AARrock Posted November 16, 2012 Posted November 16, 2012 It had been such a long time since my last girlfriend so when i found this one i was so happy this is her first bf for quite a while too. ive been seeing this girl since august, and after the 2nd and 3rd date we both said we would delete out dating profiles, i guess i was a bit insecure and i checked by creating a fake profile and saw she was still using it i spoke to my friends about it and they said dont say anything and give her the benifit of the doubt and that she could be keeping it as a safety net for the time being . anyway we became bf and gf in late September and we had a couple of weeks when i went on holiday last month and she sent me messages about how she missed me and that she glad im back and since ive been back been seeing more of her and things seem to be going great when were together shes been talking about future plans and doing things with me which is a positive but after all this i cant shake the fact that she is still logging on to the dating site every now and then the last time as little as 4 days ago i just dot know how to handle it as when were together we get on so well but if i confront her about it i don't know what will happen, i was getting so depressed being single cause nothings gone right for me this year i just don't know what to do, i honestly think she doesn't have time to date anyone else as she works long hours and shes still at uni ,shes spent quite a bit on me were official on facebook met her friends and family and they all like me advice is needed please?
DC4 Posted November 16, 2012 Posted November 16, 2012 The guy I am seeing visits POF fairly regularly. If you think you can do better than me, knock yourself out. We've been dating since late August, but I think we're in a different place than you two are. You have two choices- cut ties with her if you don't trust her or let her know you found it and see if she's indeed still looking. If she's still looking, you accept it or you don't. The whole thing is pretty black and white.
Eternal Sunshine Posted November 16, 2012 Posted November 16, 2012 People that OLD are addicted to it. I had my OKC profile for my entire 1 year relationship. I logged in fairly regularly out of habit and to do some quizzes and kill time. I didn't respond or meet up with anyone. The guy I was with didn't have an online profile (we met through fiends) - so he had no idea that I was doing this.
DC4 Posted November 16, 2012 Posted November 16, 2012 People that OLD are addicted to it. I never thought of that. Good point.
NiceGuyDTW Posted November 16, 2012 Posted November 16, 2012 I'm in the same boat. The person I am seeing is on match regularly. I check once in a while. It does bother me, but at the same time as was said...if she does find someone better...then so be it. Meanwhile, I will be doing the same...it's only fair.
mysteryscape Posted November 16, 2012 Posted November 16, 2012 OP, if it's bothering you, ask her about it in a forthright but non-accusatory way. 1
veggirl Posted November 16, 2012 Posted November 16, 2012 Tell her one of your friends who is on that site saw her on it and ask her why she said she would delete her profile but then didn't. I mean what else can you do? You need to ask her. I'd be totally pissed btw.
sweetkiwi Posted November 17, 2012 Posted November 17, 2012 i did not like OLD so as soon as i was dating someone i gladly deleted themm. i would be upset if my SO kept their profile. all you can do is ask her about it. ke èp calm and dont accuse.
dasein Posted November 17, 2012 Posted November 17, 2012 Speaking from personal experience, this is a bad sign. I stuck it out and made an ultimatum last time this came up. She made another profile and stayed on the site. Began cheating while declaring love daily and pressuring me to shop for engagement rings. Not saying this is what yours is doing, but it's a very bad sign. Would break up and move on. People who are truly happy with their SO, respect them and the relationship, don't cruise dating sites.
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