blue_jay_bird Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I still feel like i have no idea what happened. My ex was unhappy, and never told me. "Talk to them about it, find out why you are unhappy, and what can be done to change it. If things can be fixed then fix them, if not figure out how you move apart. You need to figure out if its an obstacle or an end point." This is the only logic I can understand. But HE NEVER DID ANY OF THIS. He just came to me one day and dumped me. It was a endpoint. I need some kind of understanding. I just don't understand what happened.
itsmyfault Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I still feel like i have no idea what happened. My ex was unhappy, and never told me. "Talk to them about it, find out why you are unhappy, and what can be done to change it. If things can be fixed then fix them, if not figure out how you move apart. You need to figure out if its an obstacle or an end point." This is the only logic I can understand. But HE NEVER DID ANY OF THIS. He just came to me one day and dumped me. It was a endpoint. I need some kind of understanding. I just don't understand what happened. You will just set yourself back. As Cpt says, "i dont want to be with you" should be all the reason you need. It doesnt matter why they broke it off, just that they did. you will only cause further hurt
taya Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I still feel like i have no idea what happened. My ex was unhappy, and never told me. "Talk to them about it, find out why you are unhappy, and what can be done to change it. If things can be fixed then fix them, if not figure out how you move apart. You need to figure out if its an obstacle or an end point." This is the only logic I can understand. But HE NEVER DID ANY OF THIS. He just came to me one day and dumped me. It was a endpoint. I need some kind of understanding. I just don't understand what happened. ok i see why you mad other post about this man so amazing putting this man above you so you can feel good to contact him beside the point tho ..but he left nothing you can do about it but prove to him that you can do good by your self ..you know whats going to make you feel worst is if you bake no contact and this man tell you it cant be work out for what ever reason becuase if you bake no contact your forcing him to talk to you so anything he tells you dont get mad becauase his actions is alredy telling you whats up but i guess you need to ear it from his mouth..my advice let him go and let him come to you
Chi townD Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I still feel like i have no idea what happened. My ex was unhappy, and never told me. "Talk to them about it, find out why you are unhappy, and what can be done to change it. If things can be fixed then fix them, if not figure out how you move apart. You need to figure out if its an obstacle or an end point." This is the only logic I can understand. But HE NEVER DID ANY OF THIS. He just came to me one day and dumped me. It was a endpoint. I need some kind of understanding. I just don't understand what happened. Okay, you break NC to ask the hard questions. But, then what? Not to be rude, but he ended things with you. What's breaking NC going to change? It's not going to make him come running back and see the error of his ways. He not going to have an epiphany and discover that he was wrong. Look, it's nothing you did. So, you need to move on. And you need to make positive changes in your life. Get a new hairstyle, buy a new wardrobe. This will help you with your self esteem. Go to the gym and run your ass off on the treadmill and push some weight. Take a spin class. This will help you work off the stress and frustrations as well as giving you a new lean sexy bod that he will not have the pleasure to appreicate. Me up with friends! Travel! make it so that one day he'll think to himself, "You know what? I was an idiot for letting her go." Make those positive changes in your life. And say to yourself, "Guess what? HIS LOSS!!!"
Author blue_jay_bird Posted November 20, 2012 Author Posted November 20, 2012 ok i see why you mad other post about this man so amazing putting this man above you so you can feel good to contact him beside the point tho ......my advice let him go and let him come to you He's not going to come to me. He has a new girlfriend, and will do anything prove to himself that he was right breaking up with me.
veggirl Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 Oh please don't! I understand why you want to do it but if someone dumps you, it's on them to come back if they want to talk or whatever. You may get one convo out of him but then what? You will be waiting to see if that opened any doors, if that will create another opportunity...don't go down the rabbit hole!!!! 1
taya Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 He's not going to come to me. He has a new girlfriend, and will do anything prove to himself that he was right breaking up with me. so if you know all of this why you want to brake nc??? to get rejected again come on hun you even say he have a new girlfriend ...i know it hurts but you got to move on..let him go and find a man that will not leave .
