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The rules of gift giving


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Posted

With the holidays upon us in the USA and UK the question arises what gifts should one get for someone who one has just started seeing?

 

Let us assume that romantic interest has been stated and reciprocated implicitly at the very least.

 

This is one of those things which could backfire horribly. How are the rest of you going to deal with this? Any thoughts?

Posted

my bf and i had our first date last year in october, so it was very new by the time christmas came around. i got him a coffee mug with his initial on it and he got me .. nothing... until he saw i got him something and then he felt obligated to reciprocate with flowers and chocolates. keep it very very simple imo. no expensive gifts, no clothing/perfume/jewelry, accessories, etc. something very small, like a nice card with movie tickets inside.

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Posted
Dating by a set of rules must be stressful and very limiting.

 

Rules about when to text, call, kiss, sex, when to say ILY, how many days before calling, when to fart, etc, etc.

 

Wow, I am exhausted!:laugh:

 

 

Well that's the world we live in. Ever heard "too much, too soon."?

 

I am thinking of giving someone I have known, for about two and a half months Not counting knowing eachother in passing for almost a year) a gift worth $30.

Posted
Well that's the world we live in. Ever heard "too much, too soon."?

 

I am thinking of giving someone I have known, for about two and a half months Not counting knowing eachother in passing for almost a year) a gift worth $30.

 

 

I think this is totally appropriate.

 

Under the conditions you describe I wouldn't consider your thoughtful gesture "too much, too soon".

 

Now, something very expensive? Yeah, I'd probably look at that as a red flag and be scared off.

Posted

Inexpensive and thoughtful.

 

$30 seems fine. Handmade would be even better.

Posted

IMO, such gifts should be personal and modest. Generally what I do is observe when we're out shopping and see what the lady likes and then pick something which reflects my feelings and buy it independently. I've also made gifts for ladies in my shop; items which reflect both the feelings and my skills working with materials.

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Posted

$30 sounds good. No idea on specifics without more detail.

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Posted
$30 sounds good. No idea on specifics without more detail.

I don't think the specifics matter too much. So long as it isn't an inexpensive wedding ring (they do exist at that price point) I am sure it will be well recieved.

 

Especially since I asked them for something and they said they would get it for me without hesitation.

Posted

It IS the specifics that matter, always. The price range should be modest of course, but something thoughtful is really great if you can be creative.

Anything soft works for me, like alpaca mittens .

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Posted

I'm sort of lucky in this sense because my birthday is on December 21. I can use my birthday to test the waters on whether she believes we're at a gift giving stage or not.

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