blue_jay_bird Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 There's this cute guy i know. Why i would not date him: Pot head, wasting his rich parents money. Doing nothing with his life. But i want to start a fling with him. Bad idea / Good idea?
mesmerized Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 If you can have your emotions in control and you are really really attracted to him, go for it. 1
DC4 Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 If he is on the same page, why not?? Caveat: it's not uncommon at all for this situation to escalate if you're not careful. Either someone is going to get hurt or before you know it, this guy is your boyfriend.
plainjane79 Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT touch a FWB situation with a ten foot pole unless you can't see yourself dating this person seriously, ever. The only guys I've had "successful" FWB situations with were guys who were pretty much the opposite of everything I wanted in a LTR (even looks-wise) and who didn't seem all that interested in me either (judging by their actions.) The ones I was slightly attracted to? Totally fell for them. Bad news. Never again. 1
Drseussgrrl Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 I'm with Plain Jane. FWB situations ultimately end up leaving one or both parties hurt or empty.
plainjane79 Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 I bet that's the guy who is left "empty", after such situation. In my experience, it was usually me left feeling empty. And I'm a chick. EDIT: Oh wait! You were being clever! Bahahaha. My bad.
veggirl Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 You don't strike me as the type who could handle that. That is not a criticism. You're not over your ex, are you SURE there's not a chance you will get attached to this guy? I wouldn't do it.
Author blue_jay_bird Posted November 16, 2012 Author Posted November 16, 2012 He came to me with the proposal of fwb. I said no right away, knowing its a bad idea. FetishMan, just because i don't want to date a someone, with aspects that I don't find attractive, doesn't mean im a shallow person. I would be shallow if I dated him as a project to change him into the type of person i want. And yes he can do SO much better, with his money and the love for pot. He can find a cool, down to earth girl, who will respect him and smoke pot with as well. Hence, why i don't want to be fwb. And why do you think it's me using him. For all you know he could post; "I want to be fwb with this up tight chick that is a isn't into dropping M with me." We both are coming from a LT break up. I'm not going to do it. Cause i think we will both get attached. And the question of who will get hurt, seem's like him since i sound like a selfish bitch, as FetishMan nicely pointed out.
grkBoy Posted November 16, 2012 Posted November 16, 2012 If you can have your emotions in control and you are really really attracted to him, go for it. Agreed. Also make sure he can also keep things as "just sex" and doesn't end up becoming Mr Jealous if you happen to meet some "boyfriend-material" man. I'd also advise you that if you're still seeking a boyfriend in the meantime, to not get so comfortable banging the pothead that you raise the bar to impossible heights for guys to be a boyfriend to you...because you feel you got your "backup plan" in place when you need male attention.
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