Chi townD Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 He's not going to come to me. He has a new girlfriend, and will do anything prove to himself that he was right breaking up with me. Then, you prove him wrong! Walk with your head held high! MAKE THOSE POSITIVE CHANGES IN YOUR LIFE!!!! I'm a guy, and in my opinion, there is nothing more sexier to me than a strong, independant woman that WANTS to be with a man, rather than NEEDS to be with a man (big difference). A woman that is independant but never loses her femininity. A woman that wants and deserves to be treated like a woman. And if you treat her right, you'll know that she'll stand by your side and treat me like the man that I am. Find that strong independant woman. She's there. You just have to find her. 1
taya Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 Oh please don't! I understand why you want to do it but if someone dumps you, it's on them to come back if they want to talk or whatever. You may get one convo out of him but then what? You will be waiting to see if that opened any doors, if that will create another opportunity...don't go down the rabbit hole!!!! i agree ..giving that man too much power he left her but she is the one that is trying to run him down he should be doing that and hes not what he did is get another gf so that alone should tell ya
Author blue_jay_bird Posted November 20, 2012 Author Posted November 20, 2012 (edited) I guess i want to break nc to understand why he dumped me out of the blue and didn't talk to me about issues of his unhappy, and what can be done to change it. That is what i want to ask him. Why he thought that after seven year's he could not talk to me and work on problems. I'm not expecting for him to say... well your right we should work on these problem. Let's get back together. Edited November 20, 2012 by blue_jay_bird
veggirl Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I guess i want to break nc to understand why he dumped me out of the blue and didn't talk to me about issues of his unhappy, and what can be done to change it. That is what i want to ask him. Why he thought that after seven year's he could not talk to me and work on problems. He probably did it out of the blue because he had his new gf on the back burner and once he actually worked up the courage to dump you, he had to just blurt it out before he got weak again. Regardless of his reason, it won't make you feel better! You think it will but if he says "I wanted to dump you the whole last year!" or "Because my new gf told me to do it now or she would not be with me!" .... you think that'll make you feel BETTER? What would make you feel better? Him regretting it..but he doesn't. Asking him will NOT help you!! It just won't. It will hurt you more and it will create MORE questions that you will want answers to!
taya Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I guess i want to break nc to understand why he dumped me out of the blue and didn't talk to me about issues of his unhappy, and what can be done to change it. That is what i want to ask him. Why he thought that after seven year's he could not talk to me and work on problems. omg you dont want to let go and you dont want to move on is action is speaking louder that his words he dont talk to you le left you he have another gf so what more you want him to say ..you dont want to move on and this is why your in this pain and you will always be if you keep acting like this ..this is the same guy you said in your other post was a god like figure and also say hes better then you omg stop it if he wanted you he would have been with you ..sorry to say this but you wont feel better because you dont want to you put this guy above you and you live in crazy land:o
Chi townD Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 Well, if you want my opinion. He dumped you and jumped right into his next relationship should clue you in on what happened. He didn't stop at go, he didn't collect 200 dollars. He found an interest in someone else. And I speculate at he was cheating on you. It may or may not have been physical. But, you don't have to have sex to cheat. He could have been in an Emotional Affair (EA) and ended things with you before it became physical. That's my guess. But, I will tell you this. And I truely believe this with everything I got. There's a guy out there especially for you. Who will treat you like a Princess. Who won't put you on a pedistal, but will treat you like his equal; his other half and his PARTNER in life. He'll be your rock during the hard times. He'll be the goofball that makes you laugh and does crazy things that have you amazed he survived his teenage years. He'll be the guy that you miss when he's gone and gives you butterflies in your stomach when he's about ready to return. He'll do little things to make you feel special. Like, leaving "I love you" post it notes on the bathroom mirror. He'll be the one sending you flowers at your work with a note on there say, "Just because it's Tuesday." He'll remember when you looked at something through a window and months later you open it up at Christmas and you never even said a word to him about it. He just KNEW you liked it. He'll be your friend and your lover. And he'll be a "nice guy" in the bedroom because "Nice guys FINISH last". You will feel so content and so safe when your spooning on the couch just watching a movie and nothing more than that. He'll be your biggest fan with anything you accomplish in life and he'll be your cheering section when you faulter. This douche rocket you dated it's it. I promise you that this guy is looking for you RIGHT NOW. But, he's never going to find you if you don't move on. Put yourself out there. Why do I believe this sooo much? Because it happened to me. The girl I was in love with and was supposed to marry cheated on me. Obviously, she wasn't it. But, I made positive changes in my life, I got out there. I traveled. I worked on me. And then....one day....I found her, quite by accident. But, she turned into the girl of my dreams and we've been happliy married ever since. Now, I look back to my Ex as compared to what I have today and there's only one thing I always ask myself, " What the hell was I thinking?!?!?!"
