Kya mc Posted November 19, 2012 Posted November 19, 2012 Here is my story...I was in a relationship with my ex for more than three years...infact next month was supposed to be our anniversery. But we are no longer together anymore. 3 weeks back she told me she wants to take a break from..now by break I thought take a break from things and think about things so I let her do that and didn't think much about it...we couldn't meet up for the next two weeks as she was busy with her projects and all..I used to get texts from here but not as frequently as I used to and we must have talked to each other on the phone but not a whole lot like we used to....then one day we were talking and she started crying on the phone and I tried to calm her down saying "it will be fine. It's not like we are broken up or anything" and to my surprise she said "I thought we were as that is what I mean when I said we should take a break". After hearing that I was in a shock...we decided to meet up the very next day...I reached her place and we talked and she just told me the things she was feeling....and obviously she thinks she doesn't want to get back. Now the main causes of break up: First: ever since we started dating me she felt I was not as social and our personalities were completely different. when we used to sit down and talk about it i used to tell her that i when i go to her home town i dont know a whole lot of people and it takes a while to warm up to people. Also the yin and yang thing where opposites attract. she was fine with that but this issue used to keep coming up every so often. i wanted to change myself not just because of her but also i also wanted to change for myself. So I started putting myself out there: talking to people as much as i could(i am not the best at making small conversations) and dancing with her at weddings and all. When she started seeing that she used to feel things could work out and there were times she used to get so happy that she used to ask me so when are we marrying...and I used to tell her when the time is right. Believe me i have changed so much from the time when i started dating and now that I am really thankful to her that she provided me the resources and all and I am feel good about myself. But obviously there used to be times when she used to feel the same thing again that I didn't talk to a whole lot of people and drink a whole lot and so the issue would pop up again. Also in this whole thing she feels she doesn't was to change me. And jam trying to tell her I want to change for my own good as it will help me in the long run. Second: Also so thinks she doesn't get the same energy level from what she gets from her friends when she goes to party with them. I used to explain to her that its never going to be the same as she meets her friends only every so often and that's you meet me and talk to me every weekend so that is why things are different. She says she likes the calm energy she gets from me while she is getting wild but she also wants me to get wild every so often. So these are the reasons she broke up with me. Otherwise she always thought I would always love her, keep her happy, be a good father, blah blah blah..obviously things are over between us but I just want to know how wrong/right was I when I used to tell her things would be fine.
I'm nuts Posted November 19, 2012 Posted November 19, 2012 At my age I have come to the conclusion to not change for any body, you have to except how you are; I'm not that sociable either, I'm not the life and soul of the party, if people don't take me for how my character is then tough, obviously you don't want to be a hermit, but if you are reserved in nature you most likely will always be reserved in nature, nothing wrong in that, don't force yourself to fit in to someone else ideal person. People have to accept you for how you are, not everyone likes a big gob, bragger that wont shut up Wild extrovert people I used to find funny for 5 minutes, then I'd wished they'd go home
Author Kya mc Posted November 19, 2012 Author Posted November 19, 2012 At my age I have come to the conclusion to not change for any body, you have to except how you are; I'm not that sociable either, I'm not the life and soul of the party, if people don't take me for how my character is then tough, obviously you don't want to be a hermit, but if you are reserved in nature you most likely will always be reserved in nature, nothing wrong in that, don't force yourself to fit in to someone else ideal person. People have to accept you for how you are, not everyone likes a big gob, bragger that wont shut up Wild extrovert people I used to find funny for 5 minutes, then I'd wished they'd go home Thanks for replying back bud. I know people have to accept me who I am and I used to feel the same way that if they don't like you, you move on and they will too. But now I feel I used to say this to myself as I didn't want to put myself out there because I was afraid about what people are going to think. It was just an excuse for me to so that I could chicken out and wouldn't feel bad about myself. In my high school too I had so many friends...its was like the whole school knew me. I was popular. I changed countries and after coming to US it was really tough to talk to people as my English was not good. I fixed that. I worked really hard on that. It gave me confidence and now I have more friends than what I used to and I like that. I want to continue to work because that is what I want. I myself don't want to just sit at a cafe and have a cup of tea. I like going out with my friends have a good fun time but since I am so adaptable and I have been moving from one place to another where I didn't know a whole lot of people I just got used to the idea of being alone. But I never wanted to do that in the first place. It was just something that was forced on me and with that I grew more and more shy but I never wanted things this way and now because of this I feel I have lost something really special. I know this will be fine. Time is a great healer and its just right now I am in pain but I feel things could have been really good.
Recommended Posts