dyzfunctioned Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 Posted about a week ago about my girlfriend of 3 years dumping me. On the weekend we met up to talk and had a fantastic, constructive talk. Probably the best and most honestly we've ever communicated in our entire relationship. I laid absolutely everything on the line - my feelings, my fears, my thoughts... We were both calm, discussed all our issues, and discussed legitimate ways we could overcome then. Afterwards, we had sex, talked like things were normal again and she even said "I feel like I've already made my decision," and smiled. We both thought we should take a few days to think things over and I left with a definite sense of hope. We agreed not to talk over next few days to avoid swaying each other and last night she texted me saying, "goodnight ill talk to you again tomorrow." Then tonight I get a call. I answer it with mixed feelings of joy, hope, and nervousness. These were quickly replaced with shock, pain, and anger as she told me her gut told her breaking up was the right thing to do. I feel broken. Empty. I've spent the past couple days waking up, working, coming home and watching tv until I can't keep my eyes open, then dragging myself to bed and repeating. And I felt bad then. Now I feel like life has no point. I know that's only temporarily but it sure as hell feels like it. And I'm mad - holy am I mad. I'm not typically an angry person and can't even recall the last time I got visibly angry and I was screaming, punching stuff, wanting to drive my car into a light pole. That's it... To add a little bit of humor to this post, I almost feel like I'm living HIMYM (for fans out there). Things were great, then they went downhill, and now they just plain suck. But I know there's a conclusion in the future but the lead up to that is looking to be ****ing painful.
onavap Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I'm going through the same thing, dealing with the fact that it's seriously over.. We were together for a year and we broke up a few days after our one year anniversary, and although its not as long as yours, love is love, and this is the hardest thing i've ever had to go through. I wish I had some good advice to give you, but it's hard when i feel the exact same way as you. How can they just end things after so many shared feelings and wonderful memories together? We should be able to work anything out. I'm still in denial that it's actually over. All I'm saying is that you shouldn't feel alone during this time, and that there are other people going through the same thing as you. That's why I joined this forum, so i can relate to people, and it's making the process a tad bit easier.
Author dyzfunctioned Posted November 20, 2012 Author Posted November 20, 2012 I'm going through the same thing, dealing with the fact that it's seriously over.. We were together for a year and we broke up a few days after our one year anniversary, and although its not as long as yours, love is love, and this is the hardest thing i've ever had to go through. I wish I had some good advice to give you, but it's hard when i feel the exact same way as you. How can they just end things after so many shared feelings and wonderful memories together? We should be able to work anything out. I'm still in denial that it's actually over. All I'm saying is that you shouldn't feel alone during this time, and that there are other people going through the same thing as you. That's why I joined this forum, so i can relate to people, and it's making the process a tad bit easier. Thanks for the kind words and sorry for your pain. I know what you mean about we should be able to work things out. Wed work things out in the past and I really put myself out there. I owned up to every issue I've ever had, every problem I caused, and I laid out ways I could fix it. This is far beyond anything I've ever done to fix our issues and she really can't give it another chance? It's devastating.
onavap Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I know what you mean about we should be able to work things out. Wed work things out in the past and I really put myself out there. I owned up to every issue I've ever had, every problem I caused, and I laid out ways I could fix it. This is far beyond anything I've ever done to fix our issues and she really can't give it another chance? It's devastating. Exactly. It's heartbreaking thinking that the person you love has given up on you. We just gotta keep telling ourselves that life has a set plan for us, and it's going exactly how it should be so we should just go with the flow. Maybe this is an opportunity for us to be productive with something else and do something to greater ourselves? I don't know, but I miss us like crazy. & I know "everything happens for a reason", but right NOW sucks and I wish I could already meet someone from the future I'll fall in love with, but most of all I still have the slightest bit of hope we'll get back together :/
Author dyzfunctioned Posted November 20, 2012 Author Posted November 20, 2012 Exactly. It's heartbreaking thinking that the person you love has given up on you. We just gotta keep telling ourselves that life has a set plan for us, and it's going exactly how it should be so we should just go with the flow. Maybe this is an opportunity for us to be productive with something else and do something to greater ourselves? I don't know, but I miss us like crazy. & I know "everything happens for a reason", but right NOW sucks and I wish I could already meet someone from the future I'll fall in love with, but most of all I still have the slightest bit of hope we'll get back together :/ I know what you mean... If you ever want to talk, feel free to pm me. God knows nothing can make this hurt go away but at least we can come to terms with it.
onavap Posted November 20, 2012 Posted November 20, 2012 I know what you mean... If you ever want to talk, feel free to pm me. God knows nothing can make this hurt go away but at least we can come to terms with it. Thank you I really appreciate it, same goes to you!
Author dyzfunctioned Posted November 21, 2012 Author Posted November 21, 2012 Well managed to go NC for all of 12 hours before texting her. Then I got this: I want to be with you too but I have to be honest with myself and do what I think is best for me and the right decision. I am feeling incredibly guilty over hurting you. I don't know how To deal with it. I'm so sorry but I can't talk about this again or I'm not gonna be able to make it through the week. I can't sleep at all I keep waking up having panic attacks and I'm so sad. I'm so sorry that I'm hurting you. And it was followed by saying we should stop texting. So looks like this really is over and I'm going NC (I was hoping this would be my decision but apparently not). Pretty much rock bottom right now.
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