suladas Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I guess i want to break nc to understand why he dumped me out of the blue and didn't talk to me about issues of his unhappy, and what can be done to change it. That is what i want to ask him. Why he thought that after seven year's he could not talk to me and work on problems. I'm not expecting for him to say... well your right we should work on these problem. Let's get back together. The easiest way to put it is they dumped you because they felt their life would be better without you in it. So just give them their wish. I wanted answers to, it's normal but you just got to fight the urge it does go away and you'll eventually stop caring and move on. Why would you want someone back who left you for someone else anyway?
Author blue_jay_bird Posted November 20, 2012 Author Posted November 20, 2012 Well, if you want my opinion. He dumped you and jumped right into his next relationship should clue you in on what happened. He didn't stop at go, he didn't collect 200 dollars. He found an interest in someone else. And I speculate at he was cheating on you. It may or may not have been physical. But, you don't have to have sex to cheat. He could have been in an Emotional Affair (EA) and ended things with you before it became physical. That's my guess. But, I will tell you this. And I truely believe this with everything I got. There's a guy out there especially for you. Who will treat you like a Princess. Who won't put you on a pedistal, but will treat you like his equal; his other half and his PARTNER in life. He'll be your rock during the hard times. He'll be the goofball that makes you laugh and does crazy things that have you amazed he survived his teenage years. He'll be the guy that you miss when he's gone and gives you butterflies in your stomach when he's about ready to return. He'll do little things to make you feel special. Like, leaving "I love you" post it notes on the bathroom mirror. He'll be the one sending you flowers at your work with a note on there say, "Just because it's Tuesday." He'll remember when you looked at something through a window and months later you open it up at Christmas and you never even said a word to him about it. He just KNEW you liked it. He'll be your friend and your lover. And he'll be a "nice guy" in the bedroom because "Nice guys FINISH last". You will feel so content and so safe when your spooning on the couch just watching a movie and nothing more than that. He'll be your biggest fan with anything you accomplish in life and he'll be your cheering section when you faulter. This douche rocket you dated it's it. I promise you that this guy is looking for you RIGHT NOW. But, he's never going to find you if you don't move on. Put yourself out there. Why do I believe this sooo much? Because it happened to me. The girl I was in love with and was supposed to marry cheated on me. Obviously, she wasn't it. But, I made positive changes in my life, I got out there. I traveled. I worked on me. And then....one day....I found her, quite by accident. But, she turned into the girl of my dreams and we've been happliy married ever since. Now, I look back to my Ex as compared to what I have today and there's only one thing I always ask myself, " What the hell was I thinking?!?!?!" My ex did EVERYTHING you listed. Supported me, did the lame i love you post-its. But, seemed to shut down the year i entered university and became dependent and emotional. But there's nothing i can do about that i guess, when the going gets tough ... the ******* show their colors. I'm just tired of people leaving me. I guess i have to find someone that will stick with me through high water. What a ****ing pussy.
