put a key logger on his computer. Also practice with yours first. Most importantly, do NOT let him know you are suspicious. If you already have, just let it go and pretend you are not. You will get confirmation that he either is or is not cheating. If he is you can then confront him with evidence. Before you do, try to decide what it is that you would want to do if he is cheating. Be prepared so you can control the situation. 3
Author leigh66 Posted November 21, 2012 Author Posted November 21, 2012 No he doesnt suspect yet but ime finding it hard to hold in, i keep ringing the girl and putting the phone down, ime really annoyed but i dont know how he would find the time to see her
Ladydrib Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 No he doesnt suspect yet but ime finding it hard to hold in, i keep ringing the girl and putting the phone down, ime really annoyed but i dont know how he would find the time to see her Stop trying to guess and get to the facts. If you want the truth, you must keep quiet about it.
MissBee Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 No he doesnt suspect yet but ime finding it hard to hold in, i keep ringing the girl and putting the phone down, ime really annoyed but i dont know how he would find the time to see her Have you asked him about it? How do you know he's texting, have you been going through his phone, if so why? To me, it doesn't matter if he's cheating or not, it just matters that he is doing something suspicious and hiding things. Why? What acceptable reason can a married man have of continuous texting to another woman and then deleting said texts? None I can think of. 2
Author leigh66 Posted November 21, 2012 Author Posted November 21, 2012 yes i am going to keep quiet but where do i get one of the deleted texts things
Author leigh66 Posted November 21, 2012 Author Posted November 21, 2012 I know because i have access to his mobile phone bill but he doesnt know it, so i cant tell him i know of him texting because then i know he will know how i know, he also gets texts from his so called friend who works with him, texting him jokes because he says he will forget them if he tells him the jokes but i know this is a man because i rang it once
Ladydrib Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 yes i am going to keep quiet but where do i get one of the deleted texts things Find out what kind of phone he has and google phone key loggers. Do research. If he keeps his phone locked you can't instal it. You'll have to trick him into not locking his phone. If he's not locking his phone yet, you better get it quick because I can assure you he will start locking his phone. It will also be hard to get the phone unguarded. Maybe while he's in the shower? Although he may even take it in there... If he does you can make a comment like "that's weird that you take your phone in the shower..." and say not a word more. Even if he says something that makes you want to say more. Just don't say another word. What that will do is make him want to act less suspicious but will not tip him off that you are suspicious. So he will not put his guard up very high or for very long, but he will try to stop acting so suspicious which means it will be easier for you to get ahold of his phone.
Author leigh66 Posted November 21, 2012 Author Posted November 21, 2012 no he doesnt lock his phone, he leaves it downstairs and when hes in the shower and sometimes forgets it when he goes to work, he forgot it last week and even i didnt know he forgot it as it was in his coat pocket but as soon as he got home and found it he txt the woman first
Ladydrib Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 no he doesnt lock his phone, he leaves it downstairs and when hes in the shower and sometimes forgets it when he goes to work, he forgot it last week and even i didnt know he forgot it as it was in his coat pocket but as soon as he got home and found it he txt the woman first Install the key logger asap. Affairs escalate. Sounds like he's in the beginning. It's just a matter of time before he keeps it with him all the time and before he locks it. Has he cheated in the past or had suspicious behavior previously?
Ladydrib Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 If he is cheating and you let on that you're suspicious, he's going to get angry at you for not trusting him and then he's going to lock the phone and tell you it's because you don't respect his privacy and you should trust him. So don't say anything until you can get confirmation one way or the other. If you find out he's not cheating, you'll have to figure out if you have something internal that you need to work on. If he is in fact not doing anything you have to ask yourself why would you have gotten suspicious. The thing is though, if he is cheating, he will NOT admit it without proof. So discussing it serves no purpose. You need to get answers without him knowing.
Author leigh66 Posted November 21, 2012 Author Posted November 21, 2012 yes he has cheated in the past
Ladydrib Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 yes he has cheated in the past Get that key logger.
Author leigh66 Posted November 21, 2012 Author Posted November 21, 2012 i will when i can afford and have looked into which is the best to get, we are supposed to be going on hol in a week and i really dont know how ime going to cope, ime not saying anything though because then he will know
Magica Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 I agree that if he isn't physically cheating yet, he will be. Also, emotional affairs can be with anyone in the world, and they are also cheating. He has cheated in the past and he's acting suspiciously again; I think I'd be more concerned about what you're prepared to do once you confirm that he is cheating again.
Author leigh66 Posted November 22, 2012 Author Posted November 22, 2012 (edited) I am waiting for the excuse he needs to travel to go on a training course for work, i cant understand where he could have met her as she lives 200 miles away. he must have her number stored on his phone or written down because he cant even remember his own telephone number Edited November 22, 2012 by leigh66
Author leigh66 Posted November 22, 2012 Author Posted November 22, 2012 would it be a good idea to send the other woman a txt saying why are you texting my husband and dont deny it, how do you think ive got your number?
Author leigh66 Posted November 22, 2012 Author Posted November 22, 2012 yeh true but you couldnt do that in a car in daylight and he doesnt go out on a night
Ladydrib Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 would it be a good idea to send the other woman a txt saying why are you texting my husband and dont deny it, how do you think ive got your number? No if you want to get the truth. She will tell him that you contacted her. And there is nothing you say to her will keep her away if they are emotionally connecting. I wouldn't dare contact her.
Ladydrib Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 yeh true but you couldnt do that in a car in daylight and he doesnt go out on a night I'm sorry to say, but people do that. Also, there are hotels everywhere.
Author leigh66 Posted November 22, 2012 Author Posted November 22, 2012 yeah but i know her name and what she looks like and she is married and half is age, i typed her number in on my pc and all her details came up and i thought i could say you tell me every thing i need to know or ime telling your husband
whichwayisup Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 My hubby keeps texting this woman who lives about 200 miles from home, he doesnt travel in his job and he keeps deleted the txts ime not sure is he cheating and how could he be if she lives 200 miles away??? Emotional online cheating. That's still something inappropriate he shouldn't be doing since he's your husband! SO yeah, it is cheating. He is deleted their conversations, so whatever it is they are talking about is something he doesn't want you to read. 1
whichwayisup Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 yes he has cheated in the past Then you know what he is capable of. Once you have solid proof, do you plan on ending your marriage or do you want to see if he'll stop cheating and stay married to you? You need to decide what it is you want. Forgiving once after infidelity is understandable, most deserve a second chance.. But a third chance? You could hire a PI. Just because she's 200 miles away doesn't mean they don't see each other.
Author leigh66 Posted November 22, 2012 Author Posted November 22, 2012 well if i had proof i would def end it, but having 2 kids and pets i would have to find somewhere to live first, cant afford a PI ile just sit and take note
Ladydrib Posted November 22, 2012 Posted November 22, 2012 yeah but i know her name and what she looks like and she is married and half is age, i typed her number in on my pc and all her details came up and i thought i could say you tell me every thing i need to know or ime telling your husband Nope, won't work. If she knows you know, she knows her husband is going to find out anyway. I don't believe she will admit a thing. If they are having an affair she will contact your husband immediately so they can get their stories straight and determine how much you know or how you could know. Though one option might be to text her while you are with your husband. See his reaction when she immediately contacts him. Don't think that because she is married or half his age that it wouldn't happen. I unfortunately was in an affair, believed that was something I'd ever be involved in, nor did I believe I could have interest in a man that was more than 20 years older than me!! I'd stay away from contacting her until you get more convincing evidence. If you feel you must contact her, make sure you do it when you are with your husband so you can watch his reaction when she texts him.
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