Moaning about your looks in dating....

[ThaWholigan]

Guys all talk about how being physically attractive is the holy grail and girls won't date any guy who isn't an 8 or some sh*t like that. Or over 6 foot.

 

It gets jarring. Get over it.

 

I actually read some stuff on this site. It's an anti-PUA site, which I don't mind because it actually talks about an alternative viewpoint that makes more sense than some of the other stuff that's anti-game.

 

HER TYPE | Seduction Myth

 

I want guys to read this article because it's at least a small shred of evidence that just maybe it doesn't really matter what you look like (or maybe it does ), you just have to stop being a pussy and get on with it.

 

So, how do you plan on rectifying your looks? Are you going to bitch about it or figure out how to get on with it?

[mammasita]

I've been crazy sexually attracted to many men who were not an 8 or above physically. For me it was their confidence and sense of humor that carried them into "make my panties moist" territory.

[ThaWholigan]

I've been crazy sexually attracted to many men who were not an 8 or above physically. For me it was their confidence and sense of humor that carried them into "make my panties moist" territory.

I think that guys get blinded by when they see good looking guys get girls. I've never let it bother me, nor has it made me think that I will never get girls or will only struggle. So far, as I've been made aware both by my own observations and by other people (comments like "girls like you, you're just such a tard that you never clock :laugh:" from my brother).

 

It's not as simple as that when it comes to women - they do like good looking guys, but they don't all think the same guys are good looking - in my opinion.

[pteromom]

It's much easier to blame society or other people for lack of success than it is to look at why they aren't succeeding and work on themselves.

 

If someone is a 5, he's absolutely gonna have a smaller pool of potential matches than a guy who is a 9. But to extrapolate that to mean he has NO matches is very self-defeating black and white thinking.

 

It just means you gotta work a little harder than the guy who is a 9. That's all it means. And you can sit around whining that it isn't fair that you have to work harder, or you can get to work.

[mammasita]

they do like good looking guys, but they don't all think the same guys are good looking - in my opinion.

Touche....

[PJKino]

I've been crazy sexually attracted to many men who were not an 8 or above physically. For me it was their confidence and sense of humor that carried them into "make my panties moist" territory.

 

But what are you yourself? Not every women can get a guy whos a 9 people learn toget their panties or underwearm moistend by people on their own attractviness level

[pteromom]

It's not as simple as that when it comes to women - they do like good looking guys, but they don't all think the same guys are good looking - in my opinion.

 

This is very true. That guy from Magic Mike was just voted the Sexiest Man, and I think he's ugly. Channing-something-or-other? I find him very unattractive.

 

Give me Andy Garcia any day.

[pteromom]

But what are you yourself? Not every women can get a guy whos a 9 people learn toget their panties or underwearm moistend by people on their own attractviness level

 

This is so not true. So the guys who are 3s watch porn featuring actresses who are 3s? They no longer find a tight butt and big boobs sexy, but instead become attracted to women with a butt as pasty-white and flabby as their own?

 

And women who are 2s have pictures of Danny Devito as their wallpaper?

 

Nope - people are attracted to what they are attracted to. Being able to actually GET a 9 when you are a 2 is another matter, but it depends on what else you have to offer.

[PJKino]

This is so not true. So the guys who are 3s watch porn featuring actresses who are 3s? They no longer find a tight butt and big boobs sexy, but instead become attracted to women with a butt as pasty-white and flabby as their own?

 

And women who are 2s have pictures of Danny Devito as their wallpaper?

 

Nope - people are attracted to what they are attracted to. Being able to actually GET a 9 when you are a 2 is another matter, but it depends on what else you have to offer.

 

My point is people get the best of what they can get and learn to become somehow attracted to it not that these women lust over the average guys but they somehow have to try to find something attratcive about them if its what they can get

 

I also beleive a lot of these ugly couples realize their partner isnt attractive and they arent overwhelmingly attracted to them but its all they can get and they wanted kids and a family

[threebyfate]

One observation about the celebrity couples they depicted. Might be more about narcissism within these specific couples, than similar feature correlation as a generalized element of attraction.

[ThaWholigan]

My point is people get the best of what they can get and learn to become somehow attracted to it not that these women lust over the average guys but they somehow have to try to find something attratcive about them if its what they can get

 

I also beleive a lot of these ugly couples realize their partner isnt attractive and they arent overwhelmingly attracted to them but its all they can get and they wanted kids and a family

Maybe - but I don't know if you read the article or not, but if one has a type, then no matter how objectively attractive they aren't, they will still be attracted to them.

