dreamingoftigers Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 lol larry Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman is a good book actually. Yeah, it's in the personal library.
maybealone Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 I had a male friend who i hung around with a year ago, i knew exactly how kind of a guy he was. All the girls where drooling over him, yet he has just average personality. Since i know for sure he isn't a charmer then this personality has nothing to do with how well he does with women. He is tall, good looking face and dresses like an average guy. Yet, i would get thrown in the trash for this guy even through i dress better and am more confident and much more muscular. My guess would be one of two issues: (1) If he has just an average personality and is not a charmer and you hang out with him, perhaps the same reasons you don't have more interesting friends has something to do with why you aren't having better luck with women, or (2) If you talk down about your friends and think you are better than them, which is what this post sounds like, maybe you inadvertently have this same attitude around women and they sense it, thereby making them decide to not go out with you.
IT Geek Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 The thing is: an ugly person can experience the SAME LEVEL of happiness that a beautiful person does! ..... What's more, ugly people find love with other ugly people. It sounds harsh, but it is true. You just have to LEARN to be positive about what you have, rather than dwell that better looking people have it easier' they do, but you can be as happy as they are.... So in effect are you saying that people should learn to settle? That they should LEARN to be happy with someone? I'd rather be alone for the right reasons than with someone for the wrong reasons.
USMCHokie Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 So in effect are you saying that people should learn to settle? That they should LEARN to be happy with someone? I'd rather be alone for the right reasons than with someone for the wrong reasons. Either "settle" or improve other qualities of your life to compensate for your below average looks.
IT Geek Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 Either "settle" or improve other qualities of your life to compensate for your below average looks. If you settle, you're not being true to yourself. And it's hard to compensate for looks since women make a snap judgement within the first 30 seconds as to whether or not they're physically attracted to you enough to be interested.
Mrlonelyone Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 If you settle, you're not being true to yourself. And it's hard to compensate for looks since women make a snap judgement within the first 30 seconds as to whether or not they're physically attracted to you enough to be interested. The reason we say that is because no one is perfect. Even the most perfect looking person has problems. Everyone has baggage, ex's, emotional scars, physical scars, issues and problems. A relationship, a real relationship is about learning to love someone who isn't perfect and being loved back by them. 1
IT Geek Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 The reason we say that is because no one is perfect. Even the most perfect looking person has problems. Everyone has baggage, ex's, emotional scars, physical scars, issues and problems. A relationship, a real relationship is about learning to love someone who isn't perfect and being loved back by them. Perhaps, but I was referring to GETTING to that point. You can't build a relationship without getting to know someone and dating, and you can't get to that point if there is no physical attraction.
Anna84 Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 Generalising is pretty much senseless. Looks, money, status, those were things my ex had. The guy I'm chasing, and who my ex's got nothing on, is the complete opposite. He's chubby, pale, not considered attractive I would say by most, penniless and has no ambitions. It's a 100 % his personality.
SoulSearcher22 Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 I believe that if women are put in a situation where they must interact with a guy they may not find all that attractive (such as work, school project, ect..), that if the guy has a good personality, makes her laugh and things like that, he can get her to fall in love with him.
Hawakai Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 If you settle, you're not being true to yourself. And it's hard to compensate for looks since women make a snap judgement within the first 30 seconds as to whether or not they're physically attracted to you enough to be interested. I don't see what you're going through in real life. I have several classmate who are more far more attractive than most of the high-powered hollywood starlets. They have a steady-boyfriend/live-in boyfriend but they're always looking to improve. Just today I was sitting right next to a flawless Asian-American girl who's been with her boyfriend for the past 5 years(she's 20) and the girl was asking the below average guys what they wanted to do after college, if they were getting a master's in engineering. Plenty of very attractive women are dating below average guys. I see it all the time. 5 feet tall dudes balding in their early 20's, skinny, dating 6 feet tall hot girls. Geeky white dudes dating hot girls from Seoul.
IT Geek Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 Just today I was sitting right next to a flawless Asian-American girl who's been with her boyfriend for the past 5 years(she's 20) and the girl was asking the below average guys what they wanted to do after college, if they were getting a master's in engineering. Plenty of very attractive women are dating below average guys. I see it all the time. 5 feet tall dudes balding in their early 20's, skinny, dating 6 feet tall hot girls. Geeky white dudes dating hot girls from Seoul. A 5 foot tall skinny dude in his 20s is going to have better luck with women in his age range than a overweight guy in his 40s will have in his. Plus, when you're in college it's like the Nirvana of meeting places. You interact with so many people on a daily basis. When you're in a career it's not near as easy to meet such a diverse set of people. But then again, I am hoping to be accepted as a doctoral candidate at GA Tech.
Recommended Posts