everclay11 Posted November 17, 2012 Posted November 17, 2012 I started going out with a guy who told me he prefers to date exclusively and see where it goes. We've been dating for 6 weeks now, and because both of us want to take things slow and steady, we've only just recently became intimate. There is definitely chemistry, both mentally and physically. He floats ideas of possible things we can do together in upcoming months. And all is going well. Recently he introduced me to a new acquaintance as his "friend". It felt odd to hear that considering we're not dating anyone else and we're sleeping with each other. This is not the type of guy who plays the field, so it's not about keeping his options open. So here's the question: At what stage is it reasonable to be expected to be called a girlfriend when introduced to others? Does dating exclusively and sleeping with each other not imply you're more than "friends"? Are labels overrated? Should I feel at odds with being categorized as just a "friend" at this point? A couple of other facts to give context...We're both middle-aged, and he's had a couple of solid long-term relationships before. THX!
veggirl Posted November 17, 2012 Posted November 17, 2012 Well, you're not his girlfriend. What did you want to be introduced as? Not sure why he couldn't just say "this is Mary" though. I would never expect a guy to refer to me as his gf unless he first asked me to BE his gf. I suppose this is something you should ask him...6 wks seems like a good time to become "official".
dasein Posted November 17, 2012 Posted November 17, 2012 I totally understand him saying "friend," and am the exact same way depending on the audience. There are people I want privy to my personal life, and those whom I do not. Very few of the former, many of the latter. Maybe he feels the same. Also have heard many older people using "friend" instead of "GF/BF" because in those generations, GF could be taken to mean "courtship in contemplation of engagement and marriage" and you two aren't quite there yet.
FitChick Posted November 17, 2012 Posted November 17, 2012 I don't like labels. I'd expect to introduce or be introduced by just the name. "This is Jane/Frank." If you have to introduce someone it means they are not a part of your intimate circle so don't really need any details. The only exception would be that I would like my boyfriend to introduce me as his "girlfriend" to his EX girlfriends or any other attractive women.
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