[pteromom]

I also beleive a lot of these ugly couples realize their partner isnt attractive and they arent overwhelmingly attracted to them but its all they can get and they wanted kids and a family

 

I am sure it happens, but I don't see it in my circles. My marriage has its issues but I do find my husband attractive. And he isn't someone who would turn the heads of women. But he's got a great smile and a boyish charm, and I have never thought he was unattractive.

[ThaWholigan]

One observation about the celebrity couples they depicted. Might be more about narcissism within these specific couples, than similar feature correlation as a generalized element of attraction.

 

Possibly . That hasn't been considered, but I'd imagine if that's a conscious decision that's creepy .

 

What do you think of the site? It's very anti-PUA amongst other things, but I actually like it despite that because it offers something more substantial as a criticism of the creation of seduction amongst other things.

[PJKino]

Theres a TON of people that fall into that category. More than most people realize.

 

I agree, seeing alot of my married friends that have wives who hit on good looking men in my social circle and come close to crossing the line im convinced most women are attracted to the same small group of men they just cant get them

 

So they just settle for emotional intimacy and the fact that women who arent married and have kids by a certian age are looked down upon,but in no way are they magically so turned on by their average partner becasue of "love" they still lust over the top men they could never get

[Hawakai]

Guys all talk about how being physically attractive is the holy grail and girls won't date any guy who isn't an 8 or some sh*t like that. Or over 6 foot.

 

It gets jarring. Get over it.

 

I actually read some stuff on this site. It's an anti-PUA site, which I don't mind because it actually talks about an alternative viewpoint that makes more sense than some of the other stuff that's anti-game.

 

HER TYPE | Seduction Myth

 

I want guys to read this article because it's at least a small shred of evidence that just maybe it doesn't really matter what you look like (or maybe it does ), you just have to stop being a pussy and get on with it.

 

So, how do you plan on rectifying your looks? Are you going to bitch about it or figure out how to get on with it?

 

Looks can't be altered. At least to a sufficient degree. Muscle-building is limited to your potential. You can't change your height without massive surgery, expenses and pain, and there are several birth defects that can't be fixed or the guy lacks the money for it. What's the treatment for the many guys who are balding in their 20's?

 

Oh yeah, shave that. Girls like bald men . I'm sure the guy feels great to see his scalp.

 

Here's the type(s) I've seen women 18-35 go for:

 

1)tall and lanky.

2)Tall and fit.

3)tall and muscular.

4)average, until some better-looking dude/taller appears.

5)below-average but loaded with cash.

6)bad boy.

[ThaWholigan]

One thing though, I'm glad I discovered this site after I made some observations on my own about PUA and some of the lameness that is in it. PUA did help me because I actually started talking to girls because of it, and there is "some" good material out there. However, there are things in PUA that are disingenuous and can harm your chances with women in general if you aren't capable of differentiating between the common sense and the BS.

 

For instance, yeah you can't create attraction. NLP won't make her want to f*ck you (and if clocked, is creepy). Negging is stupid. Dressing like a twat is counterproductive. Amongst other things. At some point, you discard the crappy stuff and whittle it down to something you can add to your normal personality instead of being a gametard.

[xxoo]

My point is people get the best of what they can get and learn to become somehow attracted to it not that these women lust over the average guys but they somehow have to try to find something attratcive about them if its what they can get

 

I believe that underestimates the power of sexual chemistry.

 

If a person gets inside your head and can make you wild with passion in bed, it really doesn't matter if they are objectively beautiful, have a six pack, or whatever.

[Hawakai]

One thing though, I'm glad I discovered this site after I made some observations on my own about PUA and some of the lameness that is in it. PUA did help me because I actually started talking to girls because of it, and there is "some" good material out there. However, there are things in PUA that are disingenuous and can harm your chances with women in general if you aren't capable of differentiating between the common sense and the BS.

 

For instance, yeah you can't create attraction. NLP won't make her want to f*ck you (and if clocked, is creepy). Negging is stupid. Dressing like a twat is counterproductive. Amongst other things. At some point, you discard the crappy stuff and whittle it down to something you can add to your normal personality instead of being a gametard.

