Standing_Firm Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 Have not been here in a while...........going through divorce and have been propositioned by someone I have known for quite a while. What do I do?? Thoughts??
Balzac Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 Guage it by your current emotional state. What's to lose? You may see this as the bridge to your new life. 1
aMguilts Posted November 14, 2012 Posted November 14, 2012 Hi Standing_Firm , I`d say wait till your divorce is over , and then wait a few more years after that , before moving on, what`s the rush?? You really want to jump into something so quick? Why not have some time to find yourself first? aM
worldgonewrong Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 Just speaking from my experience only: I've been separated for almost 2 years. The divorce is in its final throes. I've met a new woman I regard as The One, and I've no intention of losing her. I spent 2 years mourning/grieving/weeping, so I know I'm done and ready to move on. The BIG disclaimer here is that I made sure I was damn happy in my own skin before meeting her. You have to be, too, otherwise you're no good to anybody else. Yes, Life is too short - but make sure you're in serviceable shape before inflicting yourself on someone else. That's the long & short of it. (I did a rebound thing in-between, and it was...eghhh. In hindsight, I wish I hadn't. Just make sure you're not setting yourself up for THAT.)
aMguilts Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 Yes, Life is too short - but make sure you're in serviceable shape before inflicting yourself on someone else. That's the long & short of it. ) hello worldgonewrong. aM
Mr. Lucky Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 going through divorce and have been propositioned by someone I have known for quite a while Propositioned to do what exactly ??? JZ 1
aMguilts Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 An earlier poster told you to wait. Well, what if you wait and something amazing passes you by? Well, that can be yet another thing you can regret for the rest of your life. . hi Barnacle-Bob. Yeah that was probably me. I have that attitude from my nan, who used to say, `life is what you make it, and not what it makes you`. She had a point:) Ever heard of `parallel universes`? You know what i mean. In another `parallel universe` , I`m married to megan fox!. What`s stopping me being married to her in THIS frame of time? Me. What`m I`m getting at? Sometimes you can stop and hold on to the `something amazing`, just because it`s there at the time. What if you didn`t stop and wait and carried on and found something MORE amazing? I`m rambling sorry:) aM
PoopHappens Posted November 15, 2012 Posted November 15, 2012 What I can't reconcile is why life is short and can only be meaningful if we have an SO at our side. Most of us go into relationships thinking "they're the one", and then find ourselves on this forum. When I met my wife, I was in relationship that was flagging because she cheated. I wasn't married to this woman and hadn't been seeing her for that long. Even then, in my youth, I knew the right thing to do was to NOT see the first GF if I was going to see the second woman. I made a choice and told woman 1 I wasn't going to see her anymore. Well it took 25 years but the second woman cheated on me as well. Your situation is different I know but I don't believe in "missed opportunities" much, especially given the number of people in the world. You can't possibly know what you missed if you missed it. Only in your mind will you have doubts and that is all it is; in your mind. I was absolutely convinced my wife never ever do the things she has done. And I am starting to think that even though I had many good years with her I wish I had let the day I asked her out pass. That instead of going to where she worked and seeing if she wanted dinner, that I just walked out the door, alone.
aMguilts Posted November 16, 2012 Posted November 16, 2012 hey barnacle. Ok you have made your mind up. Good luck. sincerely aM
lovelymoon Posted November 21, 2012 Posted November 21, 2012 Hey, you must be in a tough situation right now so I'd say be practical - don't just follow your heart, also.. get to know what it will cost like if you guys decided to get a divorce. You see, it can be very costly.. shocking, right? This is not a legal counsel but when you do hit that road, I hope you consider getting mediation instead. Someone wrote about resolving disputes online to seek mediation from professionals.. and the crowd. Depends on your situation really, eQuibbly looks like a better option from this list: Crowdsourced Online Dispute Resolution — Slaw But hope you can get things sorted out, really. The whole experience can be quite traumatic..
Recommended Posts