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Posted

Thanks so much for reading this. I really need some opinions!

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 8 months now. I'm so happy with him and I love him very much. He is a very protective person though. So Estes my dilemma:

This guy (we will call him John) just broke up with his girlfriend of over a year. Me and John have always just been friends. My boyfriend (we will call him Kevin) and John are really good friends. They were in football together they hunt together too. I can tell John is looking for a way out of the pain of his breakup.

Today, John flirted with me today. I was pissed, because he knows I have a boyfriend. I told my boyfriend about it and he asked "well did you tell him to stop?" and I said yes. When in reality, I didn't.

But later that day John flirted again. I turned around and said "stop I have a boyfriend!"

Do I tell my boyfriend I lied to him a first or do I leave it?

Posted

You don't tell him.

 

 

Instead you measure whether the guy ("John", is it?) got the message on your (first and only try so far).

 

 

IF he got the message, there is no lingering problem.

 

 

If not, you tell him again... clearly, directly.

Posted

Welcome to the forum. Nah, you are fine, and have character to even consider telling him that. I don't think that you really lied. Just keep rebuffing John and if he persists, he is no friend of your BF's and your BF should be told about it. On the off chance this is some kind of test BF is running on you with John, your BF is not that good a catch.

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Posted
You don't tell him.

 

 

Instead you measure whether the guy ("John", is it?) got the message on your (first and only try so far).

 

 

IF he got the message, there is no lingering problem.

 

 

If not, you tell him again... clearly, directly.

 

Okay thank you so much that really makes me feel better:)

  • Author
Posted
Welcome to the forum. Nah, you are fine, and have character to even consider telling him that. I don't think that you really lied. Just keep rebuffing John and if he persists, he is no friend of your BF's and your BF should be told about it. On the off chance this is some kind of test BF is running on you with John, your BF is not that good a catch.

 

Oh thanks very much:) and awesome advice if it keeps happening I'll definitly question if it's some kind of test. Makes me feel tons better!

Posted

Leave it. The second time around you took the appropriate action. John got the hint the second time around.

Posted

Looks like you've done your part as a girlfriend so I don't see why you would need to tell him. I'm always for honesty and all but as someone who is very protective (call it a character flaw) it wouldn't really matter to me.

Posted
Thanks so much for reading this. I really need some opinions!

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 8 months now. I'm so happy with him and I love him very much. He is a very protective person though. So Estes my dilemma:

This guy (we will call him John) just broke up with his girlfriend of over a year. Me and John have always just been friends. My boyfriend (we will call him Kevin) and John are really good friends. They were in football together they hunt together too. I can tell John is looking for a way out of the pain of his breakup.

Today, John flirted with me today. I was pissed, because he knows I have a boyfriend. I told my boyfriend about it and he asked "well did you tell him to stop?" and I said yes. When in reality, I didn't.

But later that day John flirted again. I turned around and said "stop I have a boyfriend!"

Do I tell my boyfriend I lied to him a first or do I leave it?

 

You leave this, but next time John does this you don't leave yourself available at all. Tell him off!

Posted

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Posted
<snip>

Today, John flirted with me today. I was pissed, because he knows I have a boyfriend. I told my boyfriend about it and he asked "well did you tell him to stop?" and I said yes. When in reality, I didn't.<snip>

I think a better question to ask is, why did your boyfriend ask you that? Does he blame *you* if some guy hits on you? I would probably tell him what happened; that John surprised you by hitting on you and you were too started to tell him to stop the first time, but you told him to stop the second time. You haven't mentioned it, but did your boyfriend sympathize with you for being hit on by someone you consider a friend?
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