 

PUA doesn't work. The PUA gurus are all attractive guys or loaded with cash. I've seen many guys trying out that PUA stuff and it didn't work out at all. PUA was supposed to be like female make-up, but words and actions do not create sexual attraction. Unless you are a poet from Elizabeth's I reign or a decent-looking 17th century pirate.

[ThaWholigan]

PUA doesn't work. The PUA gurus are all attractive guys or loaded with cash. I've seen many guys trying out that PUA stuff and it didn't work out at all. PUA was supposed to be like female make-up, but words and actions do not create sexual attraction. Unless you are a poet from Elizabeth's I reign or a decent-looking 17th century pirate.

 

You cannot create sexual attraction at all. It is usually straight there, and yes it is physical.

 

Looks do matter. But you don't have to be a "8+" to get laid or get a GF. I think that guys who aren't make a lot of excuses and get in their own way. Not to say that it's their fault if they get rejected. That's just the way it is. I've been rejected a lot before, but once I started talking to more girls, I didn't care. Eventually I did get laid, and now I'm starting to get more interest and soon dating more girls. All because I didn't make excuses, I got on with it.

[threebyfate]

Possibly . That hasn't been considered, but I'd imagine if that's a conscious decision that's creepy .

Couldn't help myself from pointing out something that leapt into my face, screaming and waving its arms, saying "NOTICE ME".

 

What do you think of the site? It's very anti-PUA amongst other things, but I actually like it despite that because it offers something more substantial as a criticism of the creation of seduction amongst other things.

I'd have to cruise around the site to get a better feel of it. But I do agree with the concept of "type". Where I disagree is their rationale of what type is comprised of. My belief surrounds a combination of nature and nurture when it comes to attraction. The physical aspect is that it's not only a genome similarity drive but is heavily influenced by exposure to different genomes. The more sheltered your environment, the more you'll gravitate towards similar genome types. This includes exposure to diversity, as well as the magnitude of xenophobia expressed within close and closed environments.

 

But it also ties into the non-physical where you might select based on positive and even negative role models. I hypothesize that this ties into neurochem and neuropsych, where a prospective partner can recreate a similar dynamic comfort zone (as manifested by the reproduction of similar neurochem combination experienced while in your foundational environment), can heavily influence attraction.

 

You also can't forget selection by most differing DNA which negates similar genome selection theories. This theory potentially ties into pheromones and olfactory senses.

 

I need to stop here since it would take an entire boring thesis of one of my pet interests!

[PJKino]

You cannot create sexual attraction at all. It is usually straight there, and yes it is physical.

 

Looks do matter.

 

Thread should end here instead of all these articles of tiring psychoanalyzing of attraction

 

Some of us just arent willing to sift through hundreds of rejections till we find somebody who can stomach us physically that we probably wont be that into but its the only yes will get

[xxoo]

Thread should end here instead of all these articles of tiring psychoanalyzing of attraction

 

Some of us just arent willing to sift through hundreds of rejections till we find somebody who can stomach us physically that we probably wont be that into but its the only yes will get

 

It sounds like you have a problem getting past appearances and experiencing attraction.

 

Have you never experienced unexpected desire for a woman who wasn't conventionally attractive?

[Hawakai]

I believe that underestimates the power of sexual chemistry.

 

If a person gets inside your head and can make you wild with passion in bed, it really doesn't matter if they are objectively beautiful, have a six pack, or whatever.

 

First the guy needs to get in bed with her. That makes it necessary to have something that makes her sexually attracted.

[PJKino]

It sounds like you have a problem getting past appearances and experiencing attraction.

 

Have you never experienced unexpected desire for a woman who wasn't conventionally attractive?

 

I have varied tastes in women but if i find a women unatractive i dont care how nice she is its not gonna make me sexually into her if i cant picture making out with her never mind beign naked with her

[ThaWholigan]

Thread should end here instead of all these articles of tiring psychoanalyzing of attraction

 

Some of us just arent willing to sift through hundreds of rejections till we find somebody who can stomach us physically that we probably wont be that into but its the only yes will get

You are the exact kind of guy I'm talking about - making excuses. That's why you'll always be in the position you're in. If you aren't willing, you cannot complain.

 

And who says you can only get someone you don't like? That is only your fear.

 

Either way, it doesn't seem like there's anything I can do to help you. I've been trying almost since the day I came to this forum, and none of you have listened. While I took my own advice and actually got somewhere. So it's whatever. You can continue to carry on like this and bitch about girls only liking good looking guys.....