Chi townD Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 Can I date you please!? LOL!! I guess I'm kind of a hopeless romantic. We're a dying breed; however, there are still quite a few of us out there. Guys just don't understand that it's just the smallest things that make the biggest impact. Although, sometimes boldness can get you into trouble. My wife said the most romantic thing I ever did almost resulted in me losing her. One day, while we were dating, she recieved a dozen roses from me and the card said, "I'm not breaking up with you but I have to let you know that my love for you will end when the last rose out of this dozen dies." Well, she called me up yelling about what the hell does that mean? I can't believe your breaking up with me! You're an ass! I don't want to talk to you right now! I don't even want to see you!!! All the while I'm trying to get her to calm down. No luck, CLICK!!! And she wouldn't return my calls, texts...nothing. I was just praying that she didn't throw them out. Luckly she didn't. After a few days, the roses started to grow weaker and bend. They started to brown......all except one. It remained healthy and bright fire engine red. Then, one day she call ME and she said, "It isn't real." I had the flourist replace one live rose with a fake cloth one. It looked very real. I said, "Yep!" She said she didn't get it. I said, " My love for you ends when the last rose in that dozen dies. Is that rose going to die?" I guess the lightbulb went on because she said "Awwww" then started to cry. THEN, she told me that I had 10 mintues to get over to her place and in her bed. "YES! MA'AM!!"
Chi townD Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 My ex did EVERYTHING you listed. Supported me, did the lame i love you post-its. But, seemed to shut down the year i entered university and became dependent and emotional. But there's nothing i can do about that i guess, when the going gets tough ... the ******* show their colors. I'm just tired of people leaving me. I guess i have to find someone that will stick with me through high water. What a ****ing pussy. Again! Trust me. The guy is going to find you. The RIGHT guy. You'll know it when you feel it. And believe me, he won't feel anything like this guy. It will feel a lot different. I can't explain it, but you'll know when it's right. For now, take care of you!!!
Author blue_jay_bird Posted November 20, 2012 Author Posted November 20, 2012 Again! Trust me. The guy is going to find you. The RIGHT guy. You'll know it when you feel it. And believe me, he won't feel anything like this guy. It will feel a lot different. I can't explain it, but you'll know when it's right. For now, take care of you!!! I have a hard time believing you. There are so many stories about happy couples that get married and end up getting divorced. Because when you falling in love, regardless of weather it is the right guy or not, you will believe he's the one. I believe a ton of people fall in love every day think, iv never felt this way before. He's the one. 7 year's later, oh sorry honey i found someone better. ...sorry honey im just not happy.
Chi townD Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I have a hard time believing you. There are so many stories about happy couples that get married and end up getting divorced. Because when you falling in love, regardless of weather it is the right guy or not, you will believe he's the one. I believe a ton of people fall in love every day think, iv never felt this way before. He's the one. 7 year's later, oh sorry honey i found someone better. ...sorry honey im just not happy. And there are many, MANY stories on happy couples that are celebrating their 20th, 30th, 40th and 50th wedding anniversary. By the way, he didn't find someone better. I speculate that they won't last. Look, you're upset and rightfully so! He did you wrong. And you want to know WHAT YOU did wrong. Why does it have to be anything you did? How about him just being a selfish douche rocket that leaves without an explaination. That should be enough since he's not man enough to tell you the truth. Look, our lives are our own. We choose to SHARE our lives with people. Don't let him get you thinking that you can't function without him. Because you can. Like I said before, you need to find that strong, independant woman inside you. Now, I realize that I'm a man and not your favorite kind of gender right now. But, you have so much to offer. If your feel that maybe you didn;t do some things right in this last relationship. Learn from it. Believe me, the right guy is going to want to send the douche rocket a thank you card. 1
Author blue_jay_bird Posted November 20, 2012 Author Posted November 20, 2012 And there are many, MANY stories on happy couples that are celebrating their 20th, 30th, 40th and 50th wedding anniversary. By the way, he didn't find someone better. I speculate that they won't last. Look, you're upset and rightfully so! He did you wrong. And you want to know WHAT YOU did wrong. Why does it have to be anything you did? How about him just being a selfish douche rocket that leaves without an explaination. That should be enough since he's not man enough to tell you the truth. Look, our lives are our own. We choose to SHARE our lives with people. Don't let him get you thinking that you can't function without him. Because you can. Like I said before, you need to find that strong, independant woman inside you. Now, I realize that I'm a man and not your favorite kind of gender right now. But, you have so much to offer. If your feel that maybe you didn;t do some things right in this last relationship. Learn from it. Believe me, the right guy is going to want to send the douche rocket a thank you card. I love you right now. I don't know why i pay for for someone to tell me all the things you just said.
Recommended Posts