We are seeing each other?

[Turkishdelight573]

I have been seeing this guy for about a month now and things are going great. He text me everyday and makes time in the week to come and see me and makes sure he will see me one day on the weekend. When we are out he will hold my hand and seem like he is always trying to find some activities so we can have fun. Recently he bought me back to his house and introduce me to his sister and mom which seem to know a lot about me already and were very friendly towards me. In front of his mom and sister, he will be sitting with his arms around me, touching my hand and just basically act like boyfriend and girlfriend even though he has never asked me out.

 

before i went home, he came over and said "if you want you are more than welcome to stay over. If you don't want to its no pressure. ill send you off on the train anyways." and i was really confused (we never do anything besides kissing and hugging.)but i told him i should get home and he sent me off.

 

While walking home i asked him if his mother would really be ok with me sleeping over? he said "why wouldn't she be? my mom and dad are really chill". so i asked (really really awkwardly) what are we? where do we stand?

 

He said "we are seeing each other of course" and i was like..."does that mean we are a couple?"

he said " i don't know, i mean i never asked any of my ex girlfriend out, these things just comes naturally doesn't it?"

 

so i dropped the conversation....but i don't really get it. What the hell does that mean? and is it possible that me and him probably wouldn't become something exclusive?? i know there are types of men who would act like they are in to someone but would be really scared of actually committing. Does showing affection in front of his family means anything at all??

 

sorry i might seem like a high school girl but i havnt had that many boyfriends and all of them asked me out so i always know where i stand while with him i don't.....opinions please?

 

thank you

[LonelyInsomniac]

It sounds like he's receptive to exclusivity. His family knows about you. He's implying you're in a similar role of previous girlfriends.

 

What may or may not be different between you and those girls is you want clarification, which is perfectly rational to want. Especially when you want to see him exclusively.

 

This guy sounds like he's either a romantic idealist, or someone who likes to keep things vague for his own benefit. If some gal gave me that coy response when I was looking for something more? I'd cut to the chase right then and there ("We spend a lot of time together. Are we exclusive, or still keeping our options open?").

 

It's a lot harder to downgrade once things are moving too fast than it is to take things slow.

[xpaperxcutx]

Don't allow others to set boundaries for you when you can set them yourself. If you want a relationship you should make it perfectly clear to him, exclusivity means exclusivity with a title, not some vague answer that will cause more confusions down the road.

 

He sounds like he's receptive to a relationship especially since his parents approve of you. If you want a relationship, tell him yes. If he backtracks and say he doesn't want a title, you owe yourself the favor of walking away from someone who does not really know what he wants.